Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Winnah Winnah Chicken Dinnah

I did it somehow. Loretta finished in 37th place for zero points and I held on to win the seat. Initial plans are to add the funds to my bankroll but if I win a WSOP seat I will probably use them to play in one of the other 2K events.

I have to say Loretta made it tough. I was really sweating today. I knew he needed a third place or better finish but I also knew he was capable of doing it. Much thanks to ScottMc who blasted Loretta to pieces with AQ vs KK. I knew Scotty really liked me. *sniffle*.

I did not make my goal of first place in the BBT3, and that will have to wait until May I guess. I am going to try and win another seat for May. I mean once you do it the first time it is like riding a bicycle.

Anyway thanks to all the well wishers and hooters and screamers, the ROOOAR guys whoever they are.. and everyone else who supported this win. I believe that I will win a seat to the WSOP ME and play this June. I also have some good vibes about going deep in it and winning some money. First things first though.

The April That Never Ended

Ok. I did some rough math. Bayne will tell you how bad my math skillz are. In order for Loretta to win he has to get 3rd or better in the Mookie. This assumes 106 players. If I hold on tonight then I win. In hindsite the correct move in Stud last night with 18 players left was to shut the computer off. However I do not play that way. I did gain another 47 points. Further calculations show that to take overall points lead for the entire BBT3 and be the number one player I need to take first in the Mookie myself to overtake Lucky John. Haha. I am being sarcastic John good job this month. Anyhow I can not lose tonight because either way it will be over and I can move on to May. It will be a good battle tonight I think. Good Game to all playing.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Loretta Making Waves

Loretta did what he had to do last night and won some points. The lead is down to <150 with Two games remaining. It is never easy is it? Estimated facts cackled with glee from our dear MIA AlCantHang last night on the girlie chat.

I played to win last night. I perhaps should have folded to 15th and taken the forty points but fuck it I went for the juggler. I called RecessRampages all in and raced my AQ against his K8 getting crippled. Loretta then doubled me up when my Q9 beat his 44. RecessRampages then had a chance to eliminate Loretta when his AK went up against J6. I then jammed my A7 into someones A6 and we ended up tied. Finally with my somewhat crippled stack I jammed my sevens right into Loretta's KK. Ouch. Congratz to Loretta for getting some much needed points. The game last night really shows MTT play at it's most basic. If I win a hand from RecessRampages or the A7, or if RecessRampages takes out Loretta then I am free rolling to the April win and probably adding a bunch of points to my lead last night. Apparently I have Lightning to thank for saving me a few points.

In my estimation* Loretta has to make some amount of points tonight OR outright win the Mookie tomorrow. Second place might do it also. In order to end his ability to win I need to score probably seventh or better. Hoyazo* is also still in the race. He would also need a Mookie win and some points tonight. He is slightly less favored because he did not get any points last night. At least life is exciting.

I am really hoping to put it out of reach tonight. I was told the game is Stud-hi and if this is the case I think I have a shot at going deep. If I can keep my chasing to a minimum. We will see what happens.

*All point estimates are assuming 50 runners in the Skillz and 106 in the Mookie.

Monday, April 28, 2008

Big Game Curse

Is Officially over. I did not score first mind you but a very respectable third. On the good side that puts me at around 250 points in the lead for the April 2k seat. ROOOOOAAARRR!!! Excellent game by MiamiDon in second and Wormboy in first. I went out when I jammed AK against Fools Gold. Ah well. It was s000ted too. Worm raised in ep to 5k, I had a 30k stack. I MAYBE could have called there but went for the aggressive lets take first move. If I had won that hand I would have been first in chips. I am satisfied with my finish as the Big Game has always been a curse to me.

Hoyazo mentioned last night that he might not be able to make the final three games of the month. Immediately I was like "WAHOO!!!". I mean that leaves only Loretta with a shot at overtaking me. A slim shot but it is possible. Now though I think it would be more challenging if Hoyazo did make these last games. Beyond all else I like the competition. Even if this April race has been driving me crazy.

My backer has shown a little bit of profit so far. He is up around $200 which is chump change to him but it is nice. He will probably be adding another 1k to that total at the end of April if I can hold on. I also surpassed Bayne in our little bet even without April. I started out with a $600 deficit against him and now have $200 in the lead as far as cash goes. I have a big points lead also. Early on we clarified that any packages won count as cash so I will hopefully soon have a $2200 cash lead on him. Nice start anyways.

Have a great day people. I know I will.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

I Play Poker For..

YOU! YOU! YOU! And you there, yeah, the one hiding in the corner. YOU ALL! Thank You So Very Much!!!!

Friday, April 25, 2008

FullTilt Pro

Hey my good friend Choad thinks I should be a FT pro. One of the Red Letter guys. That is so awesome man. I appreciate the confidence you have. Actually he may have only said it because he is a women hating closet homosexual but I prefer to think he likes my mad skillz.

Same Movie, You Decide

Hope Jordon does not sue me. Anyway.

Forbidden Kingdom:
With the lost relic in hand, the teenager unexpectedly finds himself traveling back to ancient China to join a crew of warriors from martial arts lore on a dangerous quest to free the imprisoned Monkey King.

Monkey King Mini Series:

When Nicholas Orton (soon to be named The Scholar From Above) reaches the other side of the portal, he finds that his studies of Confucius will come in handy for the path that lies ahead. Nicholas Orton's first action is to rescue Sun Wukong the Monkey King from the mountain which he has been imprisoned in for centuries. Sun Wukong (the Monkey King or Monkey Emperor) travels with Nicholas Orton in his quest to save the original manuscript of Journey to the West from destruction. They are later joined by Zhu Bajie (Pigsy) and Sha Wujing (Friar Sand) to help them on the way.

Hmm. Is Monkey King a famous Chinese character who is constantly imprisoned? Are these movies the sorta same remake movie except Disney kid style? What do you think?

Spring Has Sprung

Sexy chicks with short shorts, tits hanging out, short skirts flapping in the wind. Almost makes me not want to rant about Riverfuckers last night. Almost. Jesus Christ. I understand these are a bunch of drunk bar monkeys. Albeit nice drunk bar monkeys some of whom I have befriended. However can you get a fucking clue and not play this game like blackjack?

I went out on the classic BJ hand. I have a guy in the CO stealing with a 240 raise, so I jam over the top of him. This beer donkey thinks forever and finally calls a bet and a re-raise with the amazing hand of KJs. For at least a third of his stack. Probably more if the CO actually has a hand because the CO has him covered. How do you make a fucking donkey call like that? What happened my friends? Of course the fucking alligator taint licker turns a gutterball straight on me and I go home early.

I will fully admit my earlier bad play put me in position to make a daring move in that spot. However I never should have been called by that ape ass licking donk. I swear he should roll up his over sized tongue and get a lobotomy.

