Thursday, October 26, 2006

Top Ten Waffles Bashers

Now before you all get your panties in an uproar this is being done as a fun lookback on some of the more interesting comments made about me over the years. It does not mean I do not think you worship me because I know you all do.

10. GoBeRude DuggleBugger
Now you would think that DuggleBugger would be my #1 arch nemesis but this is not true. He only rates a measley ten because he likes yelling at everyone.

SirFWALGMAN can barely write at all, but he manages to spit out some very entertaining stuff for someone with no better than 3rd grade english skills. He posts A LOT, so you will sometimes see three or four posts a day from the guy, and then hear nothing for three days. Just when you're afraid someone has hit him in the head and left him for dead in a ditch, he comes back like nothing happened. It's great stuff.
-- DuggleBugger Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Our relationship goes back a long ways though. Sometimes I can even find some nice things he has said about me. It almost makes me want to tear up.

I started reading SirF because he was incredibly prolific. He would post three or four times per day, and it was pretty entertaining stuff. He has slowed down since he busted out in DAZZLING fashion. I still read his stuff and enjoy playing with him at the Party Poker tables, because he's a great guy who loves to talk about poker. He's one of the good guys.
-- DuggleBugger Thursday, March 31, 2005

Of course he did predict my demise a little bit early. I am a stubborn bastard.

Sir wiffle waffle is the easiest to criticize. He disappeared! I guess he quit playing, which might be a good idea considering the roller coaster ride his poker play was. It was fascinating to watch the highs and lows, but it was like watching "Titanic." As interesting as the subplots were, we knew it wasn't going to end well.
-- DuggleBugger Thursday, August 18, 2005

All in all despite the fact that I think his 3rd grade English teacher raped him and everytime he rammed it in his little asshole he said "It's THEIR DAMMIT! NOT THERE!!!!" I have no real problem with guys who speak their minds.

Slob is a newcomer to the scene. We have had alot of fun yelling at each other in chat. Not all of it has been on his side either. I mean who could forget the blowup I had at him recently? I think he intends to take over the mantle of the crazyman if I ever give it up. Alot of his posts remind me of a crude less lovable version of me.

8. Trauma Poker
That wise ass comment you posted gets you a number eight spot baby. Trauma is a fun guy. I love playing MTTs with him because he is ALWAYS fucking up when he has big leads. For those of you who have not seen his quote I have republished it in full below. I am so glad I played "The Big Game".

21:29EST 1 minute to Blogger Big Game
PG2-“Hey the Blogger Big Game is starting in 1 minutes, we need to mess with this one FOR SURE”
PG1-“Indeed. Give me a roll call, who we got playing?”
PG2-“Smokkee, slb, blinders, kat, sirfwalgman,….”
PG1-“SIRF!! It’s almost too easy, let’s get him”
PG2-“He has his entire FTP bankroll on the line I don’t know if I want to screw him that bad, how about a bad beat as chip leader at the final table and he just slips into the money?”
PG1-“No lets bubble him.”
PG2-“That is too obvious bubbling him is getting old….wait I got it! Let’s get him out on the FIRST HAND!!”
PG1-“That’s sick, I like it, but sick. Who should give the benefit of the early double up to?”
PG2-“How about smokkee?”
PG1-“No he just took down 5K at Commerce he doesn’t need extra chips. I say kat or CC from pokerworks.”
PG2-“OK heads CC, tails kat call it in the air”
PG2-“It’s heads, you always lose coin flips!! CC it is hope he enjoys this….”
- Trauma Poker, Recently

7. SirALCantHang
Now Al has said many unkind things to me over the years but since I know he has forgotten most of them because of loss of brain cells I think all he can really rate is spot seven. Keep trying though big boy, I know you have it in you. He has put out numerous bounties on my head including the most recent on in the last Mookie.

If someone can bust SirWaffles then I will pay their next entry into the Mookie, and if they can do it with a massive suckout I will pay the next two!!!
-- AlCantHang - Last Mookie, BTW you Owe TexasKaty!

Al mostly is here not because of any discouraging remarks he has made but because he fucking beats me in everything except Poker. It is like that big brother I never had and thank the fuck I never will. We compete in video games, and map entries and all kinds of things and he always wins. Dispite this Al is one of the best guys I know.

