Monday, January 14, 2008

Brandi - The Cliff Notes

AKA - How many Sklanski Bucks does it take to fuck Brandi?

A recap of the Brandi thread on 2P2 for those of you with a life. Containing the highlights of pages 1-46. Updates possible later in the day.

The Real Truth About Brandi Hawbaker
It isn't easy for me to come on here and say what I am about to. I know many of you are going to laugh...and that is fine. I expect it and I know I deserve it. If I can however stop this from happening to anyone else, even if its just one other person, it will be worthwhile to me.


My name is Brandon and I have lived in Las Vegas for the past 5 years. As some on here know, I met Brandi Hawbaker around February 2007 basically because of my friendship with Dustin Woolfe.

Brandi is easily the best manipulater I have ever met. Besides being attractive, she is also very intelligent, which only compounds the situation. When I met her it was immediately after the Captain Tom/ Mark Newhouse situation. She was stripping at Spheriment Rhino and had just lost her entire net worth at the Bellagio. I approached her and we started talking. Boy, if I could just change one moment in my life, that would be it.

We started spending every day together from that point on and I soon realized what a mess her life was. She was living in a tiny efficiency behind paradise (for those not familar with Vegas, that is one of the worst neighborhoods. High crime, poverty etc). She had no car. Suspended drivers license. No bank accounts, credit cards etc and warrants for her arrest (traffic violations, bad checks, etc).

Obviously, this should have been the most immediate of red flags, but I didnt listen to my head. As anyone who has ever met Brandi can attest to, she has an uncanny ability to make those around her feel pityfor her. She plays the victim role well.

Even after a almost a year of spending day after day with her, Its still difficult for me to determine what was real and what was an illusion.

What I do know is this. I made a huge mistake. I thought for the past year I was saving somebody worth saving. That is not the case. Brandi is a broken person. There is no saving her or redemption possible. Whatever damage she inflicted on herself years ago can not possibly be undone. I tried very hard.

I stood by her when she told me her version of Captain Tom ripping her off. I even tried to convince myself she never stole from Mark eventhough in the back of my mind I knew the truth. I will say this Mark is an amazing guy. He is basically the type of guy that would give you the shirt of his back. He showed me text messages confirming what he had claimed about her all along and I still tried to justify it in my head. Throughout it all, he still was my friend knowing what Brandi did to him and knowing I never heeded his advice.

When I met Brandi, I was a pitboss in a casino in Vegas. While working one day, something told me to enter her name into a data base that casinos centrally use to collaborate information on cheats, barred patrons, prostitutes etc. I entered her name in hoping nothing would come back. Even expecting the worse, I was still shocked at with was displayed on the screen. Not only had she been barred from several casinos for loitering, bad checks, she had also been 86'd (casinos term for barred) for prostitution. Upon further examination, I found out she had been arrested several times in Las Vegas Casinos for soliciting undercover officers.

I confronted Brandi about this months ago. She cried and told me she had been homeless, she had no way to feed herself, she was on the streets and had no choice. How her mother had kidnapped her when she was young and was in and out of mental hospitals thru Brandi's younger years. Her tears seemed real and made my heart break. I knew how Brandi had attempted suicide several times and was hospitalized on and off since she was a teen. The scars on both her wrists made me cringe. I told myself she was a young girl who made bad choices and wanted to start a new life.

I paid off her warrants, got her drivers license re-instated, got her a bank account, paid off a debt she owed to Steve Zolotow for several thousand, got her on anti-depressants, and paid for her to see a psychologist twice a week.

Throughout this all I never listened to anyone. I wanted to believe in her. I thought I loved her and she was worth saving. My family and close friends (including some 2+2ers) that came into contact with her all tried to warn me over and over. They told me that Brandi was too damaged, been neglected for too long. That there was nothing that could be done. I shut my ears to them.