As far as the race for April it is really heating up. I could have gained some more points on Hoyazo* last night since he decided to watch LOST instead of play. I have four more games to hold on to my lead. I only have a slight lead at this point and would be really happy to take first in the Big Game and put it all out of reach. Having said this if there is one game I have consistently either played poorly in or got sucked out in the Big Game is it. Perhaps this is the time to change that. ROOOOOARRRRR!!

Anyway piece out. I do apologize to the scum sucker that made the horrible call on me. While I really do think you are a moron I do not hope you die. Perhaps get VD from your dog or something.. nononono.. What I really hope is that you have fun playing because in the end that is what it is all about.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008


Well I went deep again finishing forth in the MOOKIE. I could have done a lot better but my AQ got sucked out on by AJ. The play by my opponent was a strong one. He raised 11K pre-flop and committed himself. I had a better hand and jammed for my last 11K.. and he obviously had to call. It was a standard hand. When the Jack hit the turn.. well it hurt but that is how it goes sometimes. I really feel lucky to have gotten that far as my cards were pretty horrible throughout the game. I got Aces in a good spot when I really needed them and doubled up which allowed me to fight hard and make that final table.

So I got some cash and some much needed points. I will hopefully be able to do well in the RC tomorrow night and put some distance between me and the resurgent Hoyazo*. All in all I had a good time.

Sometimes I really think we bring cards on ourselves. What do you think? I was kind of tired and let my negativity creep in a little on that last hand and sort of saw that jack coming. Did I bring it on myself in some cosmic joke of fortune? Is it just the RNG? Was being mean to PirateLawyer the cause of my demise? Who knows. I do think trying to be positive helps your mindset at the very least and the game is a large part about your mindset.

Wish me luck for tomorrow. I shall do my best as I am sure Hoy* will. Peace out.

Show Me The Tragedy

Worst teeth in the USA.. first place goes to Lubbock Texas! Yay Tragedy! Next in line is Philadelphia! WOOT AlCantHang!


I have to give it to Hoy* he is making a mad run for that April spot. Putting a lot of pressure on me. I have cooled off the past two weeks and really need to get it in gear. I played more Stud last night. I went up. Then down. Then up. Then down. Ended the night down 1.5 buyins. The hands I seem to be losing are Straight vs Flush, Flush vs Boat, etc, etc.. So I do not think I am playing badly. Just hitting the bad side of some variance.

The Skillz was pretty funny. I went in two times with the same exact hand, same exact play, same exact turn card. It was wicked. Basically I had AKJ on a QT board vs AA. Both times I tried to represent a set or something and both times AA no draw no way to improve called. Not sure this is a great call in general for AA.. but the odds held true and I won the first and lost the second.

Tonight deep stack knockout Mookie should be fun. See you there.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008


Playing in a Poker Tournament

People who play poker obviously play it because they love the game.  While they might also being playing to win money, there needs to be a love of the game involved or it will just become boring.  But even the most enthusiastic player gets bored sometimes and that’s when it is time to leave the regular table and step into a poker tournament.

Freeroll poker tournaments provide a much needed relief from the average action that takes place at a normal card table and also puts some thrill and excitement into the game.  Plus, a poker tournament usually gets a lot more attention than the regular cash games at casinos and online poker rooms and can get certain people some fame in the process.

There are various sizes for a poker tournament in an online poker game.  Some of them are small events where only 20 to 30 people will be in attendance.  Prizes for such types of events are usually not very significant but neither are the entry fees either.

A bigger poker tournament may see 300, or even more, people at the felt.  Tourneys such as these may not have a high entry fee either do to the fact that so many people are involved and they can yield a pretty significant prize as well for those who finish in the upper part. 

Poker tournament like at BetUS Poker Room can happen online too.  An event like the World Series of Poker, which occurs at a real location, attracts thousands of players and sees millions of dollars spent in the process.

Most average or beginning players shouldn’t attend such an event and are better off learning the poker tournament ways at a local card room or small online venue.

AlCantHang Exposed

I found this picture of AlCantHang.

Courtesy of Creatures in My Head.

Was it a good night?

I have no idea. It started out pretty good. As I won a buyin at my new game STUD. Yes I am joining the depends group at least for a while. I have been running really good and keeping it together. I then optimistically started the Hoyazo* and flamed out in spectacular fashion. It all really came down to this one retard that called every raise I made and then outdrew me with his craptastic hands. Finally I let my frustration get to me and jammed LJ when she re-raised me. Of course when LJ re-raises she is dead serious and will never, ever, ever, in a million years fold to an EP jam. While normally my range has her slaughtered here in this case her AQ held up and she double. I almost sucked out when the flop came KTx, but she resucked on the turn with a Queen. The river King helped nobody.

I then went back to the Stud and a few SNGs. Quickly dropped my winnings and another buyin playing Stud. The hand that killed me was sixth street made K high flush. One guy showing 2 hearts and 2 diamonds, the other guy showing nothing. I check-raise and get the pot up to a whopping 20BB and get rivered by a KT flush vs my K8. ARGGGG! That would have made my night. I then donked out of my SNG and felt the pressure to WIN WIN WIN! I promptly shut off the computer for the night.

I guess in a way that is a small victory. Tonight I will try and get my head together and do well in the Skillz game. We shall see what happens. Good luck to you all.

Monday, April 21, 2008

Have you people never seen runners?

OMFG! I am on super fucking Marathon Monday tilt. I mean jesus christ has nobody ever seen someone running? Just stand out side a 7-11 in an inner city neighborhood.. I bet you will see much better racing than this whole fucking marathon. I mean seriously. I am so fucking beat now. I have been walking around in circles for the past hour trying to get to my building. I do not know what is worse my sweaty ass crack, my smelly pits, or the chaffing of my sensitive thighs. All of this for some fucking retards running twenty six miles. I mean that is even more boring than tennis. Go fuck yourselves all you running scumbags. That is all.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Fishing Donk

Holy fuck. I suck at Fishing rods. I got one of our rods tangled and could not figure out how come the other one would not reel in. Motherfucking donkey I am. I finally asked Riggs and he came through. Thanks pardner. We had a good day. We did not catch anything in the allotted time but ended up catching a 15" Pike. Big fucking teeth! Kids had fun and I got burnt to hell. Good times.