6. Mr. Dreamy

How can you take a guy who has fucked women in every 3rd world country in the world, and beat up more fuggly looking poker kids in backroom games than anyone calling you a pussy? It hurts man. Scott is a man's man. He was this close this weekend to throwing a guy to a bunch of Mexicans and fucking his girlfriend. I love this guy! One day I will earn his respect. Help me daddy.

Quit crying you little bitch. Insert your tampon and stop the bleeding. If it went the other way I would be reading about your great play. What are you doing committing all your chips on the first hand of a tournament anyway? Fuck the read you had you always know there is a luck factor out there if you have anything less than the stone cold nuts. You are playing against BLOGGERS!!!! people that regularly shove mounds of chips in against each other with the worst starting hand in poker. Now shut up, suck it up, let your testis drop again and be a man...
-- Mr. Dreamy

5. Biggestron

Who could forget the Byyyyronnnn Incident. Last time I tell a guy with a sissy name that he has a sissy name. Ooops.

4. Absenthine

He gets an honerary mention for enjoying my bustout in "The Big Game".

3. Drizztzzccktt

Drizz is actually the guttersnipe of the comments section. He rarely comes out on his blog and says anything bad about me but I can count on him to be the first person to mention me negatively in any comments section of any blog anywhere in the Blogsphere. I think he thinks he is helping me or something. Ahh well.

Will they have Blackjack in the upper right hand corner for Waffles?
Drizztdj - Thursday, June 08, 2006

2. Chris Halverston
Where the hell has that fucker gone to? He used to be one of the Major players doing it old school with his grinding at LHE. He was a great help in getting me started blogging. I probably would never have kept this blog up this long if not for him. I give him the coveted number two spot because I firmly beleive he started the monkier
of Waffles! Bastard!

1. Felicia Lee
Felicia and I have known each other for a while and she is another person who I respect because she tells you how she feels. She does not pussy foot around. She will always be number one on this list though. If it is not for trying to get me to quit poker (which might actually be a favor), or calling me names.

You should quit poker.
-- Felicia Lee - Kicking me when I am down

You look like a serial killer, btw. Charles Manson has nothing on you
-- Felicia Lee

She is giving me nice awards like the worst blog in this universe or any other parrellel universe. I wish I could find that post. I think she may have *cough* archived it? heh.

One of my biggest regrets in Vegas was not spending more time with her. You get caught up in the whirlwind of meeting everyone and you just can not fit everything in. So here is to hoping she keeps on my case for years to come.

Honestly this was kind of fun to do. I always enjoy reading about myself of course. I found it surprising that there actually was very little negativity out there about me. I guess you all do reall love me. *sniff*.


Blogger HighOnPoker said...

This was a very enjoyable post, but I'm a little disappointed that I didn't make the list. I guess I should be more of an asshole to you. That said, I give you extra kudos for sticking Duggles at 10th (its like you are insulting him for not being insulting enough, which I imagine is very insulting to a guy like Duggles), and for your great write up on McMoneyBags. Great stuff, Woffles, you whiny bitch fag.

6:36 AM

Blogger AlCantHang said...

Damn, only number 7. I'll have to try harder next time.

Of course, my ragging is all in jest. It's even a bonus if I can get a little Duggle/Waffles mini-battle going

7:17 AM

Blogger jjok said...

I'd walk through the gates of hell with you waffles......

Can I be atop your biggest supporters list coming out soon?


Then fuck you and you suck at poker.

7:45 AM

Blogger 23skidoo said...

If someone hasnt pissed you off at some point or another then they aren't trying very hard.

You should take a 'month' off more often.

I keed I keed

9:52 AM

Blogger slb159 said...

What did I ever do to you? Haha.

11:39 AM

Blogger TraumaPoker said...

I don't know what hurts worse that I am on the list or that you know how I blow my wad with a big stack tounr MTT's. I bow down to SIRF.

12:04 PM

Blogger Drizztdj said...

I definitely need to work harder at this.

6:29 AM

Anonymous biggestron said...

5th - I'm honoured! Thanks Maaaaaaaaarshal.

6:07 PM


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