Throughout the year, she constantly told me how much she hated Las Vegas. Many bad memories she claimed. From Captain Tom, to being incarcarated for a few weeks,etc. She wanted us both to move to Los Angeles where she claimed she would be happier. I just couldnt do it. I should have ended this long ago but the sick thing is I couldnt do it because I couldnt let go. I thought I was protecting her and being a good man. Everytime we broke up, even if only for a week, she would find trouble. Whether it was in Sept when she went alone to the Borgota and called me frantically crying in the middle of the night claiming a well known poker pro who she was sharing a room with tried to sexually assault her, or during the world series when I had to rush to the hospital several times when she had no money for medical treatment or food to eat.

Two weeks ago, things finally hit a boiling point. There had always been violence in our relationship (never ever on my part) and things were starting to escalate over the fact it was apparent I was not moving to Los Angeles with her. She has no concept on how to survive or take care of herself like most of society does i.e paying bills, managing money, having healthy normal relationships, and especially the tedious every day boring activities that constitute life.

I ended up leaving my own home (huge mistake) because her mood swings and violence were becoming too severe. She agreed that it was best for us not to see each other and she would be moved out the first week of January. Like I had always done in the past, I agreed to give her $5,000 to get her life going in LA. It was always pointless, everytime we broke up I gave her 5k-10k because I couldnt just throw her out on the street dead broke and have it on my conscious. I knew what she would resort to doing to make money. And it was always the same result. She would call me a fews days later telling me she loved me, was broke, and crying asking me to help change her life, how she didnt want to live like this any longer.

Two weeks and she was suppose to be gone. Well, she became very bitter that our relationship was finally ending. She ended up stealing a great deal of my property and belongings from my home and selling it. Probably around 40k or so. She is actually at commerce right now, where she is staying, losing my money one hand at a time. I have filed multiple police reports as well as gathered witnesses (neighbors), that can attest to her stealing property and selling it. I have to wait until the Las Vegas burgulary unit conacts me and advises me the best way to proceed.

I need to apologize to alot of people, mainly my family and close friends. I am lucky that I have amazing family and friends surrounding me. I also need to apologize for the arrogance I displayed on here many months ago when I first started posting. I wasnt even close to fully grasping the situation I was involved in. In my heart I always thought I was really protecting her by keeping her lies (such as the $100,000 cd, stripping during the world series, and so many many many more horrible things I still wont disclose that I know about her).

Brandi, being the excellent liar and manipulator that she is will Im sure deny most if not everything I wrote. But it cant be denied. Anyone who knows me well can attest that although I am definitely a flawed person, I am honest, genuine and good hearted. My reputation is not in dispute. Besides, I have police records, cancelled checks, and other indisputable proof. Knowing Brandi, she will once again claim the victim role.

I realize now she has made her life out of hurting, stealing and lying to people that have cared for her. I take responsibility for my stupidity and for whatever public wrath comes my way. I just hope that anyone ever involved in our poker community that comes in contact with her will please just heed the advice that I was to ignorant to.


David Sklansky
"Many of the things I know, I have witnessed and would have no problem explaining if it really served a purpose. However, I am not sure if things I know about second hand or even have witnessed regarding others would be appropriate to disclose i.e sklansky, relationships with other well known pro's, things that she did to earn money during the world series etc. Its not my role or intent to embarass anyone else further."

You have my permission to post anything that you think you know about me that is both important and is something you think I am keeping secret. Either do that or kindly retract your implication.

I was in no way implying any first hand knowledge involving you. Besides our few conversations in public and one or two phone calls, that basically consitutes the extent of my relationship with you. My inference was to the fact that Brandi told me many things regarding you and your relationship with her. I obviously cant confirm the vailidity of something told to me second hand. That was what I was implying. Its appartent to me that there is obviously no merit in anything she ever told me regarding you. Which is why I will not disclose anything slanderous she has said.

Now, if you want me to repeat what she told me and others at various points during the summer, that is different altogether

David Sklansky
No. That I don't want. I only asked you to post what you thought might be true. I'm not going to spend hours proving I didn't have sex with three billy goats or whatever else you might claim she said.


Well that was my point. She obviously told me among other things why SHE claims she ended her relationship with you. I felt it would be a disservice to repeat anything she had ever said knowing what i now know. However, I am not the only person she said these things to.

