Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Tired, Bored, Waiting for Halloween

Authorities are investigating the death of a 17-year-old boy who died after officers in this St. Louis-area community shot him twice with a stun gun while he carried a Bible and cordless telephone, shouting "I want Jesus."

I do not get this story? He got what he was asking for right? So what is the problem?

I am thinking up ideas for my NaNoMoNovMinMo or whatever the hell that November writing thing is. I hate that name. Only because I am a retard and can not remember what it is. I am probably going to write something Sci-Fi / Fiction / Fantasy.. However so far my only ideas are:

1. A guy who has a sucky life plays WarCraft so much that he is actually sucked into the game by some mysterious forces and finds out it is not so much fun getting stabbed, beaten, and munched on in real life.

Not sure where I would take that but meh. I also might need a consult with some WoW fanatics like Hella of the multi-million dollar mansions since I am light on WoW experience.

2. A terrorist funds his attacks by playing low stakes poker on Party every night.

See First was right!!! Imagine how he blows up when someone sucks out, ehh? I do not know where that story would go either.

Ok. I am still in a morbid Halloween humor type mood so how about this.

The prosecution says some 180,000 Kurds were killed. Saddam and one other defendant are also charged with genocide.

Now I am no fancy pants lawyer dude like lets say Jordon but I think I would at least be able to get the charges reduced to attempted genocide. I mean if you could produce at least one Kurd it is not genocide right? Damn I am good! I should become a lawyer. I love to argue.

I think you probably saw this before but I think it is pretty aewsome. A haunted house all made out of Balloons except for the floor and ceiling. Neat!

How about some comments on your favorite scary movies? I personally get the most scared over the demon-ghost-devil-witch kind of genre. I think one of my favorite horror movies of all times is the Exorcist. Still scares the crap out of me. I amfascinatedd by all of those strange shows on TV too.

Ghost Hunters. Those guys do a VERY scientific investigation of houses that are supposed to be haunted. I have seen some creeeeepy shit on that show. I think the lighthouse show was the best but when they went and investigate Stanley Hotel some spooky shit happened. For those of you who do not know the name this was the Hotel used in the filming of the Shining. Also one of my favorite horror movies although the book was slightly better. They are doing a "Live" investigation tonight at 11PM on SciFi. Should be fun. Apparently there is going to be internet interraction with home users being able to hit the "Panic Button" if they see anything. Interesting concept. I like this show the best because it is the one you canbelievee is real the most.

A Haunting. This show scares the crap out of me. It is on discovery channel and I have no idea why I find it scary. It is in the genre that tends to scare me: I.E. Ghosts-Demons that do bad shit. The stories are just recounts from people and I am sure they are hyped up for the show. While you can not put any worth into the accounts it still is pretty scary and I can not get enough of it.

Most Haunted. Now this is the worse show of the lot. I hate this show. It is basically some stupid people going around and screaming and being idiots. I highlyrecommendd not seeing this show. Unless you like funny things.. like one episode the psychic pretends to be a spirit of a guy who hates women and slugs his co-host. I mean he really attacked her. It was funny. I hardly ever watch this show and it is just wayyy too fake even for me.

I know I am opening myself up for a serious can of pain here but does anyone have any real spooky things that happened to them? Post a comment.. I love Halloween stories! Ougie boards, ghosts, hauntings.. bring it baby!

That is all I have for now. Peace. Ok. I will probably have more after lunch. It is one of those days.


Not much going on here.. Won my second Fantasy Football game against the non-Blogger this week. I scored a whole 19 points! Whoo hoo! Worst score in my entire season but I win. Go figure.

I played some Razz and Stud-8 last night. I won at both. It is alot of fun playing games where you can basically tell what your opponent has. JJ and Trauma came by to play Razz for a while too. Trauma busted out. I had alot of fun with JJ. He kept getting Queens so much that everytime before the hand was dealt I would type into chat "QQ for JJ! QQ for JJ!".. It was sooooo funny how many times a Queen would pop up for the guy. He is on the downside of bad variance right now for sure so go by and give him a big hug!!!

Saturday, October 28, 2006

The Grind: A Warriors Story

A long time ago in what seems like a galaxy far far away I was a grinder. I would even say I might have been the king of the grinders. I bought into my favorite poker site for $50 and I started playing the .25/.50 game. I devoured blogs and poker books like a succubus on prom night and my game got good or at least lucky. I quickly spiraled up the LHE grinder bandwagon to the 1/2 and 2/4.. the bankroll grew. It did not grow in huge leaps like an MTT win allows but slowly over time like a well tended garden. Of course even back then there were signs of weeds. Eventually I drove my bankroll up over the 3K mark. I was on fire. It had taken a year of very hard word. I spent many hours on the felt and finally made it to the point where I could make money that could actually effect my life in a positive way. I brought myself up to the 5/10 game and finally faltered. It did not happen overnight. I ended up not being able to take the large swings at the 5/10 game and eventually in one colossal night I blew 3G's playing until 5AM in the morning. It was the last time I could grind.

It felt really bad losing control like that in one night. Sleeping that night was difficult mostly because of that voice that kept calling me an idiot. It was not entirely surprising as there had been other nights where I had escalated upwards in levels to chase my loses. Eventual it was probably destined to happen. After a short time I jumped back on the bandwagon but it was never the same. I think in a way for the past few years I have been continuing to chase my loses. Trying to get back to the pinnacle of my early success not in the way I originally did it but by the quick fix. I have been trying to hit the lottery and get lucky instead of using fundamental strong poker skills and bankroll management to earn my way there. I have had some amount of success in doing this but nothing stable. The best I can say is I am actually slightly ahead of the game which is better than the alternative.

So in that vein I have decided to return to my roots and build a bankroll the right way. I started with $75 for a bankroll and since the lowest level of poker I can play is .25/.50 that is what I am doing. I am eeaking out a few BBs a night and trying to watch my bankroll steadily grow. I have decided to not play any MTT unless I have earned 4x the buyin from grinding first. I am keeping track of the cap levels on a spreadsheet so I know when I can actually play an MTT. Right now I am saving up for the Mookie on Full Tilt this Wednesday.

All in all I think what this accomplishes is twofold. First it makes me play poker for the sake of playing poker. The money does not matter. It is all nickle and dimes right now. The things that matter are playing a good game, improving, and staying in my limit. I may "hit" the lottery with some of my hard earned winnings and give myself a boost to the next level but if I do not I am sure I will get there slowly and surely. By forcing discipline into the way I play I think my whole attitude about the game will come back into line.

The plan for making money right now is to stick to the slightly higher skilled games. I will be playing Limit Omaha-8, Limit Stud-8 and Razz on Full Tilt. I think I am too close to Limit Holdem to attempt that right now. I also do not want to play higher variance games like 25/NLHE until the bankroll gets alot larger. I have no idea if I actually have the ability to grind anymore. I may have lost it all those years back but if I want to be successful at this game I need to find out and I intend to.

Friday, October 27, 2006

I love Halloween

It has got to be my favorite holiday. Check out these spoooooky attractions across the nation. My favorite:

4. Fright Dome in Las Vegas : Michael Jackson has visited in previous years. Aside from that? You'll find 20 rides that'll make it worth every penny. Be sure to pay the all-new Zombie Mansion a friendly visit. Take it from Micheal this one's guaranteed to be a thriller.

Anyplace you might run into Michael Jackson in the dark has to be fucking scary.

Pretty coool..

Check this out. Pretty nice way to find the Casino nearest to you that has a Poker room.


In this case, it involves robots who are powerful and have laser guns (okay, it's a Transformers fan fic =P What I have so far is here if anyone wants to see). But I've also thrown in some characters who are cat people and they're generally fast and agile, not too physically strong--they have guns too, but they also use more traditional weapons (staffs, etc.). But it's not robots vs. cat people--there are people of both races on each side.
-- NaNoWriMo Genius

What the fuck did I signup for? I figured I might kill some time and try and write something beside the blog. I used to actually have some desire to be writer.. like in sixth grade.. Oh well we will see where it goes.

Top Ten Supporters of Waffles

I figure it is not all bad. A lot of people have provided tremendous amounts of support over the years and they deserve a shoutout. If I fail to mention you it is because your part of the tenth group. Really I appreciate you all.

10. All the Little People Over the years of busting out bankroll after bankroll and even making a small profit all of the little people have always been there. A kind word. A buyin to an MTT anything to get me back on my feet. I even had someone sponsor me in part for the million on stars. These people who believe in me and pony up every once in a while are much appreciated.

9. CarmenSinCity
Carmen is the best. She is always there with her perky boo.. smile and great personality. She was the first one to grab me in Vegas and sign us up for the 1/2 wait list as Carmen and Waffles! She even spotted me a couple buyins for 25/NL when a blogger game was starting up. I eventually paid her back with some interest but it was a stretch for her bankroll and I appreciated it a lot. I just wish I could have paid her back a lot more.