Saturday, April 19, 2008


I have to do that fishing thing with the kid tomorrow. I think it is time to get him some fishing pole and like tackle.. so he can like tackle some fish or something. I have no idea. It was fun last year when we used some little fish to catch some big ass bass or something like that. It was pretty cool.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Goddamn Fucking Cat

I swear if that motherfucker does not stop licking my hands at 2AM in the morning I am going to kill it. It almost got a boot off the bed last night. I swear for the last two nights this fucker comes up and starts licking my hands. It then puts its face in my face and starts purring. It is not fucking patting time you cocksucker!!!! Goddamn I am starting to hate those cats. If it was not for the kids I swear I would let them outside where the coyotes roam and that would be that. Cat burgers. Recycling baby. Fuck you all.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Variance Baby

Well after the really hot start to April I have had two bad finishes in a row. Last night I got a ton of small pairs and called raises. Missed every set except one quad fives which I made very little off of. Finally I decided to go all in against a raise with AK. My opponent called off his entire stack with sevens and when the ACE hit on the flop I thought this might be the catalyst to swing me into a good night however the seven on the river dashed any hope of that. Oh well. For the record I do not condone calling your entire stack off with sevens but he was ahead.

Tonight besides the Riverfuckers I will be playing in the Le Cheeze 1K Freeroll. My motto has always been if it is free it is for me. He actually has had two late cancellations so if you would like to join this freeroll IM me or give me some way of contacting you. First two people who do so will get to play. It starts early at 6:00 EST so be sure you can make it.

Congratz to Hoyazo* for the early Christmas gift. It must be fun to be given a seat instead of earning it like everyone else. Do I blame the guy for buying this seat? Of course not. I would do it in a second. Do I think he might have been able to win by himself. Anything is possible. Will I sneer at him from my high and mighty WINNER seat, fucking right I will. In the end though all that matters is the winning not how you got there and he has his shot at the golden ring now. Good luck to you man.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Stupid Idiots

When Hoy starts playing shittier he gets nastier in comments
- A blogger who wishes to remain anonymous

I have yet to ferret out these cocknose shitheads that hoy speaks of. Will they allow me into their primitive circle. If I find these illusive creatures can I fully be accepted into their tribe? Only time will tell.

Seriously it has been fun ribbing Hoyazo about his blowups deep in these games lately. Lord knows I get my share of that crap. I think a lot of the really good MTT players like Hoyazo have problems in the blogger games because they play them like 2000 person games. While that style absolutely can get you a win I think that small field MTT games can be won by MANY different styles. You are not so stuck to accumulate huge amount of chips because the final table is not that huge. For a long while I tried to be more aggressive in these things but when I settled down and started playing tighter I ended up with several final tables.

I will say I would much rather be great at large field MTT games like Hoyazo is than smaller field games. Possibly one of these days I will get the hang of them. However they seem to require you to play like 20 games a night and that requires a huge bankroll. While the bankroll is running well in the right direction I have a ways to go before I hit the large MTT circuit again.

Last night I hit a patch of variance and went out quick in Stud. The combination of making strong hands against stronger hands, missing huge draws, and being deep in a Stars SNG made it hard to win. You really need focus in Stud. I did take first in my SNG and then played one on Full Tilt and took second. Good times.

On a bad note my car was totaled by my ugly ass Au Pair. First she has the audacity to be ugly.. then she wrecks my car. Luckily the kids were not in it. The fucking company that provided her guarantees these whores can drive however we found out she just got her license before coming here. I mean give me a fucking break. I am really pretty pissed off. We will probably get 10-15K for the car since it is four years old. I am hoping we can find a nice certified used car to replace it with for the same amount. Does anyone have any experience with dealer certified cars? I know you get a warentee and stuff. Hopefully we can find a nice replacement that does not cost us a fortune. It was nice not having a car payment. I do not look forward to having three since my car is likely going to die soon and we all remember the Wife going out and buying a new car behind my back. Life is fun.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Monday At The Hoy

Went Deep. Sucked out twice to keep 7th. Got Aces Astin amount of times. Finally went out when Loretta called my all in with KT, I had A4.. I am not sure how much of his stack it was for. However it was a decent amount. He spikes the straight on the turn. Ouch. Sick game. You gotta teach me that sometime. LJ almost took Loretta out for me when she got in ahead 3x and went 1-3. Something like that. I knew it was going to be tough and only get tougher at the final table because everyone who was left was an aggressive, tough, MTT player. Except me. I hated the lineup for sure. At least I cashed again. We will have to see where Loretta places.. I could be out of first.

I always thought that you jammed good cards and did not call jams with weak ones. I guess you call off big jams if you think you might be 40/60 and the guy does not have you covered? I dunno. MTT play confuses me. At least Hoyazo donked out early. Probably Karma for calling people shitheads. I am not sure who he called a shithead exactly.
Hammer Player a.k.a Hoyazo said...

Seriously man, what on earth are you thinking when you make those two calls in this hand? Were you just trying to think of the literal least profitable way of playing this hand and then going for it?

Never mind the fact that this was not even a real gutshot, which has been pointed out above.

No wonder you have won two Mookie's man. You fit right in with all the rest of those shitheads.

So does that mean Mookie is a shithead? Anyone who has won the Mookie is a shithead? Anyone who plays the Mookie is a shithead? No idea. Weird. Oh well. Gnight all you shitheads. Peace and brown shitty dreams.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Sucko is Wrong: Part III

Overbet your gutshot until the cows come home baby! BOOM! Does this count for Fuel's contest btw? Here I do the classic 2-card call for the river gutshot. This is an advanced move and should not be tried by Sucko's. The over bet to knock the guy out on the bubble is CLASSIC. Please tell me again how I should not overbet my gutshot when it hits. I am listening.

Full Tilt Poker Game #6005730296: $5 + $0.50 Sit & Go (45722711), Table 1 - 50/100 - No Limit Hold'em - 14:07:50 ET - 2008/04/12
Seat 1: SirFWALGMan (5,610)
Seat 2: fjordis (5,340)
Seat 5: Mindiana (2,550)
SirFWALGMan posts the small blind of 50
fjordis posts the big blind of 100
The button is in seat #5
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [7d Td]
Mindiana folds
SirFWALGMan calls 50
fjordis checks
*** FLOP *** [9h Jc 4c]
SirFWALGMan checks
fjordis bets 100
SirFWALGMan calls 100
*** TURN *** [9h Jc 4c] [Kh]
SirFWALGMan checks
fjordis bets 200
SirFWALGMan calls 200
*** RIVER *** [9h Jc 4c Kh] [Qd]
SirFWALGMan bets 5,210, and is all in
fjordis calls 4,940, and is all in
Uncalled bet of 270 returned to SirFWALGMan
*** SHOW DOWN ***
SirFWALGMan shows [7d Td] a straight, King high
fjordis mucks
SirFWALGMan wins the pot (10,680) with a straight, King high
fjordis stands up
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 10,680 | Rake 0
Board: [9h Jc 4c Kh Qd]
Seat 1: SirFWALGMan (small blind) showed [7d Td] and won (10,680) with a straight, King high
Seat 2: fjordis (big blind) mucked [4h Js] - two pair, Jacks and Fours
Seat 5: Mindiana (button) didn't bet (folded)

Friday, April 11, 2008

Divine Trinity

Today the subway was full of Red Sox and Yankee fans making my commute a horror show. It was terrible. SO I decide to walk from Copley to Fenway and jump on the train after the retards. I am crossing the street and as always I spend extra time waiting for the white walk sign. All of the sudden a taxi come flying at me from nowhere.

