Sexcapades of Waffles

Since I have no bad beat stories to write I thought I would share some more of my past life with you. When I was a young man in my teens I met a lovely woman named Vanessa. She was a fiery red she devil and I really liked her. I met her through a bible study group. Excellent place to get laid by the way. If you are looking to hook up hit it. We spent a while dating and playing basketball together. She was a huge tomboy with gigantic tits and was a blast to hang out with.

Finally the night came when I could get lucky. I was still a virgin at 18 and had yet to find my stride. So she sets up this nice little candle deal next to her mattress. She takes off her shirt and bra and commands me to start sucking those mammoths. In true Waffles style I suddenly got a case of the super giggles and could not stop laughing. Hint to those inexperienced people out there: this is NOT the right thing to do. Anyhow this would NOT be the day I lost my virginity. I suppose I was just too nervous to pull it together. I can not really fathom any other reason for hysterical giggling here. It would be three more years before I had my next shot at not being a virgin. I really need to final table the WSOP and spend the in between months at one of the ranches. If you know what I mean. Peace out.