Tuesday, December 22, 2009

By Popular Demand, Hoyazo Recap, with Commentary

Without further ado a recap of Hoyazo's win in the mini-FTOPS.

First I called an allin reraise from the guy to my left with the funny Asian name, and when my A4o held up against his K9.

Waffles: This is why I can't win MTTs. I don't know what world an all in jam call with A4 is good. People have informed me that tourney players trying to stack off with A-Rag is rare but I see a repeating pattern here.

Hour 2 started off relatively uneventful, with my only big pot being one where I called a preflop steal-reraise from a short stack and my A7s, was up against 99 and failed to connect

Waffles:Here we see again the tourist. Please continue reading as our favorite delusional player laments all his bad luck and how he only got lucky once in this tourney. Ace Rag is the secret of the masters.

I got my first real big hand of the tournament early in Hour 3, when I moved AJo allin preflop against a suspected stealer on a shortish stack, but then disappointingly I also got called allin by a third player whom I did not expect to stay in the hand. Turns out my JackAce was against Q8 and TT.

Waffles:See Ace Rag again. Damn man I wish I knew Ace Rag was the fucking nuts. Fuck dude I can't even win with a nut straight on the turn.

which was important because bad beat #5 against me was lurking right around the corner

Waffles:OMFG. That's a bad beat? AQ (AKA Ace Rag AKA the MTT fucking ballah hand) vs JT? I wish I ran so good that I thought that was a bad beat.

Not to blow this hand up into anything bigger than it was, but suffice it to say I do not believe I have ever been bad beat as much in any one tournament as I was in MFTOPS #17

Waffles:See above laughing at his opinion of bad beats. I suppose his A7 being up against 99 was a bad beat too. STFU dude.

Hard to say why I did what I did here (both opponents folded), other than the generic sensing of weakness.

Waffles:OMFG. Jam A3 on the river because I sensed weakness? No! BECAUSE IT'S THE TOURNEY PLAYER NUTZ BABY! Into two fucking people how do you not get called? Then bemoan your bad luck? If it was me I just get called because Poker hates me like a motherfucker.

Here's me getting coolered bigtime again a short while later in Hour 4, as I rivered the nut flush against one of these FTOPS gold jersey donks who are almost invariably the worst players at any table they are seated at

Waffles:I fucking bluffed with second pair, made my pathetic hand against a better hand, and fucking call it a cooler? um, ya, right. cooler.

Notice again, another guy calling me stupid in the chatbox.

Waffles:Um, Maybe they are right?

I was very wrong

Waffles:First intelligent thing in his whole fucking post up till now.

Few hands later I added another 8k when the guy across the table called me down preflop and after the Ace-high flop with A2 despite my UTG preflop raise:

Waffles:In other words "My Ace Rag is brilliant and yours sucks". It just baffles me how his A9 play is soooooo much better than the other guys with a weaker Ace.. I suppose if he had AT then it would have been bad luck and a cooler that could start the next ice age.

This, from the same guy calling me an idiot in the chat earlier.

Waffles:Again, maybe they are right..

Eight minutes into Hour 5, I had my new biggest hand of the tournament. I open-raised from middle position with AQs.


I should note for the record that, in retrospect, my preflop call with this hand was pretty much the worst poker play I ever make

Waffles:I never know how to react when Hoyazo actually admits to making a mistake. Part of me feels like I should give him a pass. Nahh. Doubtful this is your worst play ever. Possibly betting into two guys all the time with nothing could be. Bluffing off your stack with middle pair. Calling off with the tourist. Hmm. Like I said Doubtful.

How do I lose this? He's got just 4 outs twice, plus I have eight other redraw outs. I'm going to be top 3 in the 5050 at the same time as this Mini FTOPS run.

Waffles:Retard most of your money is in the middle already. How does he not get all in? You fucked this up wayyyyyyy before the flop. Plus your BEHIND! Actually I could be wrong here because I cant tell how 32k got in the middle there at the point of his picture? Like did the guy raise and Hoy re-raised with K4 because obviously he was stealing or something? I just can't like figure it out how 32k is in the middle with k4 diamonds.

Donk! No part of the flush at all.