Remember how I said I wanted to be more Waffle like in person. Well I let into this fucking Taxi driver so hard. I called him a fucking idiot and a moron and a stupid retard and told him to go fuck off and gave him the middle finger. All at the top of my lungs. All while walking the few inches to the curb. Fucking asshole could he not see the BRIGHT FUCKING WHITE WALK SIGNAL!!!!! I hate idiots.

SO now I am wondering if the evil Waffles, being denied ranting lately, has come out in real life. Will he take over the real life? How about Nice Waffles? We he start to win at poker and be a huge success? Can I handle having three personalities? A divine trinity of insanity if you will. I think this whole thing might end badly.

Been a Crazy Week

Been an incredible and crazy week. On the BBT3 front it has been very good.

Monday at the Hoy - 18th, 3 Outer
Tuesday Skillz Game - 7th, 1 Outer
Wednesday - Victory Biatches!
Thursday Riverchasers - 10th, 3 Outer (Cost me the game, but then I had to jam 6's into Aces)

I think if I can keep consistent I have a good shot to do some things in this contest.

I have also resurrected my Pokerstars account from nothingness. If you have some Stars points but no cash I highly recommend the 70-point SNG for 11 T$. I played this. Won. Then I won an SNG. Then I took ninth in a 180-peep. Wallah I have a hundred bucks on the site now. The low level SNG play in these games is AMAZINGLY bad. A million times worse than Fulltilt and I recommend them for anyone looking to build a bankroll.

The FullTilt bankroll is also growing slowly. It is at 280ish now. No complaints there at all. I have been also hitting mostly SNGs on Fulltilt. I can branch out a little and win a token here or there now also. Hopefully some good things can happen.

As far as the improvement front I am really working on my attitude. I have never really had fun playing poker. I have enjoyed it. I have liked the challenge. I have liked winning. I just never really just sat back and fucked the results and just enjoyed the goddamn game for what it is. Obviously in a game where the best hand loses a lot this is difficult. So slowly but surely I am trying to change my mindset and just have fun. Hopefully this will help with the "other" aspects of the game and give me some success. Either way I do not think I can lose going down this path.

Big Congrats to the Traitor for winning his seat also. Go and give him a pat on the back.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

No Repeat

No back to back tonight as I bubbled. The big hand was QQ vs A9 and then as a shorty I jammed sixes into aces. Ouchie. Oh well. It was fun and I put a big hurting on CMitch as a 40/60 dog.. and then finished him off with AQ. Gained a few points on Loretta, lost a few points on Bayne. Pretty much a push. Did get to play with LJ again for a little while.

I started taking Melatonin to get some more sleep. It says it may "Cause more vivid dreams about CK!".. WOOOOT! It is right on Wiki go check.

Gnight peeps.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008


BOOOM! I knew my day was coming. I can now embrace brother Mookie with open arms once again instead of bitter hatred. I have finally won my TOC seat. I have gained a few hundred on Bayne in our competition and best of all I am the first place winner for the first time in a long time.

First I would like to congratulate LJ on a tough fought battle. She is a true warrior and can play this game much better than I can. I really had to stay on my toes and adjust to beat her. You are a beautiful woman and a monster poker player and I am SURE you are going to win a TOC seat.

Secondly I would like to thank Hoyazo and Fuel. I totally lucked into a huge stack against them. Fuel was raising a lot and being aggressive. Hoyazo decided to look him up with sevens which were ahead of him and I sat back and waited with Aces. No skill there folks. Just good timing.

I enjoyed playing the final couple of tables. I had some of my favorite people there including Poker Peaker, Bam Bam, Gary, CK and Kat. Poker should be fun and with these guys it always is. Thank you all.

All the girlie chat friends who wished me well I really would not be playing poker without you.

I am totally exhausted and happy I could put the TOC seat behind me and move up in the monthly rankings. I will continue to play my best and see what happens. Good night to you all. A kinder, gentler, Waffles.

Gotta Run

Doing nice thing for the kid and bailing from work at 2:30. So quick post. I am certainly trying to keep my cool more in these games. Poker SHOULD be fun. Period. However I am human and when someone hits one out in a hand they never should have gone past 4th or 5th or 1st street with... I do tend to get a little upset. I also will thank profoundly Loretta for gut-shotting ANI as he totally deserved it. I also think Loretta is someone who deserves a TOC seat as his writing is profound and his play is usually excellent.

I will not answer Bayne's asinine question which asks me to compare committing half your chips to a pot with a gutter draw as opposed to a small portion. I am used to Bayne not getting it. He is kinda slow.

Tonight that rat bastard Mookie is putting on his MTT again. Feel free to come and play. The password is vegas1. It is a toss up as to how well I do in these. I am much better with a deep stack type game. It allows me to play my game early and get a huge stack for later disappointment. However I will see how far I can get. I will say I am extremely excited though. It takes a one fucking out hand for you numbskulls to knock me out and I KNOW I can dodge that once in a while and when I do it is over and I am winning the TOC. You heard it here first.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Aniguy and his Ace high nothing

So Aniguy commits a huge chunk of his stack with an amazing gutshot draw. Ace high. Until 7th street. Not even a draw until 5th. Meanwhile I am raising and re-raising my two pair and getting called by his donkfoolery and walla.. he hits his miracle card. The absolute best part of the whole thing if you look at the hand history is TWO of the nines were already out. One by Mattazuma as a door card and one by me on 6th. So sick. I would really like to finish one of these games. I am so glad Mini-Donk is learning from Riggs.