8. Fluxer
This dude needs to get a life or at least a job. He is always on the girlie chat and
willing to talk poker and strategy. I think he is probably the blogger who has watched me play the most. Although his style is unorthodox it really made me think about alternate ways of playing poker which is EXTREMELY important. I always get a chuckle when someone spouts off a Super System line to explain why they think a player has a certain hand. In most cases they are right. However if you know your opponent is a Super System thinker you can outplay him by making your hand look a certain way to them. In the long run this is what makes a winning player. Manipulating your opponents and playing in such an erratic way that they can never get a read on you. Although I always tell him he needs to tone it down a little I think everyone can benefit from having a little Fluxer in their game.

7. YoSoyVeneno
Although we have not been chatting it up alot lately Veneno has been a great supporter of me. Our days of playing the 1$/3$ MTTs on Party Poker were incredibly fun. Since she has gone single and is spending all of her time with Slb and the Calli Boys I have not seen as much of her as I used to. I guess my tilt factor probably is happy about that as she can insta tilt me with her style of play. Hopefully we will hook up again soon for some HU style play or something.

I have no idea why he is on the list. I can point to nothing he has done to improve my game or to help me out. He probably should have made the detractor list, but when a guy says he is willing to go through the gates of hell for you he has to make the list. He actually gets a lot of what I am doing here. It is always fun to waste countless corporate dollars reading his blog or chatting with him on the IM. He is one of the NL cash game guys I have come to respect.

5. MiamiDon
Don is the guy I look to lately to keep my game solid. He is always willing to share his thoughts on the NL cash game and takes a real grinders approach to it. I look forward to playing 2/5NL and above live someday soon and when that happens a lot of it will be because Don re-reignighted my interested in the NL cash game. He has a lot to teach about actually making a living playing Poker and I soak up as much as I possibly can.

Although Al and I joke a lot I know that he has a lot of respect for my game. He is really like the Big Brother I never had. I appreciate his camaraderie and everything his has given to make the Blogger community a better place. One of these days I am going to sit down and get that SoCo that bastard owes me!!

3. Dr. Pauly
Dr. Pauly is made to be a public figure. The fucker is one of the most personable people you will ever meet in your pathetic life. I have never seen anyone who just shines the way that he does. Over the years we have played a lot of Poker together. The early Party Poker Blogger games were my first introduction to NLHE and were the most fun I ever had playing poker. Not only because I got to bust April multiple times either. I popped my live play cherry with the good Doctor and have made some decent money in his MTTs. Although his JetSet lifestyle does not allow me to have a lot of time with him I appreciate everything he has done to help my game and gladly consider him a friend.

2. Iggy BlogFather
I can not say enough about this guy. He may clown around and goof off a lot but if you
have never had a serious poker conversation with him then you are missing out. He does not give you the answers he just leads you in the right direction and has you make your own conclusions. I have learned a lot about poker from the guy and have benefited from his support. I really appreciate everything he has done.

1. All the Loyal Readers
You all can be asshole and get on my nerves a lot but without you this blog does not
continue. I write in part for myself and in part for all of you. The blog and the poker game keep feeding off each other.. and if I become successful at this game one day it will be because of the blog and all of the readers that are willing to comment, chat, and give up valuable time for me. I could list a whole bunch of you but I do really appreciate each and every one of you. You keep this train wreck going and that symbiotic parasitic relationship is what makes it so great.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Top Ten Waffles Bashers

Now before you all get your panties in an uproar this is being done as a fun lookback on some of the more interesting comments made about me over the years. It does not mean I do not think you worship me because I know you all do.

10. GoBeRude DuggleBugger
Now you would think that DuggleBugger would be my #1 arch nemesis but this is not true. He only rates a measley ten because he likes yelling at everyone.

SirFWALGMAN can barely write at all, but he manages to spit out some very entertaining stuff for someone with no better than 3rd grade english skills. He posts A LOT, so you will sometimes see three or four posts a day from the guy, and then hear nothing for three days. Just when you're afraid someone has hit him in the head and left him for dead in a ditch, he comes back like nothing happened. It's great stuff.
-- DuggleBugger Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Our relationship goes back a long ways though. Sometimes I can even find some nice things he has said about me. It almost makes me want to tear up.

I started reading SirF because he was incredibly prolific. He would post three or four times per day, and it was pretty entertaining stuff. He has slowed down since he busted out in DAZZLING fashion. I still read his stuff and enjoy playing with him at the Party Poker tables, because he's a great guy who loves to talk about poker. He's one of the good guys.
-- DuggleBugger Thursday, March 31, 2005

Of course he did predict my demise a little bit early. I am a stubborn bastard.

Sir wiffle waffle is the easiest to criticize. He disappeared! I guess he quit playing, which might be a good idea considering the roller coaster ride his poker play was. It was fascinating to watch the highs and lows, but it was like watching "Titanic." As interesting as the subplots were, we knew it wasn't going to end well.
-- DuggleBugger Thursday, August 18, 2005

All in all despite the fact that I think his 3rd grade English teacher raped him and everytime he rammed it in his little asshole he said "It's THEIR DAMMIT! NOT THERE!!!!" I have no real problem with guys who speak their minds.

Slob is a newcomer to the scene. We have had alot of fun yelling at each other in chat. Not all of it has been on his side either. I mean who could forget the blowup I had at him recently? I think he intends to take over the mantle of the crazyman if I ever give it up. Alot of his posts remind me of a crude less lovable version of me.

8. Trauma Poker
That wise ass comment you posted gets you a number eight spot baby. Trauma is a fun guy. I love playing MTTs with him because he is ALWAYS fucking up when he has big leads. For those of you who have not seen his quote I have republished it in full below. I am so glad I played "The Big Game".

21:29EST 1 minute to Blogger Big Game
PG2-“Hey the Blogger Big Game is starting in 1 minutes, we need to mess with this one FOR SURE”
PG1-“Indeed. Give me a roll call, who we got playing?”
PG2-“Smokkee, slb, blinders, kat, sirfwalgman,….”
PG1-“SIRF!! It’s almost too easy, let’s get him”
PG2-“He has his entire FTP bankroll on the line I don’t know if I want to screw him that bad, how about a bad beat as chip leader at the final table and he just slips into the money?”
PG1-“No lets bubble him.”
PG2-“That is too obvious bubbling him is getting old….wait I got it! Let’s get him out on the FIRST HAND!!”
PG1-“That’s sick, I like it, but sick. Who should give the benefit of the early double up to?”
PG2-“How about smokkee?”
PG1-“No he just took down 5K at Commerce he doesn’t need extra chips. I say kat or CC from pokerworks.”
PG2-“OK heads CC, tails kat call it in the air”
PG2-“It’s heads, you always lose coin flips!! CC it is hope he enjoys this….”
- Trauma Poker, Recently

7. SirALCantHang
Now Al has said many unkind things to me over the years but since I know he has forgotten most of them because of loss of brain cells I think all he can really rate is spot seven. Keep trying though big boy, I know you have it in you. He has put out numerous bounties on my head including the most recent on in the last Mookie.

If someone can bust SirWaffles then I will pay their next entry into the Mookie, and if they can do it with a massive suckout I will pay the next two!!!
-- AlCantHang - Last Mookie, BTW you Owe TexasKaty!

Al mostly is here not because of any discouraging remarks he has made but because he fucking beats me in everything except Poker. It is like that big brother I never had and thank the fuck I never will. We compete in video games, and map entries and all kinds of things and he always wins. Dispite this Al is one of the best guys I know.

6. Mr. Dreamy

How can you take a guy who has fucked women in every 3rd world country in the world, and beat up more fuggly looking poker kids in backroom games than anyone calling you a pussy? It hurts man. Scott is a man's man. He was this close this weekend to throwing a guy to a bunch of Mexicans and fucking his girlfriend. I love this guy! One day I will earn his respect. Help me daddy.

Quit crying you little bitch. Insert your tampon and stop the bleeding. If it went the other way I would be reading about your great play. What are you doing committing all your chips on the first hand of a tournament anyway? Fuck the read you had you always know there is a luck factor out there if you have anything less than the stone cold nuts. You are playing against BLOGGERS!!!! people that regularly shove mounds of chips in against each other with the worst starting hand in poker. Now shut up, suck it up, let your testis drop again and be a man...
-- Mr. Dreamy

5. Biggestron

Who could forget the Byyyyronnnn Incident. Last time I tell a guy with a sissy name that he has a sissy name. Ooops.

4. Absenthine

He gets an honerary mention for enjoying my bustout in "The Big Game".

