Sunday, September 27, 2015

Towed

Life is funny. I get divorced and everyone says sorry, but I am like fuck ya! I get a "promotion" at work, and everyone says fuck ya! I am like noooooooo! Things have been a little busy and crazy. Instead of posting the next Okie Vegas entry... I will give you some insanity... The other day my car got towed and I got a little angry... I mean why should I know when a stupid, not great, football team is playing? This has been building up from promotion, plumbers leaving shit and whatever sewer shit in my sink after it being broken for a month, and other things... So I bring you various texts to my friends ...

First when I was towed:
I'ts War Time!
Last straw car towed because of BC game
WARRRR!!!!!
They will have no more football!
I'm past my psycho point.
It's on!
I can't even get ahold of anyone, fuck it I'll break it out and run over the entire football team
I'm gonna hunt down the guys who did our sink too
I'm gonna steal a back hoe and dig up the entire field until it's a pit or they shoot me
We need media attention about this bullshit!
I'm gonna make my car like Road Warrior, BOOOM!!!
Watch the BC game I am gonna kneecap the QB
Fucking Cock Rags tow my car!
How the fuck am I supposed to know when a division 6 team plays?

Then I had to take the train to get the car:
Fucking gotta deal with Red Sox fans on the train too.
Fucking tools
Fucking work promotion
Gotta fucking clean shit filled sink
Fucking cock rags
Fucking annoying week
Gotta walk down 93 or some shit
Prolly 200 bucks (ended up 180, 105 for tow plus 75 ticket)
Fucking dude with herp bumping me in train
Least the crowds are gone
Fucking gay Asians doing stupid shit (passed some crowded Asian fair, hate crowds)
Black guy made me pay homeless buck to not rape me with his homeless cock (Gave a homeless guy a dollar)
Extortion I say!
Prolly get gang raped at Pine Street woman's shelter
Now Google wants to murder me, making me walk on the highway
Fucking Skynet
Fucking 180 bucks for not knowing BC doesn't suck
I am gonna steal a back hoe and dig a fucking giant hole
I am wiring C4 like Mad Max
BOOM! Collect insurance. Much easier!
Now I have to walk through homeless killers on the highway to get my car back
I don't even know where gps is taking me, probably a CIA trap!
Those homeless chicks at the shelter were looking at me like "It tastes like chicken"

After I "calmed down":
I am going to War with BC!
They will pay!
I will make BC degrees so worthless they will suck homeless cock and towel the sperm off with their degree!
When I am finished their degrees will be used to towel off homeless spuge!
I am getting a V for Vendette costume, and a hoodie, and a hockey stick!
I am going to do a YouTube rant show dressed as V with a hoodie and a hockey stick, and overthrow society so that BC degrees will be worthless!

Despite all the rage I am still just a rat in a cage!

I like to get all my rage out in one shot.. imagine if I kept it in.. THAT would be dangerous..




2 Comments:

Blogger Miami Don said...

Nothing quite like a Waffles rant

Just like the good old days.

5:35 PM

 
Blogger Jestocost said...

Wow, Waffles came back and I'm only just figuring it out!

Glad to hear life is more on track these days.

8:38 AM

 

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