Full Tilt Poker Game #5961740288: Skill Series (40521484), Table 4 - 2500/5000 Ante 400 - Limit Stud H/L - 1:01:34 ET - 2008/04/09
Seat 1: NumbBono (48,184)
Seat 2: Mattazuma (12,424)
Seat 3: kurokitty (27,537)
Seat 4: RNallin (11,760)
Seat 5: SirFWALGMan (11,823)
Seat 6: pvanharibo (18,319)
Seat 7: Loretta8 (55,456)
Seat 8: ANIguy (48,497)
NumbBono antes 400
Mattazuma antes 400
kurokitty antes 400
RNallin antes 400
SirFWALGMan antes 400
pvanharibo antes 400
Loretta8 antes 400
ANIguy antes 400
*** 3RD STREET ***
Dealt to NumbBono [Kc]
Dealt to Mattazuma [9s]
Dealt to kurokitty [Qd]
Dealt to RNallin [3h]
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [Ks 3c] [Kd]
Dealt to pvanharibo [6s]
Dealt to Loretta8 [4s]
Dealt to ANIguy [As]
RNallin is low with [3h]
RNallin brings in for 800
SirFWALGMan completes it to 2,500
pvanharibo folds
Loretta8 calls 2,500
ANIguy calls 2,500
NumbBono folds
Mattazuma folds
kurokitty folds
RNallin calls 1,700
*** 4TH STREET ***
Dealt to RNallin [3h] [Kh]
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [Ks 3c Kd] [5c]
Dealt to Loretta8 [4s] [Td]
Dealt to ANIguy [As] [Tc]
ANIguy checks
RNallin checks
SirFWALGMan bets 2,500
Loretta8 folds
ANIguy calls 2,500
RNallin calls 2,500
*** 5TH STREET ***
Dealt to RNallin [3h Kh] [Jd]
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [Ks 3c Kd 5c] [3d]
Dealt to ANIguy [As Tc] [Jc]
ANIguy checks
RNallin checks
SirFWALGMan bets 5,000
ANIguy calls 5,000
RNallin calls 5,000
*** 6TH STREET ***
Dealt to RNallin [3h Kh Jd] [2c]
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [Ks 3c Kd 5c 3d] [9d]
Dealt to ANIguy [As Tc Jc] [2h]
ANIguy checks
RNallin checks
SirFWALGMan bets 1,423, and is all in
ANIguy calls 1,423
RNallin calls 1,360, and is all in
SirFWALGMan shows [Ks 3c Kd 5c 3d 9d]
ANIguy shows [7s 8s As Tc Jc 2h]
RNallin shows [6h 9h 3h Kh Jd 2c]
*** 7TH STREET ***
Dealt to RNallin [6h 9h 3h Kh Jd 2c] [7c]
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [Ks 3c Kd 5c 3d 9d] [Ts]
Dealt to ANIguy [7s 8s As Tc Jc 2h] [9c]
SirFWALGMan shows [Ks 3c Kd 5c 3d 9d Ts] two pair, Kings and Threes, for high
ANIguy shows [7s 8s As Tc Jc 2h 9c] a straight, Jack high, for high
ANIguy wins the side pot (126) with a straight, Jack high
RNallin shows [6h 9h 3h Kh Jd 2c 7c] King Jack high, for high
ANIguy wins the main pot (39,780) with a straight, Jack high
RNallin stands up
SirFWALGMan stands up
No low hand qualified
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 39,906 Main pot 39,780. Side pot 126. | Rake 0
Seat 1: NumbBono folded on 3rd St.
Seat 2: Mattazuma folded on 3rd St.
Seat 3: kurokitty folded on 3rd St.
Seat 4: RNallin showed [6h 9h 3h Kh Jd 2c 7c] and lost with HI: King Jack high
Seat 5: SirFWALGMan showed [Ks 3c Kd 5c 3d 9d Ts] and lost with HI: two pair, Kings and Threes
Seat 6: pvanharibo folded on 3rd St.
Seat 7: Loretta8 folded on 4th St.
Seat 8: ANIguy showed [7s 8s As Tc Jc 2h 9c] and won (39,906) with HI: a straight, Jack high

Bigger, Longer, Better and Uncut Baby

Do you talk too much in your blog?
Created by OnePlusYou

Uplifting the Bloggers

I figure I should prop up some of the good bloggers who support this blog and enhance the flow of positive energy around this place. Before I do that though I bought the Audio Tape:Learn Poker the Sucko way. Here are a few excerpts:

Sucko: Derrr... I have lot of chip.. Derrr
Sucko: Derrr... I have 23o .. Derrr...
Sucko: Derrr... JAM ALL IN .. Derrr...

I am learning a lot from this tape. Really. Like I said in my comment section I can not see how jamming the nuts is a bad thing when I get called EVERY SINGLE TIME.

So anyyywaayyy.. First off welcome a new read Neil. Reading his blog it seems like he is just starting out so let's encourage him to stick around. That way we can abuse him later.

Secondly the outrageously hot, sexy and yes scary lady Joannda has written one of the best posts about life, love, the pursuit of seventy hours a week, and all the crazy shit that goes into being human. I was really deeply touched by her post and can really relate to a lot of what she said. If you have not read it you suck.

I have noticed that Pokerstars SNG players are wayyyyyyy worse than Full Tilt SNG players. This could be good.

Also big huge congrats to Mini-Donk for taking second in the Tuckfard Fucktard HORSE event. No small feat with the likes of Pushmonkeyfucker and BamBam in that thing. I put a bounty on Pushmonkeys head and he was taken out on the bubble! BOOYAH! It looked bad for Mini-Donk with about five left but she got her head together after a sick suckout and went from last to first and finally lost in HU action. I predict big things for her in the future.

WAFFLES FACT OF THE DAY: NOT Only women can have multiple orgasms.

Females are not alone in their ability to reach bliss time and time again. Men too can experience several non-ejaculatory orgasms in a row during a single sex session. This happens when: (A) A man has been strengthening his pelvic floor muscles for greater control in postponing his ultimate pleasure; and (B) He has learned to back off from that moment of his sexual response cycle known as the “point of ejaculatory inevitability.” It is when a man can postpone his response that he’s likely to have an even greater orgasmic applause.

I am looking into this "Pelvic Floor Muscle" thing to see what exercises I need to do. Hell it is on Foxnews it has to be true right?

Tonight I might be in the Skillz game. I have signed up but not sure if I will be there exactly at the starting time. We shall see. I may have to stop by my old work and milk some more money out of them. Hopefully not but money is good.

Monday, April 07, 2008


First off before I get to the hand with BamBam I will say I got totally fucked out of the Monday at the Hoyazo. I mean ok, I would not have BEEN in a position to get fucked if I did not put a nasty hurt on Evy. What are the chances I am behind three hands in a row with Evy though? Gah! She got me good. I also made a really dumb play against Smokkee. With eighteen left though I have about 15 blinds and some dickhead friend of Sucko's raises with AQ for the umpteenth time. I look down and jam AK. It is around 4k for him to call and he has a 24K stack.. So while it is a big call it is in no way huge. Anyway. My AK is WYAYYYYYYYAAYAYAYAYA ahead of his AQ. Until the Qxx two of my suit flop then with 12 outs 2x over I am slightly behind. I never catch up. Would have been nice to have a top ten stack with 18 left. Oh well. I swear everyone likes being dominated. It is retarded.

Anyway I made my share of retarded plays so I guess it all evens out in the long run. I do not think my play against BamBam was retarded however. Only because I could put him on an exact hand and if my hand hit it was well disguised (apparently).

