Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Christmas Sucks

Fuck Christmas. I fucking hate this holiday. I know I am doing it wrong. I should just order everything on and fucking who cares if the kids see their presents beforehand and lose all faith in Santa Clause and their parents honesty. Fuck them. It is a good life lesson. Adults just want to fuck with you.

I can not stand going to the mall. First I have to sit in fucking bumper to bumper traffic for like 30 minutes. All to find a fucking Jonas Brothers fagot ass shirt. Of course none of the fucking malls I go to have one. My goddamn girl is like eight. Why the fuck does she need a goddamn Jonas Brothers faggot ass shirt anyways? Goddamn assholes.

I went to get like five things and like three goddamn malls later and I only have like 2 of the things I wanted. Also my wife gets the like XBOX 360 Connect or something for the kid. I am so fucking out of it. I do not know what the hell that is. Can it play old 360XBOX games? Does it need a controller for those? What the fuck. I am a techy and a gamer and have no fucking clue. So fucking strike out there too because I have no fucking idea if I need to get him something else or not.

Goddamn fucking greedy ass kids too. I mean we spend like over a grand on Christmas because everyone wants fucking CIA bugged electronics and shit. Fuck the like dollar matchbox cars. Ohhh noo. We want basketball backboards and computers and fucking crap like that.

The worst fucking part too? That goddamn fat fucking pervert who comes down the chimney gets all the fucking credit!!! It is like "Wow, why are mom and dad so fucking cheap, look Santa brought me an iPad". Goddamn fucking him with one of his fucking elves right up the asshole. I fucking hate that guy.

How the hell did all this shit start too? I mean are you fucking serious? I see it now. Santa came down to earth and sacrificed his fat ass on the cross so that you could spend a bazillion dollars you do not have on peace, justice, and the American way of consumerism. Fuck man. I would pay to make that goddamn movie "The Passion of Santa". Fucking strap that cross on the mother fucking fat cookie eating asshole and fucking stab those thorns in his head. Goddamn. Sign me up.

So a Fuck you Christmas to all and a fucking horrible night! Peace.


Blogger StB said...

You should ask for a hooker for Christmas. Get out some of that aggression.

7:54 AM

Blogger Kajagugu said...

Kinect is a camera attachment to the 360 that let's you use your body as the controller for some of the games.

Yes, you need games for it, of course.

No, it will not be able to track your movements as you idly sit on the sofa and fart.

8:03 AM

Blogger MorningThunder said...

A heart three sizes too small....Jesus is either smiling or crying. Depends on his mood I suppose.

8:04 AM

Blogger Astin said...

Kinect = attachment to 360.

You do know that amazon ships things in boxes, right? And boxes are opaque. Unless your kids have x-ray vision, they can't see in the boxes.

Or ship 'em to your neighbours or a PO box.

9:56 AM

Blogger Schaubs said...

Fuck count = 32.

good job.

10:04 AM

Blogger The Wife said...

Nice to have our own personal Scrooge so the rest of us can be cheery around the holiday!

Watch your blood pressure Waffles!

10:30 AM

Blogger Champ said...


12:19 PM

Blogger Wolfshead said...

Hope you got all that out of your system. Yes, you can shop online and as was said the stores usually rebox the items so you don't see what you are buying (BTW, if you are shopping Amazon use the link on my page please.)

Hell things are just as bad here. The last minute decision to hit the WPBT screwed me all up, never thinking that was the time I did all my online shopping. Just went out and got my daughter a couple shirts so she would have something to unwrap as most of her gifts are in the form of promissary coupons this year. Since I have no idea what games she wants for her Wii or DX or what books she wants we're going to go on a shopping trip once she gets down here. So improvise sir, improvise. I know you won't disappoint the kids.

6:06 PM

Blogger BamBam said...

I'd go Schaubs +1, but I fucking hate comments like that. So instead, I'll go with have a Merry Fucking Christmas Waffles!


5:18 AM


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