3. Drizztzzccktt

Drizz is actually the guttersnipe of the comments section. He rarely comes out on his blog and says anything bad about me but I can count on him to be the first person to mention me negatively in any comments section of any blog anywhere in the Blogsphere. I think he thinks he is helping me or something. Ahh well.

Will they have Blackjack in the upper right hand corner for Waffles?
Drizztdj - Thursday, June 08, 2006

2. Chris Halverston
Where the hell has that fucker gone to? He used to be one of the Major players doing it old school with his grinding at LHE. He was a great help in getting me started blogging. I probably would never have kept this blog up this long if not for him. I give him the coveted number two spot because I firmly beleive he started the monkier
of Waffles! Bastard!

1. Felicia Lee
Felicia and I have known each other for a while and she is another person who I respect because she tells you how she feels. She does not pussy foot around. She will always be number one on this list though. If it is not for trying to get me to quit poker (which might actually be a favor), or calling me names.

You should quit poker.
-- Felicia Lee - Kicking me when I am down

You look like a serial killer, btw. Charles Manson has nothing on you
-- Felicia Lee

She is giving me nice awards like the worst blog in this universe or any other parrellel universe. I wish I could find that post. I think she may have *cough* archived it? heh.

One of my biggest regrets in Vegas was not spending more time with her. You get caught up in the whirlwind of meeting everyone and you just can not fit everything in. So here is to hoping she keeps on my case for years to come.

Honestly this was kind of fun to do. I always enjoy reading about myself of course. I found it surprising that there actually was very little negativity out there about me. I guess you all do reall love me. *sniff*.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

TexasKat and a Final Table

Well I finally hit a final table. I was doing well too. I think I maybe made a too soft laydown. TexasKat had been pushing alot and I had KJs. She limped and then pushed. Now to me that might be a small pocket pair or something. So do you call off your remaining stack against her push with KJs knowing she is very aggressive and is likely to push with a wide range of hands? I am actually interested in knowing what she had. I finally went out to her when I made a bad decision with second pair when she flopped top two pair with J4o. Ahh well. I think it was a terrible decision on my part because even second pair weak kicker beats me.

Final tables are tough. People push all in (and maybe rightfully so) with all kinds of crap. Jo (rightly so) raised me all in with A7o. I had barely a stack behind me after my semi-steal bet and had to call with QTo. I got lucky and hit a ten. So since there is so much amped aggression even from a great player like Jo is KJs a bad call in 4th? Almost any two cards can work. What is the skill and where do you get your edge here? Interesting questions to ponder. Until then may the Push Monkeys be with you!

Improbability Probability theorem of Poker

I have been hard at work figuring out the Improbability Probability theorem of Poker. What the advanced theory of poker expounds is the fact that online poker sites want to cause you the most pain possible. Not everyone at the table. Just you. The reason the Poker software algorithms work this way is simple. It really encompasses three reasons.

I. Most people are fucking lazy

It is true. Have you not seen how many fat bitches are in the grocery store buyin six boxes of donuts. Is it because they like donuts? No. It is because they do not have to cook donuts. The lazy fucks. Walking through the aisles is the most exercise most Americans get in a week. The whole fucking country is full of obese fat asses that do not want to work hard.

So in relation to the poker world, again, most of you are lazy fat fucks. You all want to win at poker but will not put in the time to read, play, analyze, and just learn to improve your game.

Even you guys who scanned through Super System once about five years ago.. yeah, I am talking to you.. so stop feeling so superior. You know you stopped learning after you closed that book. You figured you had it all down. Your lazy fucks who do not want to learn anything.

Lazy fucks are Donkeys and if the majority of players are lazy fucking donkeys then obviously the software will created more interest and playability, AKA, RAKE, if it rewards these fat fucks.

II. It is Amusing

So you have all these fat fuck donkeys playing wacked cards and getting paid off. The software realizes that the more painful the beat on the other guy the more amused you will be. Admit it. You LOVE it when TJo goes all in against AA and spikes his runner-runner straight on the river. It just glues you to the screen to see who is going to get fucked next. I bet you could fold every hand and just watch and read the chat and be amused. Who has not been amused by the comments? #**(#*(@ Ass Monkey! How the fuck could you call with 23o??!?!?!!?. It is worth the price of the rake and the software knows this. It is watching you. It is waiting. It entertaining you for a reason.

III. We all like pity

The game also knows that the good players are not going to quit because they think they are better then everyone else. Even though they are really only going to win with that monster hand 3-4 times for every loss when they do lose they can feel superior to the donkeys. In addition they are boosted by other good players sitting in the dark in their spiderman underoos moaning about how they were bad beat out of the Full Tilt 25K when that donkey did this. It is like the brotherhood of the miserable. It is like fucking crack cocaine. Everyone wants to be pitied and comforted and the software knows this is enough to keep you putting your quarters in.

Improbability Strategy
So in order to fight this insidious AI you must throw out everything you know about poker and do some level seventy-six thinking. Instead of thinking what does player A think I have and what does he think I think he has. Some solid old school thinking there. Look at the flop and say "What do I know player A has and what would be the most painful probable outcome for a player on the board.". So lets get into some real world examples. I was practicing this theory a little while ago and even though in needs some adjustments I am sure I am on to something.

Hand Example I:
Ok. The guy in EP is a real tightass and will never raise unless he has big pocket pairs. So the tighwad raises and you look down and see J5o. Of course you call here. You will never get a better chance to make someone cry and the AI knows this. The flop comes 592. The EP guy bets the pot. Now here is where it gets good. You know you are behind. However you know the most painful outcome would be to STACK this guy with J5o vs his AA. The AI does not reward being a pussy as that is no fun at all. So at this point you have only one move: INSTA PUSH. Obviously the guy in this 10$ MTT is never going to fold aces here so he calls. The AI kicks in and rewards you with a jack on the turn and rubs it in real good with a 5 on the river. The least probable thing has happened and you have screwed your opponent. See how it works?

Hand Example II:
You have all limped. The flop comes 3-spades and there are 5 players. You have the king and queen of spades. The guy in EP bets, you raise, the third guy pushes. Now you need to put these guys on hands. The first guy obviously has some sort of top pair hand.. you flopped the second highest flush. The third guy, if he is playing good improbability theory has A3o with an Ace of spades. SO your only move here is to fold. Of course the guy with TP calls and the turn gives Ax guy his nut flush. See. It is easy.

So remember.. it is not always going to be you who loses. It is REALLY important to make the good reads and figure out who is going to be hurt the most in the hand. If you can not put your opponents on hands then you can not figure this out. If you need some more proof either try this in one of your 5-10$ MTTs or go read Ick as he has started down the path of the dark side of the force. Us forward thinkers are always on the same page. As he has found out the more amusing the beat you can put on someone the more the AI is likely to make that outcome happen as it is +EV for the entire table. I will be giving more real world examples from some future MTTs I play in. If you would like to donate to the research of improbability probability then make all donations payable to SirFWALGMan on Full Tilt. Please send me a note if you wish to use your donation for any specific MTT testing as it is unclear if this theory works at all levels. If the donk quotient goes down then it is possible that the +EV move for the AI is just to let things play out normally. This is a very unclear path of the theorem and will need further investigation.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Blame CC

If you get bored at work because I dont post for the next month it is all CC's fault. Fucker pushed in on the first hand of the "Big Game" with a 30% favorite hand and sucked out on me. Good job man. Those pair of tens are a great push in a deep stack on the very first hand. Nice flush though. Figures I flop a monster set on the first hand of the game. Make the right read that he does not have a flush and lose to his all in push with a pair of tens and an Ace high flush draw. Not sure what chance I had in this but would have been alot of fun to play more than one hand.

Oh and thanks for being amused at my misforture Absinthine.. It really gave me alot more respect for you. Glad you lasted two more spots than me. Although I really meant it when I said I hoped you bubbled.

Friday, October 20, 2006

All in Baby.. All in..

If you have not signed up for the big game take my lead and do it! I am doing it full Waffles style putting my remaining $75 on Full Tilt into the pot. Send me home crying and I will not be playing poker for another month or so. Last night was pretty average.. Lost a buyin at 50/NL in a combination of bad play and running into 4 sets of sets. Something like that. I played a little LHE too for the heck of it.. after running my buyin up 3x I ran into the monster T6, 6 on the flop, my TPTK was no good even when I raised the flop because that ten on the turn burned me. I ran into a few sets here too. Including one hand where I was raising and re-raising all the way through and got rivved. I am not sure I played any hand here too badly.. just was not in the cards for me. I still find TPTK the hardest hand to play in LHE. Too strong to just check down to the river and too weak to stand up alot of the time. See you all Sunday Night!