I have no problem repeating anything told to me, as others can collaborate it coming from Brandi as well. I wont if David does not approve

Link to suitable for work David Goat Picture

David Sklansky
For the record I don't have the slightest idea why she stopped calling me. The last time I talked to her she was heading out of Vegas and there was no hint she was mad about something. I did lecture her during that conversation because she blew some money she had set aside to give someone and blamed that person for not coming to get it. But such conversations were nothing new.

Three months later I bumped into her and I was surprised she ignored me. I figured it was either that conversation or someone telling her not to talk to me. Actually I thought it was you. As far as anything slanderous she could have said about me, the worst would have been my Machiavellian advice as to how to best take advantage of all the high rollers going gaga over her. As far as getting staked. Not stealing. And as you well know, I did advise her to pay Mark.

You are implying that she accused me of much worse things. What is odd about that, if you are to be believed, is that there would have been no motive for her to do that.

Hello? I can't almost believe what I am reading! Motive? After everything you know firsthand and have witnessed involving her you question any of this because its not logical behavior??????? Wow.

Stealing from Mark wasnt logical. Claiming people have hurt her when they have only tried to help her is not logical. Her making a dupe account on here and posting about you is not logical. Losing money and claiming she had been robbed, sexually assaulted is not logical. There is not motive. There is no logic. This is a sickness without rythme or reason.

Hot Quote Paraphrased from David
For the record David Slansky would not advise young women to have butt sex with old men for buyins to high stakes poker tournaments.

pimprexel (paraphrased by Waffles)
Brandi Says Sklanski said she would need to sleep with rich guys to make it in poker. Actually matches up good with his comment above.

David Sklansky
Things now begin to make sense. This was the "slanderous" accusation she made against me? I didn't say those things but I did tell her that guys will stake her if they think they have a chance with her. Even if they think it is negative EV for them. Maybe she thought I was insulting her poker ability with those words.

Waffles Interpretation
You suck at poker Brandi but if guys thing you suck your in like Flynn.

Waffles Description of next few pages of filler
Phil Ivey gets pulled into this somehow.

Marital Status: It's rumored that she might be dating or just sleeping with Carlos Mortenson.

Johnny Hughes
There have always been con artists and angle shooters around poker. It is good that Brandi put a beat on pimp/Brandon. That's her job. She's a con, he's a mark, like Newhizzle but with less class.

Here's a fool bragging that he likes hard drugs and being a fool. It's not like Brandi isn't known for borrowing money to play poker. She is like crime, she does not pay. All you have to say to someone like that is, "Go rob somebody else."

There are herds of damsels in distress in the gambling joints all over the world. The reason we write about Brandi is that she is a good con artist that has made some good scores and pitched it off.

This is Skinnerian. Stimulus. Response. Action. Reward or punishment. She tells a sad story and acts out sorrow, and the sucker puts out his money.

She's done it before. She'll do it some more.

As a teenager, a couple of other guys and I went to a small black bootlegger's afterhours joint. We gave a guy $ $50 go get some booze. He never came back. We were conned. The owner told us we better leave and said, "Just consider that $5 worth of education."

This concludes the first 46 pages of the Brandi Saga. Summary. She is fucked up and needs help. Two Plus Two is more fucked up and needs even more help. Johnny Hughes is cool. David fucks Goats but hides it behind the Brandi scandal.


Blogger John G. Hartness said...

dammit. If I'd found this before the 2+2 post I could have saved hours of my life.

2:06 PM

Blogger Chad C said...

Waffles, you are infatuated with internet whores huh? Next thing you know you will be telling us that she plays poker better than she sucks dix for money......

2:29 PM

Blogger Blinders said...

The worst bad beat of all is how homely Brandi is. All this fuss over an L.A. 4 tops? Silly, just silly. When Shannon Elizibeth starts crying on my shoulder, you better beleive I got her bankroll.

3:02 PM

Blogger jusdealem said...

I can't believe how some men are soooo stupid. There is no chick worth all that money and headache. What losers.

3:50 PM

Blogger Fuel55 said...

Some classic stuff baby

6:43 PM

Blogger Unknown said...

Hughes is indeed the man.

6:30 AM


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home