Full Tilt Poker Game #5947064657: Mondays at the Hoy (45101230), Table 11 - 25/50 - No Limit Hold'em - 22:25:44 ET - 2008/04/07
Seat 1: ScottMc (566)
Seat 2: PokerBrian322 (9,175)
Seat 3: Murfeeslaw (4,120)
Seat 4: BamBamCan (4,239)
Seat 5: SirFWALGMan (4,160)
Seat 6: zackklemm (5,270)
PokerBrian322 posts the small blind of 25
Murfeeslaw posts the big blind of 50
The button is in seat #1
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [9c Tc]
Evy35 (Observer): i saw that makes you much too boring lol j/k
BamBamCan raises to 100
SirFWALGMan calls 100
SirFWALGMan: lol
zackklemm folds
ScottMc folds
SirFWALGMan: MRMBJC Bam <===== Min Raises make baby jesus cry Bam that is NOT nice
PokerBrian322 calls 75
Murfeeslaw calls 50
*** FLOP *** [Jc 7s 4d] <===== Gutshot draw my specialty!
PokerBrian322 checks
Evy35 (Observer): how's the song go...
Murfeeslaw checks
BamBamCan bets 400 <==== Good bet my friend.
Evy35 (Observer): 'i love you just the way you areeeeeee"
SirFWALGMan calls 400 <==== I call because I feel it and if I hit I can double.
PokerBrian322 folds
Murfeeslaw folds
*** TURN *** [Jc 7s 4d] [8c]
BamBamCan bets 1,200
SirFWALGMan raises to 3,660, and is all in <==== Boom. Sucko says this is bad but it works a lot!
BamBamCan calls 2,460 <==== Suckah!
SirFWALGMan shows [9c Tc]
BamBamCan shows [As Ac]
*** RIVER *** [Jc 7s 4d 8c] [5s]
SirFWALGMan shows a straight, Jack high
BamBamCan shows a pair of Aces
SirFWALGMan wins the pot (8,520) with a straight, Jack high
SirFWALGMan: gg
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 8,520 | Rake 0
Board: [Jc 7s 4d 8c 5s]
Seat 1: ScottMc (button) didn't bet (folded)
Seat 2: PokerBrian322 (small blind) folded on the Flop
Seat 3: Murfeeslaw (big blind) folded on the Flop
Seat 4: BamBamCan showed [As Ac] and lost with a pair of Aces
Seat 5: SirFWALGMan showed [9c Tc] and won (8,520) with a straight, Jack high
Seat 6: zackklemm didn't bet (folded)

Tough hand for Bam there honestly. When he leads the turn for 1200 he is just mine. If you are a MATH nerd like Bayne you have to call here. If you are an intuitive player you can fold knowing your pair is beat. I am not sure which is the right move in the long run. Comments?

NCAA Final Pick

I would be remiss if I did not put up my final pick. I am going Kansas all the way baby. So be sure to watch tonight. Also in other news my backer has outed himself. Go give him hell. As much confidence as he has in me I will make sure to not let him down. My heart overflowed with joy when he spoke the words

Now, most of the time I only stake people because I think it is +EV, but I doubt this one to be the case. I only did it because if I didn’t stake him, when would I get the chance to hear him berate other dumbass bloggers?

Alas I am trying to be a kinder gentler Waffles. I repeatably had to chant my new mantra during the 180-peep on Stars the other day "Poker is fun! Poker is fun! Poker is fun!".. as my AQ went down in flames to some jackelopes A3o. One thing that has stuck with me from chatting with MiamiDon and others is you do not EVER want to jam a weak Ace.. wait for those two cards that are likely to be live. I did however make the nine spot for a little profit and have a small roll on PokerStars as well as a growing roll on FullTilt.

I know this is a fucking mistake but I have a serious question for those of you who have played with me before and have watched me over the years.

On the highest level what do you think should I be playing Cash, MTT, or SNG, a mix of multiples? Any specific kind?

I am kind of curious. I try cash every once in a while but for me it always seems like you spend a week making a buyin or so and then you get all in with a set of tens against KJo on a 2 heart board, he has TPTK no draws as all.. and the two hearts come to bail his ass out of the fire and get you even for the week.

So the tourney player equivalent to the cash game would probably be the single table SNG. You have to play a lot of these to profit but essentially it works as well as cash for generating sustainable income. I would think loss of focus after playing the 10,000 SNG of the week would be a big problem. Possible solve this by mixing it up between NLHE, PLO, PLO8, and other forms as they fill up.

Last would be the MTT only route. I really do not think I have even close to the bankroll to do this. A successful MTT player from what I see plays 20 MTTs a night and goes months without scoring anything and then finally they hit that 10K score and walla they are ballahs. I think I will mix in some MTT play of course but relying on that for your bankroll growth is tough.

See you all tonight at the Hoy. Password Hammer. Get your tokens before they are all gone!

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Perhaps Nice is Good?

I wonder if this Karma thing is maybe real.. How did this guy not have a queen? Normally in my existence he has Q7 95% of the time.. yet, he did not, and I won. How does this happen? Is being nice going to change my poker game? Much to ponder.

Full Tilt Poker Game #5926279342: Table Indian Hills - $0.05/$0.10 - $3 Cap No Limit Hold'em - 12:20:28 ET - 2008/04/06
Seat 2: I DRPMAN I ($3.25)
Seat 3: gwamjj ($2.90)
Seat 4: djbungo ($2.75)
Seat 5: BSG2010 ($14.30)
Seat 6: Metro--ite ($2.85)
Seat 7: SirFWALGMan ($8.05)
Seat 8: -Co60- ($6.50)
Seat 9: NigelMcCool ($6.25)
-Co60- posts the small blind of $0.05
NigelMcCool posts the big blind of $0.10
The button is in seat #7
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [Kh Kd]
piaowin adds $3
gwamjj folds
djbungo folds
BSG2010 calls $0.10
Metro--ite folds
djbungo stands up
SirFWALGMan raises to $0.45
-Co60- folds
NigelMcCool folds
BSG2010 calls $0.35
*** FLOP *** [7s 9h Qh]
BSG2010 checks
SirFWALGMan bets $1.05
C-GIBBZ sits down
BSG2010 calls $1.05
*** TURN *** [7s 9h Qh] [5c]
C-GIBBZ adds $8
BSG2010 checks
SirFWALGMan bets $1.50, and is capped
BSG2010 calls $1.50, and is capped
SirFWALGMan shows [Kh Kd]
BSG2010 shows [Kc Ad]
*** RIVER *** [7s 9h Qh 5c] [Qs]
SirFWALGMan shows two pair, Kings and Queens
BSG2010 shows a pair of Queens
SirFWALGMan wins the pot ($5.55) with two pair, Kings and Queens
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $6.15 | Rake $0.60
Board: [7s 9h Qh 5c Qs]
Seat 2: I DRPMAN I is sitting out
Seat 3: gwamjj didn't bet (folded)
Seat 4: djbungo didn't bet (folded)
Seat 5: BSG2010 showed [Kc Ad] and lost with a pair of Queens
Seat 6: Metro--ite didn't bet (folded)
Seat 7: SirFWALGMan (button) showed [Kh Kd] and won ($5.55) with two pair, Kings and Queens
Seat 8: -Co60- (small blind) folded before the Flop
Seat 9: NigelMcCool (big blind) folded before the Flop

Exhibit Two:

I meant to call a .40 cent raise pre-flop, but the guy jams all in and I click call by accident. So I am pissed because I just got back to even. However this nice Karma thing may be good... I typed in chat afterwards "Sorry, Misclick".