I have also been thinking of expanding out my media empire and trying some live video blogging on You-Tube. Nothing original mind you.. just a night of cards with Waffles.. I think it might be an amusing pastime.. It also might surprise people to see how I REALLY play. Still in the "I am too lazy to do this" phase but we will see.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Around the world..

People seem to be less and less tollerant. Like would this bother you? I mean cmon ladies, it is not like your ever going to use them.. am I right? How the heck did this chick see them anyway? Perv.

How about this? Is this a plot from the Atlantians? No, not those ones, these ones. Are they training killers to come after us?

How about this little broo ha ha? As you learned in my last Spice Girls post: I am not black. However does that really offend anyone? I mean it is not like he was saying "Hey you my slave boy!".. He made a perfectly acceptable english statement.. why would this offend anyone? When has this asshole ever worked a real day in his life anyways? Fucking rich guy probably tells the spanish maid to suck his dick or he will deport her. The real truth is it probably did not but you can never pass up a chance for free publicity.

I also hear through the grapevine that Netteller is giving up on US residents. So it may soon be a wee bit hard to get funds in. This should be a good motivation for you to improve your game. Have a nice day.

Holy shit! I am getting one of these!!! When they are ready at least. I need a +5 cloak of invisability to go with my +4 vorpel blade.

Fuckit since I went there I might as well link to these two interesting articles. Watch out Hella!

Fuck it since I am on a roll.. I got a kick out of this. Next time you think your luck is bad watch this.

What has changed..

I was contemplating why I have had trouble winning a Mook lately.. It is an interesting question.. Sure I could blame it on bad cards and all that, and there has been some of that, but I think I became a cash game player. Ick. What a nasty thing to be.

I was once told by the noble and obnoxious Felicia, Who btw, I love, and respect a hell of a lot, that I would make a GREAT MTT player because of my fearless and reckless nature. She also said I should quit Poker but we can ignore that for the moment.

I have been thinking about the differences between cash games and MTTs and it all comes down to the fact that in a cash game you can wait. You can rebuy. Although you do need to have some of that fearless nature and live by your guts and reads you also in some ways have a margin for error.

In the MTTs we all play it is totally different. Once your out that is it. Cya. Go Away. Take you ball and kiss my ass. It does not really matter how you lost your chips it just matters that you did. So when someone makes you decide for your entire tourney it is a much harder choice. The longer into the game you go the harder the choice is.

I think some of the best plays I made last night.. and the ones not by coincidence that got TO the final table were good, solid, bluffs at the right time in the right place. My two favorites of the night were against AlCanPlayWithHisCardsUpCauseThatsHowGoodIAmAtReadingHim. He made a semi-bluff steal of 2400 when we were down at the final table and I pushed all in against him with of all cards T8o. On the bubble. That move took balls. I read him for a steal. I also knew he was of the Cult of the Lady who Folds alot and had the skill to let a hand go. He later did a simular raise but I read correctly he had a monster and let him have my blind. He was my P@WN last night. It was kind of fun.

I have really cut alot of bluffing and stealing out of my game. I have played solid poker and in my last few Mookies it has done nothing for me. I have gotten chip leads fairly early on, but by the time the blinds hit 400/800 I would allow myself to be blinded out. Being in first place for 3/4ths the tourney is NOT my goal. My goal also is not to make a few bucks at the end of a five hour marathon tourney. My goal is to go deep and win first in every single Mookie I can.

Every single MTT you play that lasts over an hour is going to have a period of time when you have hot cards and a period of time when you are card dead. If your not willing to take caculated risks at these dead times and do a little stealing or re-stealing it does not matter how well you play the rest of the game. You will be a loser.

One good example I saw last night that really inspired me.. and beleive me I NEVER thought I would say this about him.. was when NewInNov lost a big pot and was chipped down to 4Kish on the bubble. He immediatly fired his entire stack twice against the blinds in LP. I am pretty sure (and he probably can verify) that he did not have two monsters.. but he knew in this situation with the bubble approaching he could make a couple of moves, chip up 4K, and be in better shape for a while. It was very good. Very aggressive Poker and it worked.

So next time I play a Mook I am going to be a little bit more of a wildman. Add a little crazy shizzzahhh into my game and see what happens. I may donk out early but I think I will be able to extend my early lead into a monster chip stack and take down one of these mofo's finally. My finishes lately have been in the last two tables and I have been chip leader most of the last two Mooks. I think a few adjustments will get me over the hump.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Double Mookie Fucked

44 was my killer tonight. Bubbled in the Mook #1 when Astin called my all in with 44 (Even stacks, I had him covered by 800 or so).. and I flopped a flush draw, and 6 outs for over cards.. then my 15 outs improved to 18 outs when I added a gutshot on the turn.. but alas it was not to be.. Bad Call? Not sure. He had a small stack so it was not the worse thing in the world to gamble I guess.. and he could have always hit his 4.. Did I need to push here? I think so. While 7th would have been nice I needed chips to try and take a shot at first.

44 killed me in the second try too.. I raise JJ in ep.. and a guy with 44 decides much like Astin to push. Of course he caught his 4 on the flop and I went out in 10th place.
Crappy night. I ended up taking a 17$ profit off the cash tables even after my buyin so that was good I guess..

I really do not have enough luck to win an MTT. I should just quit forever.

Three good things happened during the MTT though:

1. Love Elf Called me Fugly but begged me for something. Nothing more attractive than a woman begging a fugly guy.
2. IronGirrrllll said and I quote "Take me down Waffles!", I still have a woody over that!!!
3. I bluffed AlCantHang off a huge pot with the Mook! WOOT!


Where the fuck is Ick?

Congrats to Jewels on her last ever for now WWDN. She did g00t. Only outlasted by a drunken-aggro dwarf, a Weak Playah, and some other donk I do not really know.

I started thinking about writing about why I took a little time off from the online poker game and it probably deserves a full post but I am not really in the mood. If you read my posts back in April I had finally achieved "Poker nirvana". I know it is hard to believe. I was totally at peace with my game. If I got rivved or killed when way ahead then so be it. It is POKER. I was at total peace with the nature of the game. I think it is important to have this attitude.. not just say you have it. It also is something that can come and go. Lately I had lost my mojo.. Culminating in a nice set of rants which ended with slagging off a really nice person: Joanne. I really do not want to feel that way about poker so I have basically been playing a lot less in the past few months.

It has been a pretty decent year for me Poker wise. I still have not attained that little place where you actually make money that means something. However I have booked in a 1K profit from Online play, around 600 for live.. and even a nice little 1K advertising bonus. All of this has been cashed out. So while I have not and may never reach the success I think I can at least I am not losing.

Anyhoooo.. I hit the tables at Full Tilt again this week with a whole $50 bankroll!! WHOO HOO! I really want to play in the Big Game this week. For those of you not in the "Cool Kids" club.. Don has setup a game for this Sunday. NLHE Double Stacks. 9:30PM. Password: donkey. The buyin for this even is $75, hence the name "The Big Game". It is the largest buyin home-game on the "Blogger" circuit and it will be interesting to see who shows up.

So what do I decide to play with my $50? You guessed it 50/NL!! WOO HOO!. Sorry they do not have blackjack on Full Tilt yet. I have played a conservative but aggressive game this week and had some interesting ways to win. I pulled off a few huge bluffs on the first night.. to get my stack up a bit, then cracked someone with QJs. I flopped TPTK and felt I was ahead. The turn brought a 5 of spades so I had a flush draw and my TPTK. The other guy pushed in for $16 more into a $20 pot so it was pretty easy to call.. but I felt I was ahead.. He turned over A5o and I held up. I took a few good stands like that but when is a call a "Good Read" and when do you just get lucky you were actually ahead? Interesting question.

I had MiamiDon on the IM while I was playing and it was VERY interesting to hear his thoughts. He is a cash game player and his thinking is totally different than mine. The hand in question I have AK out of position with one raise before me. I re-raise with my AK which is something I hardly ever do. He cold calls.

Now to me my raise says I have a big pocket pair and his call says he has something speculative like AK/AJ/TT/99 something in that range.. The flop comes Qxx. I bet out just about pot and he cold calls. The pot is now twelve bucks. I see his call as being weak.. so I fire a pot size bet on the turn when another Queen falls.. he thinks for a bit and folds like a little girl.

MiamiDon said his take on the hand is my re-raise means I have a weak hand like AK.. and that if it was him playing he would cold call me with AA/KK in that situation and then outplay me on the flop and turn to extract a lot of money. In my opinion my re-raise meant I had a really strong hand and my two bets backed that up. I am not a big fan of bluffing at these levels but I wonder if our difference in opinions on what hands the other guy had and what I was representing was a cash vs MTT mentality or a 50/NL vs 200/NL game mentality. Any thoughts?

