The Donkey Rules.. Long Live the Donkey

So when I had last left you I had a slight slide. Not all was bad as I got to play some poker with a guy I have been waiting years to meet: BAD BLOOD! He was a cool guy and I wish I had spent more time with him. Vegas is funny. If you stay for just a weekend there is no way to do EVERYTHING you want.. So last time I came I socialized and this time I played Poker.. Who knows what is going to happen next time.

So with the next day coming up I decided to follow MiamiDon to the Rio and get my first taste of 2/5 NLHE. It was interesting for sure. I ended up seated with at least two players who play 5/10 NLHE at least semi regular. One was a dumb punk kid we will call Doofus. He honestly probably made money playing his game but I did not see any skill in his play. It was totally ABC and very unimpressive.

The other was the woman of my dreams. She was sexy as hell wearing her black T-Shirt, No Bra.. and stretching.. for me.. every once in a while. Picture this lovely lady reaching her hands behind her chair and pulling her body taunt. Yummy! I know she wanted me. Man could she play this game too. Now part of my opinion is obviously formed because she hit nearly every flop and ended up with hands like straight flushes vs sets and things like that. However I could tell she had skillz and I was suitably impressed.

The guy in the first seat gets the AlCantHang: Rolled by a Hooker award as he told us about this one 240 pound hooker that reached down his pants and as he battled her off his money clip went missing. Congrats!

So I sat down at the table with my 400 buyin and decided I would play strong. I would fold hands. I would play a great game. The first two hands I am in an Asian lady re-raises me and I have to fold. So when I lead out with my AJ and she slides 100 more over I assume she is playing me again. So I JAM my stack in she has 100 left and instantly calls.. and turns over JJ..

Now even though our buddy says that hand is good he is full of shit. I ended up flopping a straight draw.. and the straight completed runner-runner but to the six, for a split pot. Better than losing!!!

I had one good hand against my Angel where I thought I picked up on a betting pattern. I had T5o and the flop comes Txx. She bets out 35 which was her standard bet. She did not always c-bet but enough to take down pots. I cold called with my middle pair weak ass kicker. The turn comes a jack. Normally when she had a good hand she would bring out an intimidating stack of a hundred or so.. So when she bet out seventy I decided to play back at her and re-raise another 100. She must have not had anything since she folded. She may have had a better ten. She is a player though and is not going to go crazy with second pair.

Eventually I started losing small pots where she would bet out her thirty five and I would call to see if I could catch a good hand on the turn. She would then bring out her hundred and I would have to fold. Sometimes I folded weak top pairs. She was running over me. I started to get pissed off at my play and soon found myself somehow down to my last fifty.

It was at this time I decided to call upon the Donkey Gods to save my ass. The first donkey hand I played I raise a pair of kings pre-flop and get called by this pony tail fucker. The flop comes AQJ giving me a straight draw. I jam the rest in representing the Ace and you know what he calls me with? Fucking A2o. What the fuck? So I was not all that sad when I turned the ten for the winning hand.

I chipped up on a few nice pots back to 200ish and then put my fonkey donkey back on and played out this hand. The Doofus limps in EP. I look down and see AJ s000ted Hearts in LP so I raise it to 20 to take it down. He re-jams me for 60 more. I think what kind of hand limp jams? I guessed maybe a small pair.. so I decide to try and push him off the hand.. and I jam my entire stack in. He calls and flips over AK! ARG!

Wait my friends this is not a normal Waffles story. The flop comes JJx 1 heart. The turn is a heart the river is a.. you guessed it.. heart.. BOOYAH! He said nice catch, and the I decide to tilt him. I say nice limp. He was like I had you where I wanted you.. and I am like ya but you could have won the hand instead. He was FUMING and dieing to get into any pot with me.

I saw many of the peeps walking around the Rio. I saw CC rushing off god knows where in some Orange shirt. He looked like a giant Sunkist. Heh. Carmen was working her tail off all day at the Rio covering the Ladies Event and stopped by to tell me Don had left and would come back later for me. This made me slightly nervous about missing my plane. Weak came by to warm me about the Doofus who plays 5/10. Finally it was time to go and I racked up my 400 in chips and felt lucky.

It is days like that day where I am constantly reminded that the best play does not always win. It is in fact very often that the best play does not win. Poker is a game of skill.. but it is also a game of luck.. and the sooner you realize this the better off you will be. I also paid a lot of attention to my Angel in seat 10 and learned a ton. I have ideas on adjusting my cash game especially my starting hand selection. I also have decided I need to let hands that I am not willing to call a raise with go. Even if I am ahead in the hand. The idea of poker is not to be right it is to win. Sometimes being right costs you way too much money. Anyway.. I have things to consider and mull over.

The flight home was pretty uneventful. I did fall asleep on the corner of the window and ended up having a red line through my head for most of the day. Ouch. I was also dehydrated from Vegas and got some nice cramps last night. You know the ones. Wake up from sleep in total agony until your calf stop trying to rip itself from the bone.

All in all I enjoyed myself and the 400 lost at the tables was worth the experience. I got to see a lot of old friends and meet some new ones. Vegas is always a blast and one of these years I am going to get out there for a week. Until then I will see you at the Mookie tonight. Yes. I got a new computer. Bayne is dooooomed!