Full Tilt Poker Game #5926339678: Table Indian Hills - $0.05/$0.10 - $3 Cap No Limit Hold'em - 12:25:58 ET - 2008/04/06
Seat 1: piaowin ($2.85)
Seat 2: I DRPMAN I ($3.10)
Seat 3: gwamjj ($0.45)
Seat 4: C-GIBBZ ($7.90)
Seat 5: BSG2010 ($11.70), is sitting out
Seat 6: Metro--ite ($2.85)
Seat 7: SirFWALGMan ($10.75)
Seat 8: -Co60- ($6.05)
Seat 9: NigelMcCool ($8.35)
C-GIBBZ posts the small blind of $0.05
Metro--ite posts the big blind of $0.10
The button is in seat #3
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to SirFWALGMan [8h 7h]
SirFWALGMan calls $0.10
-Co60- folds
NigelMcCool has 15 seconds left to act
NigelMcCool calls $0.10
piaowin folds
I DRPMAN I has 15 seconds left to act
I DRPMAN I raises to $0.55
gwamjj calls $0.45, and is all in
C-GIBBZ folds
Metro--ite has 15 seconds left to act
Metro--ite raises to $2.85, and is all in
SirFWALGMan calls $2.75
NigelMcCool has 15 seconds left to act
NigelMcCool folds
I DRPMAN I folds
Metro--ite shows [Ad Jd]
SirFWALGMan shows [8h 7h]
gwamjj shows [Qs Ah]
*** FLOP *** [7s 5s 6c]
*** TURN *** [7s 5s 6c] [8s]
*** RIVER *** [7s 5s 6c 8s] [Jh]
Metro--ite shows a pair of Jacks
SirFWALGMan shows two pair, Eights and Sevens
SirFWALGMan wins the side pot ($4.40) with two pair, Eights and Sevens
gwamjj shows Ace Queen high
SirFWALGMan wins the main pot ($1.80) with two pair, Eights and Sevens
gwamjj adds $3
Metro--ite adds $3.90
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $6.85 Main pot $1.95. Side pot $4.90. | Rake $0.65
Board: [7s 5s 6c 8s Jh]
Seat 1: piaowin didn't bet (folded)
Seat 2: I DRPMAN I folded before the Flop
Seat 3: gwamjj (button) showed [Qs Ah] and lost with Ace Queen high
Seat 4: C-GIBBZ (small blind) folded before the Flop
Seat 5: BSG2010 is sitting out
Seat 6: Metro--ite (big blind) showed [Ad Jd] and lost with a pair of Jacks
Seat 7: SirFWALGMan showed [8h 7h] and won ($6.20) with two pair, Eights and Sevens
Seat 8: -Co60- didn't bet (folded)
Seat 9: NigelMcCool folded before the Flop

Saturday, April 05, 2008

Out with People

So today I actually went outside. I figured I would do something a little different. I first went and tried to return some games we bought at Hollywood Video. The fucktard at the counter tells me I can not return it. They must put it in a machine and fix it. I ask if it will work for sure and he says he is not positive. I told him I would be very angry if I had to make a second trip back. You would not like me when I am angry.

SO my second mission there was to get the kiddo some Mario Brother's fighting game with the refund from the other two games. Now since I could not get a refund that was not happening.. but I am a softy so I decide to get him a game anyways. I figure I will go to Gamestop and see what they have. They really have a terrible selection especially for Nintendo Game Cube which is what the boy has right now. So I call him up and tell him that the store does not have the game and I do not think it is for the Gamecube anyway and he goes ballistic on me. Fucking little ingrate. Seriously I love the kid but he does not have a clue how good he has it. So I tell him I will take him tomorrow. Of course his idiot mom takes him out as soon as I get home. She fucking ruins them so bad. Oh well.

On a side note I think when the Gamestop guy said "Giigle pop is way overpowered dude, you should not get Meele".. It was pretty gayyy.. and I should have stormed out right there.

SO I go and get my hair cut. I think they girl who did my hair was an idiot but she had big boobs so that helped. She was pretty hot but did not use it to get a good tip. The hairdressers that I will tip good are the ones who rub there cunts up on you when cutting.. and stick there tits in your face. Now those are the professionals.

After that I continue my hunt for the illusive and highly dangerous elliptical trainer. I have been searching for one for around four months but have not been able to find it. It has hidden itself deep in the jungle. So I get to the local Sears and try one out. After about 1 minute of ellipations I look down at the heart monitor and it reads 144!!! I think I was having a heart attack at this time. So I stop and massage my aching thigh musclesflab and check out the next machine. Now this one I know will kill me. It has BLACKJACK. You have to keep moving to play though. If you stop the game is over. If you keep going your life is over. Hard choice. Scary.

Finally I get out of there with a few picks in hand. I am trying to decide between a nice model like this Nordic Track for like eight bills or something from like Proform like this for like three bills. I do like the fact that the bigger ones have built in programs but is that worth five hundred? Not sure.

One last thing. I have to say I will NOT be buying my machine from Sears. I found the sales staff to be totally uninterested in talking to me and pretty fucking retarded. I am used to this from women but not from sales people. Screw you dickhead. I do not dress up for my cushy day job no fucking way am I going to put on a suit so you will sell me a machine. You can suck my ass.

I left the Sears and this beautiful Israeli woman comes up to me and grabs both my hands and starts stroking them. She purrs "Your hands are soooo soft.. are you an artist?".. As Kat always tells me, "Your hands are freakishly soft". I quickly check my wallet to make sure it is still there and reply "No, Programmer". She continues to stroke me as she leads me over to this small out of the way cart and she asks if I know why my nails are ridged. She tells me it is because I do not moisturize my nails. I reply, coyly, "I thought it was because I ate them". She then gets a giant block and starts polishing one nail. It really sorta creeped me out. She stopped and asked if it hurt. Normally I would think that would be the man's question but I told her no.. it was just kinda weird feeling. She finished up by moisturizing my cuticle.
When she asked if my wife was around it kind of broke the mood. So I decided not to buy any softening supplies from her. I did get a free moisture pack which I promptly gave to the wife as a gift! BOOM! So now I am walking around like a freak with one polished nail. Freaky.