Last night I played 50/NL again with my now much improved 100$ bankroll and again doubled up. No real skill there. I flop a set. Guy bets into me hard. I turn a boat. Guy pushes on me. Guy flips over AJ on a AQQx board to be drawing dead. Now I have a MASSIVE 150$ bankroll. Wow I am cool. heh.

** Word of caution: Any newbies reading this please do not play 50/NL on a 50$ bankroll.. you should at the very least have $500 and probably more.. you will probably read about how I blew it all in the near future.

So I am bankrolled for the Big Game this weekend for the moment.. and I am also going to hit up the Mookie tonight. If you have not been it is a blast. AlCantHang has taken it under his wing to get eighty people there!!! Go help the ole' drunkard out and show up dammit!

Last but not least, is anyone interested in showing up at Foxwoods in November? I am all for the 18th if it works out better for most people.. right now it is basically me and Jordon circle jerking each other which while somewhat interesting is not exactly what I had in mind. Where the hell did BoneDaddy go? Does he have a job? I thought for sure he was coming. I guess he got gaped in some Atlantic City alleyway and is too sore to sit down and read my blog. So if you interested in going to Foxwoods in November post a comment. It should be fun.

Monday, October 16, 2006

The Absurdity of the Universal Hatred of All things Waffles AKA Proof that there is a Supreme Being and He hates me AKA I can use big words too

I often will ruminate about the universally proven certitude that I have the most contretemps of luck of anyone since Romeo and Juliet forfeit their chance at true love. You often hear me contemplate on how my extraordinarily favorite hands are subjugated repeatedly. You probably chortle and declare "Waffles is descending down the precipitous cliff into to maw of insanity once more.". I now have proof positive that the Universe is controlled by a sentient being and this living soul despises me with a ardor that rivals any known to humanity throughout the eternity of time. I make the presentation of this substantiation of evidence so you can settle upon at your altar, shrine, or vestibule of worship and offer up burning pictures of yours truly in order to gain benediction from this deity. All of you with agnosticism in your hearts should be compelled to hearken to this with much haste least you be stricken down with plague and despair unknown to any since Dante's Inferno. The proof is simple in its presentation and yet infinitely complex in it's nefariousness. Alas I offer up unto you the proof I have been foretelling in this short post: Chicago 10, Arizona 23. I will leave it up to your inherent ingenuousness to calculate the side of the wager I was on. Least you need any more proof as soon as I finished spending untold hours upon this post the Bears made a tremendous comeback from the brink of oblivion and were victorious. Touché All Knowing One, Touché.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Flushed down the drain

Finally had a losing session at Foxwoods. Was bound to happen eventually. Not too much excitement in the night. The hand that did me in was when I had $200 sitting on the table. I was on my second buyin after I put an aggro guy all in with QQ, but the guy behind me woke up with KK.. Seeing as the flop was all low cards this was probably not a hand I was going to get away from at Foxwoods.

I was playing with a REALLY BAD REALLY LUCKY guy. He had beaten me earlier to take away some of the profit I had made. I flopped TPTK and figured I was ahead. He pushed for around fourty more when I bet out and I just KNEW I was ahead.. So I called. I was right. He had pushed his entire $100 stack in with an OESD which he made on the river. He had called my $15 raise pre-flop with J5o and flopped an OESD. Well played moron. One thing I will say.. I respect the fact he made a move at the pot here.

So this sets up our next hand a while later. I flop top pair and lead out with a twenty. I see two hearts on the boatd. I get called by Mr. ChaseIt and the turn gives me two pair and kills any odds for a flush draw. So I push in another eighty. He of course calls and when the heart hits the river I know I have lost. He turns over J4h for the winning hand. Where the first hand he had made a play at a pot the second hand was just an example of the worse kind of poker ever. I want that call every day of the week and twice on Sunday.

I never was able to mentally recover from that and ended up pissing away my last buyin with TPTK and a gutshot vs a flopped straight that pushed. In some ways it was not a bad call as I think half the table called this guys all in. It was a very loose player and I did not think I was that far behind. I ended up hitting two pair but it was no good against the ass end straight. Oh well. All in all a very dissapointing night.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Who you wanna be? Who you really wanna be?

Unlike all of the un-edumicated bloggers who have decided to enter the Spice Girl contest I have put my substantial brainpower to work and researched all of the Spice Girls to decide which one I would want to be. After a long and arduous fifteen minutes I have come up with the following analysis.

My initial leanings were towards Posh. She seems like the coolest of the Spice Girls. Posh was looking pretty good especially since she seems to be the overall most talented of the group, until I learned I would have to give birth to three freaking kids with some sweaty not-football player. Screw that hippie! Next!

I thought Scary spice might be a good choice as I have always wondered what it would be like to be black. Would I be discriminated against? My initial white bread raising leads me to believe that all people are treated equally. I have however recently had the good fortune of working with a brotha and it really opened my eyes to how little we have accomplished in the past century of “equal” rights. I could go into all of the incidents he faced on a daily basis in America but I only have a few hundred words here. However I saw the picture of her I included and that quickly changed my mind. If I have to look like that for even a second I would rather die. Although it is tempting to have a Nevisian father I am going to have to pass.

Baby Spice was a tough one. I mean I get to have that body. I do not think I would ever go out. Actually maybe I would.. but only to the local Lesbo bar to pickup a few girls for a little paaaartaaayyy. She is such a hotty. She appears to have no substance whatsoever which is perfect for me. The only downside is I have to sleep with Justin Timberlake. Ick.

A UN Ambassador, a stripper and has posed nude in magazines.. Ginger Spice has done two of the three things I have always wanted to do in my life! Unfortunately I only had to read one line to rule out Ginger Spice: Part French. No way am I becoming one of those frogs.. NEXT!

So we come to my final Spice Girl: Sporty Spice. She is not the hottest of the girls but she is pretty hot. You would expect she would be in great shape, being called Sporty and all. I also love a girl with a pony tail. Of all the girls she seems to have had the most success post-spice. Show me the money baby!! As a bonus I could find no information on any guys she had gone out with so the lesbian thing is totally possible. Of all the Spice Girls I find her to be the least damaged. So it is with great pleasure that I swing my magic wand (yes girls, it is magical) and become the lovely Sporty Spice.

Thursday, October 12, 2006

WSOP Interesting Table

I am an emotional guy. I played online for a while to learn to control those emotions because when you play online you see so many bad beats in a row if you lose control you go broke.
- Joe Hachem

Ok. I know I have butchered this quote but what a fucking cool thing for the guy to say. "When you play online you see so many bad beats". So true. I am glad it is not just me. I would love to sit down at a poker table and have him elaborate on why he thinks this is. Very interesting to hear though.

It was funny, I.E. Hollywooded, how they played that clip just before Joe's KK got crushed by JTo. Flop comes JJx. I forget who Joe was playing.. some aggro Asian guy.. After a raise and call before him Joe re-raises a HUGE amount of chips and the guy with JT thinks.. "Hey, this is a great place to push him off a hand".. Hello? You really think the guy who had been playing the final table the tightest is going to raise that much with crap? It looked to me like a horrible time to try and steal a pot when Joe had practically flipped his cards over and announced he had a huge hand. The announcers were pretty funny though with the following quote "Why do bad players always seem to get rewarded". I actually felt sorry for Joe there.

I also saw a WICKED small stack play. I can not for my life remember who played the hand this way.. but some Italian goombah looking guy. He had a small stack and had 99. He raised the standard 3-4xBB.. and saw the flop. How amazing is that you push monkeys? I would have fucking pushed there myself. So the flop comes T86. He then pushes. He has enough behind him to make a pot bet here. The other guy folds. Brilliant play. The show then goes rabbit hunting and an ACE would have hit on the turn. It goes to show that being a push monkey is not always a good thing even as a small stack. I watched Phil Helmouth go out on the next hand with the exact same 99, he decided to push pre-flop, and the Ace hit him on the river. Gives you something to think about next time you find yourself with around 10BB and a decent pocket pair.

Who says watching Poker on TV is useless..

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

A few more plays...

I wanted to review a couple more plays I had during my Foxwoods trip so I will probably get those out in the next few days. Some where really bad and others were good. I also have a post on my semi-retirement from Online play. Obviously I will be back. However I think that I have some good points to bring up as to why I need a break.

My boy MiamiDonk has made his big announcement. No it is not that he has quit poker and become a full time sports gambooler. He is starting up a higher priced MTT that he calls "The Big Game". It is going to be a $75 game on Full Tilt. The idea I guess is to have a bigger prize pool, smaller field, and keep out the rift raft. Although if you are rift or raft you can always qualify through a token race. I personally doubt the $75 tag will keep too many people out.. besides me of course.. Perhaps that was the point? Anyway.. I will be playing in the first game if fate allows, I.E. I jack my Full Tilt free monies for the month up to $75 before the big game. Otherwise I may just be watching on the sidelines. It sounds like it is going to be a good tourney. I hope it gets off the ground running.

