Getting to Vegas

My feelings on going to Vegas were a little bit mixed. On one hand I was incredible excited. The excitement was mounting so high that I could not even work on Friday. I was going to meet people I felt I had known for up to two years. These are people who had been with me through some enjoyable times and some difficult ones. In some ways it is easier to connect with people online. Instead of the bullshit of what they look like and how they act you get a deeper feeling of who they are through listening to what they have to say. I totally considered many of these people to be my friends.

On the other hand you never really know how these things are going to go. I remember my last trip to Vegas. Coincidentally this was eighteen years ago – when I was eighteen. I flew out to see my grandmother but my real reason was to meet Becky. I am surprised I can even remember her name. A lot of parallels exist in these two stories as she also was someone I met online. We had been talking for a few months and I was excited to see her. In this case the meeting did not go well as she ended up hanging out with another guy for most of my time there.

In addition I knew that in order to go out to Vegas and expand upon the relationships I had started I would have to leave my anonymity behind. Instead of the faceless insane Waffles I would now be a real person. People would know who I was and in some ways it was a little sad to kill of the persona and give a face to the wild man. It was however a sacrifice I was willing to make.

As I drove off to T.F. Green Airport I saw a billowing smoke cloud in the sky. “Oh fuck” I thought, the road would be closed off and I would miss my flight. As it turns out the burning car was on the other side of the road. Up on an embankment it was engulfed in flames. Being the true degenerate gambler I am, instead of thinking “I hope that nobody was in there”, I wondering if this was an Omen for my trip. If so would it mean that I was going down in flames or that I would rise in a splendid pyre of flame soaring towards the heavens as a phoenix reborn in the golden lights of Vegas.

I made my flight in plenty of time and had to spend a few hours in T.F. Green playing ancient arcade games. I rocked at Galaga although I could not beat the high score. I sucked at Donkey Kong which was how I remembered it. It is always fun to play the games I grew up on in the various Christies markets around Boston.

My stopover in Newark was not too bad with the exception of the poorly designed airport. It appears as if every speaker in the place is attached to every terminal. So when you hear, “Now Boarding Rows 19-31”, you can not tell where the hell it came from. The boarding wench was very angry when I went up in front of the line by accident. Fix your goddamn system then you morons. Just to rub it in you have to watch a movie where the dorky CEO tells you how great Continental is as you eat the soggy micro waved mystery meat on the flight. I got seated right in front of the restroom. Which sort of sucked as waifs of urine smell would assault my nose every once in a while. It would not have been so bad if not for ImTooGoodForPissBitch. She stated whining about how she ABSOLUTELY could not sit near the restroom. She did not know how anyone could possibly stand it. So the flight crew told her they would do what they could. I knew this meant doom for me and I was right. PissBitch was moved up front and a gaggle of screaming kids were moved back to the urinals. Great move stewardess let the little kids smell the piss, hell they smell like piss anyways. At least they fell asleep or were murdered soon after the flight took off. I did not notice which and really could care less. Finally we flew in over Vegas. My first impression of this Mecca of gamboolers was that it looked as if a Christmas tree had puked over an entire city. I saw greens and blues and purples. All the colors of the rainbow and some that had never been seen in nature. All calling out to me and beckoning me, screaming: “Welcome to Vegas” in short blinking S.O.S code. It was fantastic.

As I stepped off the plane I noticed instantly that Vegas wanted my money. Like some scary predators slots and all forms of gambling machines assaulted my senses as soon as I left the plane. I would not be able to escape this constant barrage for my entire trip. As if scared or excited by these predators the crowd pushed and bumped each other. Shoving and jostling for position. I hate being crowded and this annoyed the hell out of me.

I finally made it to the MGM hotel in one piece. I was here. For better or for worse I had made it to my first Blogger get together. I would soon be gambling it up with my brethren. For better or for worse I was in Vegas for the second time in my life.

Next Episode: Meeting the Bloggers.