I have been reading Tony's blog lately and I can sympathize with the guy. I think we have a lot in common. Not sure what he is going to do but I hope he gets things straightened out.
In talking to him in a few comments I kinda of got to feeling that my blog has gone downhill a bit. I used to write a lot more quality posts and I guess I have been a little bored or something because my writing lately has kind of sucked. Perhaps nothing much is going on. I am not sure. So in honor of my (hopefully) new reader Tony I am going to post some links to some of the better posts on my blog. These are the ones that really kind of tell you who I am.
Days of My Life. I have done this kind of post a few times but it really says who I am and how I grew up. It talks about insecurity with women and not getting too many to go out with me. It also talks about some of the good things.
The whole of November 2004 is really good reading. You can see the super up's and down's. You can tell every single post that I am one bad night away from throwing it all away. Unlike Tony I do not live on my poker winnings but it shows the whole chasing mentality. The worst thing a poker player can do is focus on the money. If I had a losing night you would see my down post about how much bad luck I have and inevitably it would eventually get to me and I would throw a big bet on a higher stakes table or something like that. Most of the time I would get lucky and win and everything would be fine for a little while. All of this focus on winning every day is entirely destructive behavior for a good poker player.
Oops, I did it Again. This is my first REALLY big bustout. I had busted down 1k and had some money to work with left. This time I took the entire 3k I had spent like 6-8 months working for and lost it all in one 30 hour binge session. I remember just the utter feelings of despair the next morning when I woke up and realized what I did. I was hoping it was just a bad dream. If you read it though it is the same pattern I always did, lose a little, try and win it back, go higher stakes, keep losing. I know for Tony it is more with the machine and stuff like that but it's the same chasing the loses thing. I can totally relate to the guy.
Anyway, I hope people enjoy some of the old reads. I am going to try and do more quality posts in the future. I just need to refocus a bit and get a little motivated. Peace.