I apparently went something like 10-4, 9-5 in this weeks NFL action. If I was a sports betting man I guess I might have made some money. I may yet get in on the action.. who knows..

Now for an interesting hand I had with KGB. You remember him. The Russian guy who said I was easy to push off hands. Well screw him. Here was an interesting play. I have JTo and limp in because I like the hand and alot of limpers are already hanging out. The flop comes AJ3 with three hearts. Now I have second pair weak kicker. I see KGB lead out for $20. I have around $70 left at this point. I think about the hands I have seen KGB play. I just can not give him credit for the Ace. I think he would have raised an ace. I also realize he likes to push me off pots. So I think for a while. The whole table starts taunting me on.. saying "Ooooh he feels froggy". I have a redraw to a J high flush if I am wrong but something inside says he is on a draw. So I make a decision and push my remaining chips in. He says "Fuck, I did not expect you to do that!".. finally after agonizing for a while he calls.. No more hearts come and he does indeed lose the hand with his flush draw and an over. It was an interesting play.

I am not very fond of plays like this for the most part. If your right you feel smart, but what is the real EV on plays like this? If he spiked a heart or a King he would have won the hand. So I was decently ahead but he had alot of outs. I have not run the odds but I would say it was barely above a coinflip.

Let me mention another really good read I saw in a recent Mookie. The flop comes TT8 and the guy in EP check-pushes I beleive.. he has one caller. He turns over 99 and says: HA! I knew you did not have a Ten. Good read. Nice odds. However he got nailed by a Jack on the river. Now while I really do not like QJ's play here I actually do not like 99's play either. Against its the kind of hand where your pretty weak so why put so many chips in the middle? Do you really want to protect a pair of 9's that badly?

I think especially in low stakes poker games where you can get paid off bigtime with monsters it pays more to keep the weak hands small. You will get bluffed off of a few hands here and there but is the 6% edge over time really worth it when you can get your money in so much further ahead?

I think the response will be that in the long run you take any edge you can. While I philosophically agree with this I think the long run can be a really fucking long time and you easily could go broke before that happens. In games where people make less mistake I think you are forced to exploit smaller edges and make better reads. In lower stakes poker games however you just do not need to push the small edges. You will get your money in the middle with 80-90% favorite hands and the people you are playing against will be more than willing to call you. Just a little thinking about if you should adjust your game depending on who you are playing.

Monday, October 09, 2006

Norember Eleventy

There has been talk of bloggers hooking up in a Ghey way at Foxwoods around WPT time.. so let's just set a date and see who shows up. I pick November 11th. Why? I dunno.. I hate organizing shit. Actually they will be running some WPT qualifiers that weekend so it might be fun. I may play some of them but basically I am just looking to play some poker and meet some people. I think a bunch of people could show up.. not a whole Vegas thing but enough to make it interesting. Anyway.. that will be the day I show up. I may stay over to Sunday also.. watching Football at Foxwoods was alot better than trying to get the kids to keep quiet. Hope to see you there!

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda..

I decided to spend Sunday watching Football in my favorite, I.E. Only, B&M casino, the always lovely Foxwoods. I arrived at the tables at 1PM just in time for the kickoff to the Miami game. I received a seat pretty quickly about 20 feet from the giant plasma so I could watch Football all day long in relative comfort. It was going to be an interesting day.

I sat down at the table and started playing with the guys who would be my table mates for the next eleven hours. There would be a few changes but the core team of six of us would trade chips all day long.

I looked down at my first hand and was staring at pocket jacks. Now JJ will tell you that they are ooookayy, but he is a tool. Jacks are dangerous and should be avoided at all cost. I get raised by the MP to $15 (Standard 1/2 raise in this game) and I cold call wanting to see a flop. The flop comes all cards under eight and so I bet out twenty. The "kid" who initially raised puts me all in. We will call him "Overplays TP Kid".. He consistently pushed hard with his top pair any kicker flops. In this game that paid off well. As a funny side story he got busted eight hours later. Apparently he had used a fake id before and was banned from Foxwoods. I thought real hard on the hand and it being my first hand of the night I figured I might as well take the shot to double up. I call. We flip the cards and my JJ is good against his TT. First hand of the night and I have doubled up.

My second hand of the night was KK and I end up taking that pot down uncontested. It is nice when you get good cards. I would soon find out that the table was split into two halves. The half to my left I will call murderer way. I have never sat down at a 1/2NL game at Foxwoods and thought that more than one or two players were good. I had four players in a row that I considered decent.

To my direct left was KGB. He spoke with what could only be described as a Russian accent.. however I am not sure he was Russian. I probably should have asked. He would tell me later in his roundersesque accent that I was very easy to push off hands. He was probably right. He had around $300 in chips. The next in line was the Overplay Overpair Kid with over $400. Next to him was a VERY aggressive Asian with a HUGE gold cross, lets call him JesusAsian..

I know, big surprise aggressive Asian player.. It may be a stereotype.. but it can be true!!! He was very good at making people make that tough decision. He had around $300. The final guy who I showed any respect to was Chess Master. He was a school teacher who taught chess to rich school who could afford his fee. We would mix it up later on. He was a white-black guy. Very polished and refined. Totally opposite of the stereotypical opinion of black people we get show every day on TV. Very smart guy. He was sitting with around $500.

To the right of me was the loser alley. Drunk Horney guy was directly to my right. He was drinking and hooting at everything that passed by. He did not get into too many hands. His friend was directly next to him. I will call him the Anti-Santa. You will find out why soon. Next to him was the Asian guys cuz. He was really bad. Where his brother used aggression to buy pots he called huge bets with 6th pair. Big difference lost on him probably. He did actually get lucky and go home a winner though.

Next to him was a guy who would not last too long. On the third or fourth hand at the table the guy took, and I kid you not, twenty five minutes to decide to call his entire stack off with second pair. He kept trying to figure out if he should call or not while JesusAsian put on the best rock of a poker face and stared him down the entire time. He did not move an eyelash. Finally the guy puts over $100 in to make the call and loses to top pair stupid kicker. Foxwoods informed us that there was no way to call time on anyone. When I asked if someone could sit there for two hours they said no, but could not elaborate on when the person would be forced to make a move.

Not a whole lot happened with me after my first few hands. I played a solid game. I won some money. I got into a hand with the Chess Master where he flopped a boat against my AK. I ended up getting away from that hand relatively unscathed. I also got into an interesting hand with Cuz. I had pocket rockets and had popped it to $15 pre-flop. The flop comes 22Q. Since only two hands beat me I am not folding here. So I bet out. He calls. A two hits the turn. I bet out and ask him if he has the Queen? He makes some comment.. then decides to push me all in. I insta-call. If I am beat by a two or pocket queens then so be it. He had some crap hand and probably put me on Ax and thought I would fold. I do tend to back off hands too often but every once in a while I will make a stand which usually ends up paying off for me.

I had chipped up to over $400 when the worse run of cards happened. It was insane. I will say though it felt like home. Exactly like online poker.

The first hand happens when a shorty pushes his last $15 in. He gets like six callers and the flop comes AKx. Nobody bets the flop. The turn is another king.. I end up putting in twenty there and get cold called. The river is a 9 and the guy who cold called me, JesusAsian, pushes in for another thirty. I have to call there. We flip over. The main pot goes to the guy who pushed his last few bucks in. He had pocket rockets. I lose the secondary pot to JesusAsian on a rivered boat with the nine. Ouch. Three outer. I thought that hurt.

Next hand I get involved in is with Anti-Santa. Now this guy was a fat fuck. He was jovial and fat and could for sure play Santa. Poker was another story. I have AK and I pop it $20. I get one caller. It is Anti-Santa. The flop comes Axx and I pop it again. He cold calls. The turn is a blank. I pop it AGAIN! Hello! I raised. Right? He cold calls again. The river is a ten. I am kind of concerned now. He checks and I check behind. He turns over AT for the rivered Ten. I have now lost two hundred bucks in two hands with somewhat brutal three-outer loses. Ouch. Ok though. I am still up a hundred.

I look down and see pocket sixes. A small raise comes in EP and I call. The flop comes a very coordinated 236 with two spades. I decide I am ahead of this hand and prepare to push. JesusAsian bets twenty into the pot and Anti-Santa PUSHES his last thirty six. I decide that the board is too coordinated to let JesusAsian stay in so I raise another hundred. He folds. The fat Santa bastard turns over TT and I am loving it until the ten on the turn. OWWWCH! I got two outered. "No no no" say KGB I had a ten too. A one outer after the flop. I think that's like a 4%'er. So anyone who says online poker is rigged.. well, all poker is rigged. I really can not blame Anti-Santa for that move. He had very few chips left and he had an overpair. It still hurt. Three hands in a row and I drop all of my winnings.

