Monday, December 28, 2009

Christmas: Watch What You Ask For

Christmas time was great. The kids got new computers. There was happiness all around. I got the wife a watch. Not because I think she deserves anything good but because it made the kids happy. I got socks. Wheee! Actually I REALLY needed socks. Bigtime! Only pairs without any holes.

I set the girl up on email and she has been sending out emails like a mad hell spawn. Most of them are of the form - "Hi, I love you, SGirl". She scares me on computers. She has the inquisitive, hacker, mentality. This was demonstrated one day when she just randomly fired up You-Tube and started watching videos of boobies. She had no prior knowledge of You-Tube. She just kinda figured it out.

The boy got a full Warcraft set including his first two months. I thought this would be a cool idea. It is fun for the most part. He has taken to calling me "Fat" in game. So he will be like "Hey fat get your ass over here and mine some eggs with me". Um. I am bored of mining eggs and want to do my boring loremaster more. "@&#^@ YOU GET OVER HERE!". At one point he was spamming my chat with "COME NOW!". I counted a hundred before I got tired of counting. At least I am a bit closer to my NetherDrake.

Not all was bad though. A Warlock came down and ATTACKED my son without provocation. My son killed him like four times and he got killed like four times.

I came down with my death knight. I put the smackdown on that lock bigtime. Normally I will not camp anyone. I killed this guy 10x, then went and turned in my quest, then came back and killed him like 5 more times. He was a BAD warlock. When I attacked him his cast bar is like "Casting Immolate..". The Immolate spell does some damage but it takes two seconds to cast. For those who do not play Warcraft. Two. Seconds. Eternity. I would go in, wack him a few times, have my ghoul smack him, then as the Immolate was just about done casting I would spell silence him and finish off the job. I think he *MAY* have hit me once with something. He did not even try a single Howl of Terror. The Howl is a spell that causes everything around you to run away. It takes .8 seconds to cast and USUALLY is a Warlocks first attack before he dots you up and blows your face off with fire from hell. Needless to say it was quick and easy to kill this lock.

At the end we amused ourselves by singing "BOOM! BOOOM! FIYAHHH POWAHH!" when his Fire Mage blasted the lock or commenting on how nothing beat the smell of a dead lock. I have spawned a nerd family. Huzzzzzah!

The only other problem with the kids computer is IT IS BETTER THAN MINE!!! Fucking bastard comes down stairs and is like "Dude, your brokeback laptop has suck graphics and no sounds. You suck n000b!". I cried. I need a new computer. Now!!!!!


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