Waffles:This was a pretty funny comment. The guy who Hoyazo called a donk had OESD + Overs vs 2 pair. Hoyazo says he has 8 outs??!?! Try more like 17 outs on the turn. Yeah, he is the donk. 8 outs. Learn to count. No wonder Hoy thinks he runs bad he cant do simple math.

I made another 15k in chips when I flopped trips with 62 on a 66x board, turning quads before failing to get a value call on the river. But I quickly undid that, buying a little advertising when I allowed myself to get called down on the river with the hammer after having bet on the flop already

Waffles:Erm, they have seen you play. No Advertising necessary.

This only added to the general theme at the table that I was some kind of tiltmonkey, luckbox fishdonk.

Waffles:If this fin fits...

The big stack in the small blind reraised my 15k raise up to 45k. If I'm not suited and it's only heads-up I am likely to fold this hand in many situations, but with the hand being suited and the other guy being so, so deep, in no-limit I figured this is the kind of hand that I had to pay the price with

Waffles:Ya Jack Nine Donkey call. Wheeee. yeah cool.. someone re-raises your raise 3x and obviously you have to call because 78T is always gonna flop.

Ooooooooh. 2.2 million chips, with the turn of an Ace. On the turn.

Waffles:Thats usually where the turn happens Captain Redundant.

Needless to say, the rail exploded afresh there with my second suckout of the 10-hour tournament.

Waffles:Bad counting skillz. This is the point where I go on super monkey tilt as Hoyazo's post EXEEDED THE LIMIT ALLOWED BY GOOGLE READER!

which would have paid me 47k (first prize was slated to be 64k) and left $5100 for the three of us to play for. The shortest stack quickly accepted the deal, but after sitting for maybe a minute waiting for the other guy to accept, I grew impatient and decided to just play it out. Just like when I was in Vegas at the Venetian Deep Stack final table this summer, I am always in favor of a chop when luck has become a huge factor and we're down to the real big money, but I am most definitely not in favor of sitting around trying to convince someone to deal.

Waffles: Here we see Hoyazo lose 20K of equity due to arrogance and impatience. I knew there would be something good to read in this post.

It's just so wrong.

Waffles: lol dude you just called it 55-45 flip. How can it be "So Wrong?" Fucking lucksacks and their entitlement feelings makes me wanna puke.

So ends the recap of Hoyazo's run in the mini FTOPS.


Blogger konaforever said...

Best post evah!

1:30 PM

Blogger HighOnPoker said...

I feel like I need a Waffles Bashing Hoy Synopsis page.

1:30 PM

Blogger Bloody P said...

Classic. ClassicClassicClassic.

You should have titled it "The Ballad of Ace Rag".

2:02 PM

Blogger The Poker Meister said...

Have to say that you must have been reading my mind as I was reading the 53 printed pages I took to the bathroom as reading material to recap his tourney. I think you're overly harsh on the recap, but I did wind up running out of TP, so I used the 53 pages for my tushy.

2:30 PM

Blogger The Poker Meister said...

And I don't see the mention of the flopped top 2 vs. bottom pair suck -> resuck run bad complaint.

2:31 PM

Blogger lightning36 said...

You read it all? I can't even read all that you wrote!

4:51 PM

Blogger The Poker Meister said...

I am very happy for Hoy, but it was a bit overdone on the luck department.

6:14 PM

Blogger BamBam said...

Despite my natural homophobic tendancies, you're a little sexy to me right now.

It'll pass though.

6:57 PM

Blogger 23skidoo said...

Your Hoy hatery is legendary. I pray that he keeps it up, just so you can occasionally say what I think every time I read (skim) his posts.

8:07 PM

Blogger Rake Feeder said...

You made my day

8:54 PM

Blogger TraumaPoker said...

Since he didn't have time to recap his 0-5 NFL picks I think you should also do this for him. Thank you SIRF for providing this service for us.

10:59 AM

Blogger Fuel55 said...

Hoy and I are on a plane to Boston to beat the crap out of you.

6:40 PM

Blogger lj said...

this was awesome. i kept hoping you'd cover the bb defend w/ 92 to an utg raise, but nicely done regardless.

11:38 AM

Blogger Loretta8 said...

lol, awesome post, he might be the most delusional person on the internet, a title comparable to being the shortest midget or the sluttiest girl at the BunnyRanch

5:52 PM

Blogger jamyhawk said...

Gets my vote for Best Post of 2009!

6:46 AM


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