Of course this is enough to put me on tilt for a little. I played very poorly for the next little while and ended up going out when I pushed my remaining $40 with sixes into queens. Ouch. REBUYYYY!!!

One thing I have often heard when talking to people I respect who play this game is that they rebuy alot. They are always prepared to rebuy. Online I would usually lose a buyin to a sick beat and then leave the table. I think it is VERY key to be willing to rebuy in these situations. Every time I have gone to Foxwoods I have brought three buyins.. because that was a number I was willing to lose. The majority of the times I have gone I had to rebuy at least once. It is a small thing but very important.

So I finally pull it together. Tell myself to stop calling of the $15 raises with speculative hands. Tell myself to play a little better. I finally look down and see AJc and I pop it to $15. I have around fifty left. I get called by KGB. The flop comes all harmless undercards and I assume I am ahead so I put out a $30 bet leaving me with another $15 or so. KGB instantly puts me all in. I have to call here. He outplayed me bad. He turns over his pocket tens.. and the Jack on the turn pulls my ass out of the fire. He was pissssed. He was still up a ton though. I now had a stack of around $140.

I get into a hand with the Chess Master that was a real head game. I look down and see pocket rockets and I raise the standard $15. I get called by Chess Master and the flop comes all low, fairly unconnected hands. He immediately starts taunting me. I bet out twenty on the flop. He is like "So, what card do you want to see?".. I point to the right one and he shows me the left which paired with on of the cards. He cold calls me. I bet out twenty again on a rag card. He raises me to $45. I think hard about it as he keeps taunting me. Telling me he has hit his draw. I cold call that bet. The river is a king. Here he does something that was a real poker move. I check the river on him and he pushes me in for my remaining $80. Now I know he has to put me on AK as a possible hand and the K on the river does not scare him at all. The board is pretty tame with one weird straight and possibly two pair somewhere. SO either he is pulling of a huge steal attempt or I am beat. I go into the tank and decide that I may be behind but I am calling. The bet just smells like a play. I had seen him push other people off of hands.. and to be honest, it was a brilliant poker move. He had over six hundred in chips and it only cost him another hundred. On the other hand if I lose this hand I am reaching into my pocket for my last bill. I finally make the agonizing call and I am right. I take a huge pot with AA vs a pair of sixes. Nice play. Made me respect the guy even more than before. Chess Master was a thinking player. I always respect that. I am not sure my call here was "the right" call.. but I made it and it worked out this time.

So I kept playing for a little while more.. Chess Master vowed to be in every pot I was in and to take my money. He was very aggravated when I gave any of it away to other people. I flopped another set against a guy with TPTK and actually won that one.. I lost a few hands here and there.

I watched Chess Master start his second rack of chips when he busted JesusAsian with a higher straight. It was wild. He had to have been sitting on 1K worth of chips. I enjoyed watching Anti-Santa blow through three or four buyins. I bet that hurts the ole teachers salary, ehh fat ass? I think I might have been a little hard on the guy. However that 4%'er hurt like hell. All in all it was a really fun game.

Alas it was not meant to be for me though. I easily could have been up five or six hundred in this game. If a few hands had gone differently. Of course I could have been down the same amount also. I ended the night after Sunday Night Football finished up. We all shook hands and wished each other good luck as I racked up and left.

I walked to my car at Midnight with a little profit of $140, about 1.5 buyins. I continued my un-beaten streak at live play which was nice. I am sure one of these days I am going to get smoked. Until then I am enjoying the run. I am still waiting for that one HUGE day when I just destroy the table. I was at one of the most difficult tables I had seen so far and I held my own. I mostly kept away from the good players.. and tried to punish the bad ones. I think one of these weeks I will have a night where I make 5-6 buyins or more. I have been very close a few times and either have made a few bad calls or gotten some nasty suckouts. I nice, solid, tight game plays well here. I look forward to doing well in the future.

Fantasy FootBall Sucks

When you get Hoyed by the Hoy in FFL and your team is now 1-4 it is time to throw in the towel. It has been a great season.. Started out with my #1 running back going down, mid-season saw my #1 wide receiver go down. I think it is a sign!!! Oh well. It was fun while it lasted. How did I do with my picks anyways Don?

Friday, October 06, 2006


Just because Loud was doing it.. I like to run through my stats every once in a while. I am averaging 892 UNIQUE visitors a week.. that is freaking wild. I have trouble beleiving that 3 people read this blog, but 892 peeps.. I humbly bow to your loyal patronage. I actually used to get even more unique visitors.. but some of you wised up and left.

Came from is always my favorite. It never fails to solicite a chuckle from me. Some of the good ones first:

MiamiDon is my #1 referrer for the week. Thanks Bro! I appologize in advance for beating the crap out of your Dolphins.

One of my favorite blogettes ever April is a close second. A few nice to mentions are Little Acorn Man.. I better jot over to his site and make sure he is not writing crap about me. heh. Remember I am watching you all! Especially you Dnasty! Ok I used to read all the blogs but I now actually have to work. Sorry. The ever popular Hoy rounds the list out.

The Bad:

The site peopleintopoker.com has some referrers. I will not link to them though. I think stealing my content without asking me or at least telling me your going to do it is bad. I would not go as far as to say I work hard on my content.. but it is mine dammit.. so hands off!

And the Ugly:

Google searches always are very interesting. You have the weird ones, "how to know when you are done peeing maddox", The usual ones "online poker whores", and the really messed up ones: "man with man sex online", "fat deaf divorcee online" and "donkey attacking man while taking shit". One last one, "Mother fucking".. Mom would be so proud. Of course the fact that I mention these weird searches that find my blog only ensures that the cycle will continue.

My world wide popularity continue to grow as I get visits from Bulgaria, Packistan, Lithuania, Korea, and Kenya, France, Sweden, Germany, Ireland, and the UK. The top three countries are USA, Canada and Australia in that order. Thank you much Kitty and Loud. For those of you from exotic locals please remember I am at war with AlCantHang. You must go to the link on the right (Under Readers->Click Here) and add yourself to my Google map!!! The war has been raging for over a year and I beleive in you! Now go! go! go!

Well that is it for this installment of shit I never wanted to know. Thank you all for coming.

Temporary Retirement

I am taking a short break from Online Poker.. wait until the heat from the fuzz dies down. Actually the new laws have nothing to do with it. I just feel like a break. I cashed out my funds which makes it around 2K cashed out this year. Nothing big but it is nice to be ahead.

I guess since I am a pillar of the Blogging community I will have to chose a date for the Foxwoods trip.. It will be forthcoming. I can promise nothing in the way of being a good host. Now if Carmen came down that would be something special!!! I forget if that is when she is going to be in Maryland anyways? Possibly? I will pick a date soon anyways.. then we can get a head count. See ya there in my ratty jeans and a T-shirt.

I have not taken a break from Poker however as I plan to hit up Foxwoods possibly this weekend. It depends on how the side-work goes this weekend. It is hard to pass up mad money to go play poker. Even though poker is much more fun it does not even come close to comparing to the money I get freelancing. Chris was thinking of hitting up the woods tonight possibly.. If that is still on let me know!!! If not I will probably wander in there sometime Saturday/Sunday.

I was thinking Sunday might be cool.. although I am not sure if they have the games on in some sports bar there.. anyone ever watch Sunday Football at Foxwoods? Is it any good? Where should I go? I think my forray back into online play might just happen when my good friend MiamiDon unveils his latest surprise. I will not ruin it for him. It is hush. hush. Top secret.

Go and tell him he did goot for a cash playah in his MTTs last night. We actually had an interesting debate while I was railing him in the 20K. He saw a smallish stack (M<10) keep pushing with hands like AK/JJ etc. The small stack had just under 10BB left. His idea was to raise 3x and play a hand.. I was in favor of the push. I think this is standard MTT strategy. The idea being to make your opponent make a loose call and to double up. Since your so low you need the chips. I think we both agreed the best strategy is to not get that low.

If your playing too tight and letting yourself be blinded out then it is your own fault if pushing becomes your only option. I think one thing Ick does to consistently money is constant steals. He *tries* to not get his stack too low.. I think in the middle-end game I tighten up too much.. especially when I have a nice stack. I figure I can wait for a hand. However usually this allows the rest of the field to catch up with me and the blinds to punish me. I need to add more aggression in and keep my leads.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Foxwoods MTT

I went to umm.. ya Foxwoods last night.. and err.. wow what a surprise.. err, Mookie was there! ya, thats it.. ya Mookie and Smokkee and Ick.. it was pretty cool. Except that bra and panties Ick was wearing kinda freaked me out. Of course my Frog costume could not have made him feel too safe.. although I swear Flyers Fan was eying my large tongue.. Anyway.. it was weird seeing all these people at Foxwoods.. yeah thats it..