Anyway all of this has confirmed to me that socializing with humanity is not a good idea. I shall try not to do it very often. Until later.

Holy Crap! LOVE IT!

This has GOT to be the best post I have read in over five years.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Cashed in the Lovely Riverchasing Event

I got the Psychology of Poker today. It said I may be delusional. I may burn it in the fire tonight.
- Me

Much thanks to Ingoal who sent me three books for my helping him get something or other we will not mention in case there are ramifications. Anyway he chose the Psychology of Poker I & II, and the wonderful Phil Gordon and his charming Blue Book.

I look forward to reading those in between my continuing adventures with the Dark Elf Drizzt. Not to be confused by the dark mooded Drizzle.

I had a most enjoyable night playing against everyone. Everyone played so well it was stunning. I thought Swimmom played a great game tonight and Katiemom may actually win the whole thing. She took me out in fifth or sixth place tonight when I rejammed her A9 as a short stack with J9. Excellent read and I do hope you win. CK even made an appearance in the chat and lightened up everyones day. She is such a sweet person.

I look forward to continuing my friendly wager with the incomparable Mr. Bayne. It is such a joy to challenge each other in a nice gentlemanly way. As he pointed out, and rightly so, I have yet to make as much as he has in any BBT. However I see this as a fabulous mountain such as the ones the daring Mr. Peaker climbs and I look forward to trying my mettle against it's summit. It will be a daunting task to get ahead of Bayne and his excellent play but I shall endeavor to do my best.

I also read that some famous poker player was caught being naughty with an escort. Now this is very intriguing. I am not sure who it is yet but I think it might be Mr. Doyle Brunson. Perhaps he paid her to change his poopie diapers. It would be nice to be super rich.

Last but not least.. as much fun as I have had teasing Sir. Astin I must set the record straight, no pun intended, and let everyone know that he is most definitely
not of the homosexual persuasion. Of course we would all accept and love him the same if he was but I believe him when he says he has had many women and likes lesbian movies. If that is not straight I do not know what is. Good show!!

Anyhow I will probably be playing a little on the weekend and see how things go. Good luck to you all in this game we love and remember: it is just a game. I wish large pots pushed your way and well played cards to you all. Goodnight.


I have been reading a ton about the railbirds and the rude comments thrown about. Now I understand that being rude in chat is not the funnest thing. I am constantly victimized by the hatahs and the jealous fuckers who wish they were as good as me. I get badmouthed by everyone from AlCantHang to Sucko and everyone in between. Point in case whenever I get close to the money I get thousands of negative chat messages calling me a donkey and telling me I have no chance at all. Lucky for me I have something called: SELF CONFIDENCE. If someone calls me an idiot or a donkey or says I can not play I just shrug it off to their jealousy and lack of understanding about even the most basic fundamentals of poker. This means you Sucko.

The solution that some people have come up with is to stick around and say "Good Game".. "Good luck all".. while silently kicking their cat and throwing the keyboard across the wall. I mean what kind of solution is that? Do people really like living as hypocrites? I almost always cringe when someone says "good game".. after some dooshbag called off his entire 30BB stack with top pair three kicker. It was not a fucking good game.. it was a fucking retarded game and you should be fucking shot and dumped in a trash can. Ok. Possibly I go too far. However you get the point.

Now calling someone a fucktard in the chat window is probably not a nice thing to do but is it really that hard to deal with? Guys like Scott Fishy-man and any of the pro players have to deal with that shit all the time. Just ignore it. Pass it off as someone being mad at losing. It is a totally understandable reaction to being a loser. If you were happy you lost then you really would be a fucktard.

I normally try to not berate people in the chat when they make stupid plays against me. I have a moderate success rate at doing this. I get a lot of practice though and perhaps someday I will be a little nicer all the time. I am not against being slightly nicer. I will not ever tell some dick who called off his entire stack with shit that he played a "good game" though.

So basically just deal with it. The age of the bitching out in chat is upon us and I doubt it ever leaves. We all tend to be more open and honest when the medium is computer communication be that girlie chat or poker chat windows and I do not think it is a bad thing. I am happy to know when someone hates a play I make and more than happy to show them why they are wrong. If they will not listen then that is a loss for them. Until next time. Peace.

Not Feeling It

Not feeling the blogging thing right now. I dunno. People say they love reading and all that shit but I am in the blahs. I even got a nice complement from someone yesterday who said my blog is their first read of the day. *blush*. It was a MILF too!

Anyhooo... Last night in the Mookie is a fucktard MTT I ignored my read as I often do against people I have never played against and went out early. I actually thought about the hand and could not justify calling so I decided either fold or jam. I am not happy about not listening to my instincts but it happens. I am a lot better against people I know and tend to trust my reads more. Next time I play this dick his obvious tell will lead to his ruin. Beware!

At least I outlasted Sucko and many thanks to that retard Fuel for crippling Bayne! WOOOT! So the bet stands the same as it was yesterday.

I have to apologize to Astin also. I was just kidding when I called him a fag. I never in a million years thought he was gay.. but then my IM started flaring up and I got no less than forty IM messages saying "Dude, you know Astin really is gay?". I was like "No fucking way?".. So I am sorry man. If I knew I would just call you a jackass or fucktard like everyone else.

I also would like to reiterate my hate everyone policy. I am not against blacks, gays, jews, whites, or any other majority or minority.. I am against ALL OF YOU.. I hate EVERYONE and EVERYTHING. I am the one true equal opportunity hater. Besides without the gays Carmen would not have sexy apparel to wear. We would all be going around in burlap sacks and walking naked in our living rooms without curtains. So here's to you gay people! Rock on!

I liked F-Trains attempt at an April fools joke. It was pretty funny. I mean would anyone think that some whipped puppy dog fool who rode with stinky old people across 4 states to get to his masters side would EVER get his junk felt in a bar with her breathing? I mean come on. You might as well have said I won a huge MTT or something. Jesus. Try harder next year please.

I did like Amatay's "I went busto" post. I think it more of a future prediction than an April fools joke but I hope the guy does well. He is a great player I think but the way he talks seems so results oriented. I just think that doom is marching right behind him and that his nature MIGHT eventually catch up. I hope I am wrong. We shall see.

One of my favorite new sites is "Hot Chicks with Douchebags". Do guys that dress like that really get chicks? No wonder I have never understood women. Wow.

I really started this post out meaning it to be a good Karma post. God am I fucked up. Screw you Karma. I so wanna kick your ass you fucking scumsucker sitting in judgment over me. Fuck you. Go back and lick your mommas ass you wanna be fate. Cocksucking Karma.

Riverfuckers is tonight and I think this is usually one of my best events. Deep stacks, patience, and Donkeys to end all donkeys makes this a +EV event. I look forward to making a huge leap up against Bayne tonight. Peace.