I started out really well. Every hand hit the flop MAD HARD! I easily chipped up to 7K really early. Sometimes this is not a good thing. BoneDaddy AKA Eric the used-to-be-blogger had J9 vs my AJ on a JJ board. The river made a 4 flush which gave me the nut flush. Eric still called off his remaining chips which he probably had to do as most of the chips went in before the river. I actually though he caught a flush on the turn on me. He basically played the hand the only way he could though. Tough one. I think he is getting a little tired of busting out to me. Sound familiar Kitty?

I barely remember my hands.. I do remember Statik calling me down with AK when I had Jacks.. I guess he was tired or just did not beleive me because I KNOW he plays better than that. I rivered a house just to rub it in.

It was also fun to take out the ever difficult DuggleBoggey. He has been on a HUGE run and it was nice to outchip him when we finally met up. He decided to push his 44 as a small stack into my big slick. It was a no-brainer play for both of us as I had him massively outchipped and he had a small M with a pocket pair. I won the race and sent him packing.

I beleive the only mistake I made the entire night was calling above mentioned Flyers Fan down with A9. It only cost me about 2K in chips.. she had limped in EP with AK and we both hit our Aces. She boated up to rub it in. I know. A9 sucks.. the limp tricked me good and I was amazed when she turned over her hand.. however AT beats me just as easily there so bad play on my part.

The rest of the night was full of blinds eating me and flops missing until I found myself at critical M<5 stack size. I really was not involved in any other big hands after Shelly put me in my place. I just stopped getting anything playable and was chipped down as the blinds hit 4K.

I finally went out when someone limped Queens in EP and I pushed my eights.. I was hoping for more of a race situation and as Duggles had to push his 4's earlier I think my move was correct. I will say I do not think it is EVER a good idea to limp Queens.. The bitches are fickle enough and I could easily have played 53o in my BB and outflopped the ladies. I guess it just goes against my ingrained nature to not protect strong but vulnerable starting hands. However in this instance it worked out for him. I probably would have pushed my eights even if he had raised. Only because of my short-stackedness.

So thanks to everyone for coming down to.. err.. umm.. Foxwoods to play.. See you all next time! Actually speaking of Foxwoods everyone has been talking about a get together in November. I guess there is some kind of WPT or some other poker tourney or qualifiers around then? Someone who is less clueless can probably fill you in.. if anyone is interested in going lets all meet up. We can all wear Blogs are Ghey T-Shirts so we can find each other.. yeah thats it.. Like a Micky Mouse club for retards. I bet that would get us alot of action! So let me know if your interested in Waffles-Vegas(tm) in November.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Online Anti-American Law

So what are you going to do about your online funds? I personally put mine into holding in Firepay until the backlash washes over.

Neteller is my cash transferor of choice, but they are a European company. Do you know what that means? It means the US government has no jurisdiction over them. - Jordon

First off look at your login screen to Neteller today. Secondly it is this kind of attitude that is killing America. I do not mean to pick on J and honestly think he did not mean anything by it.

Why is Jordon is killing America then? We all are so caught up in what we can get out of this world for ourselves that we forget to look at the big picture. I am very disturbed by many of the recent bills that have been passed under Fuehrer Bush lately. I was happy to see Absinthe post about the "Torture is Good" bill that was recently passed. It basically says that the US can hold any "Terrorist" without a trial or any rights at all. Basically they disappear. Now on the face of this it sounds pretty good right? We can scoop up the terrorists and hold them where they can not hurt any American's. Who would be against that right? It does not effect you right J?

Soo.. sooo.. dangerouse. Our founding fathers were pretty smart. They put these checks and balances in for a reason. It was so that no one group could become too powerful. So that the average American would not be shut up. So that you and I could Blog crap until it shot out of our ears. It is the essence of being American. When people start thinking they are above this it is extremely scary. The title of "Terrorist" is very nebulous.. today it is Taliban extremists.. tomorrow a few Arabs in America who spoke against Bush.. next day some Americans that the Government does not want to annoy them.

You think this is far fetched? It has happened before to an American even before this law was enacted. A kid named Kevin Mitnick. He was a Hacker. Actually I kind of fancy him as the king of hackers. I admire the skills of Hackers but am a White Hat for sure. I do not agree with anything this kid did. However his super powers are the thing that nerds dream of. He was so feared, and misunderstood, by the government that they would not allow him to touch a telephone for fear of what he could do.

Mitnick continues to claim that his treatment was unfair and has alleged that at one time he was held in solitary confinement for 8 months because his girlfriend Suzy Thunder told authorities Mitnick could cause a nuclear attack by whistling into a phone. - Wikipedia

So basically he was thrown in jail for four years without a trial, much of it in solitary confinement, and not allowed to communicate with the outside world. He finally caved and took a plea so he could be released. All because the government was afraid of him. Who is to say what your hick neighbor might tell the government you can do? Who knows what group will be the next target of the government. Absolute power like a government corrupts absolutely and without the checks and bounds put in place on ALL PEOPLES civil rights are being threatened.

We see our personal rights being walked on every day. The Internet gambling prohibition is just a small part of it. There is a group of people in our country that say they know what is better for us than we do. We are not adult enough to protect ourselves from us. We need to be taken care of by these magnificent gods and protected from drugs, smoking, and gambling. Of course if they want to do these things in the shadows it is ok. As long as they do not get caught.

My personal view on this is that they are probably right. We can not take care of ourselves. However that is our decision and almost everyone fucks it up every day. In one way or another most people are damaged. It is what makes us human. Taking away one vice is not going to stop us from being screwups. We will just find a different way. Instead of gambling on a relatively safe online site we will go to joe-cardsharks backalley poker game. Where we can get cheated at the least or possibly killed or beaten up. Prohibition has never worked and it never will.

I really doubt my blog will make any difference in the world. The president or the congress will not read this and say "Damn, he is right!". You people need to make the difference though. Protest. Right letters. Vote. Do something. Do not just say "It does not effect me so who cares". We should do a million-poker-player march on Washington or something. I am in.

I am really not sure what will change the wrong turn our country has taken. I personally am going to vote all Democrat this year to try and balance out the power instead of having one group control everything. We do this in Massachusetts almost every year. Either a republican governor and Democratic Senate or the other way. When we mess up and let either side get full power it usually throws our state into turmoil.

[end diatribe]

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Long Days and Sleepless Nights

Interesting night at the tables. Played a bunch of MTTs. Came close in a few.. the usual, out 300th in the 11/Rebuy.. AK vs A9 for a 30K pot. Way to push A9 in early position I guess.. Finished ITM in the 20/180. Busted out 14th with KK vs Ax or some crap like that. Again would have been nice to win that pot and be middle of the pack for the final table.

I then decided to donk it up playing some cash. Man were the cards hitting me. I made HUGE errors in judgement and everytime got paid off. I was hitting nut hands so often that I started just raising the river huge so I would not have to show. It really pissed off my table mates. My biggest error of the night was also my biggest hand, although, ironically it did not end up making my night.

I started off the night by donking off all my chips but $7. I took the $7 and pushed a few times to bring it up to $40. I then had this amazing and yet idiotic hand. I had KQ and had been having some success with it so I limp. Guy after me raises and a third guy calls. Flop comes Kxx. I check, first guy bets 12, and the other guy cold calls. Now I am not sure if this is a c-bet or what so I call. The pot is $46. I may or may not have the best hand. I am not sure yet. So I check again. The first guy pushes for 40. The second guy calls. Now I am pretty sure I am behind here. However I end up getting blinded by the 160$ pot and so I call. The river is a lovely Queen and all of the chips come sliding over to me. Sorry about that AK.

All was going well until I looked down and saw AA. I raised it pre-flop and got one caller. Potted the flop, potted the turn, and of course got rivered by TT. Ug. I called of a 30$ bet I probably should not have on the river. Losing a $138 pot which really did not feel good. I was now back down to my buyin. We then had this hand.

I had Q6d. I liked the flop. I thought I was ahead and statistically I was slightly ahead as a 53-47% fav. I ended up pushing to a guys bet on the flop. I either win the hand right here or have probably 15 outs.. maybe a little less. He ends up liking his JJ alot and we go to the races. Lucky for me I spike a queen on the river and that is it for his stack. I chip up to $180 and decide I probably should leave. heh. It was an interesting night for sure.