Bloggers are Fishy

Do you need more proof? Here is my Poker Tracker ranking of the top loosers I have seen play NLHE.



If you see your name there.. You must be a fish.

I finished a fishtastic 11th in the Hoyazo tonight. Totally pissed off at the game tonight really. I hoped for a better finish.. although Jeciimd was Bubble Boy in the points tonight which is kind of funny. I guess he may have taken what I said to heart and decided to play.. NAHHHH..

And now for something different..

While you're here, check out how I got nailed for a $860 pot in a donkeyment confrontation that I think never should have happened. I can only play a hand so perfectly, but sometimes the poker gods rape my anus for a huge pile anyways, no matter how little regard for his money the donkey at the table shows.

I call a pot-raise preflop with pocket JTs. S00ted connectors you know! I flop TPTK, Chaaa ching!! and figure it is probably good here. Seeing that my opponent is the incredible donk of legend: HOYAZO, I decide to masterfully give him some rope to hang himself with.



Instead of doing a standard c-bet Hoyazo then decides to check behind me. He knows he is likely behind and somehow resists the urge to bet into me. I might have given him credit for a strong hand here if he bet out but his weakness lets me know the real deal.



So now we come to the turn and it is a pretty little six. I have now used my incredible deductive skills and narrowed his hand down to AK. It is time to rope my dope in. He has one card left to come and I know if I show weakness I can pull him into this hand.



OK so even though I called his pot-raise preflop, and an Jack fell on the flop , donkey raises me 360 into a $260 pot. He has to figure he's beat here and drawing to just two overcards, but I guess he feels compelled to throw out the standard size raise anyways. It's pronounced FORM - yew - lay - ik. Well, I've learned from some of the hands I've had up on the blog this week, and all the comments I've received -- let him bluff off MORE chips to me. I mean let's review here. I am a 86% favorite and I am letting this donkey bet into me. He has misplayed this hand from the very beginning and I have trapped him brilliantly. Now I just need to avoid that 13% chance on the river and I will be able to take down a nice pot.



A $960 pot, raped from me and given to the donkey who not only can't keep himself from betting out with a clear loser on the turn, but he couldn't even fold to my nice bet on the turn. That generous man might as well have been writing me a check when he called that turn raise. Donks who just can't get away from their hands, even when they get caught essentialy bluffing with just two outs. Un. fucking. Believable.

This has been a Hot Hand of the day brought to you by the Letter H and the Cartoon Character Grey Box McGruffy the crime square.

At least I took my wrath out on the 3/6 Razz table to the toon of a $150 pot to pay for the Hoyazo and my cash game escapades of the day. Break even never felt so good. Serves those fuckers right for calling me down with a 987 and KJJ. Fuckers. My 7 is all powerful! Even if I rivered it. See you Wednesday at the Mookie!

The Puker Race

Instead of the Bracelet race I decided to join the Puker Race. I started off strong puking at my Son's Soccer game.. then I made a mid-game SURGE puking all over my bed.. I finally exploded at the end and finished last at the toilet bowl. My tummy hurts.

Anyway.. I am home today.. Before I got sick I ended up having a decent comeback in the cash games this weekend.. making a nice 3x buyin' triple up at 2/4 Razzamatazz and a two buyin win at NLHE cash. Bankroll still at starter levels of 450 but moving in the right direction for the moment.

Since I have nothing else for you.. Here is something from Katitude.. http://www.mytoons.com/animation/play/1536.

Frustrating Night

I played some 1/2 NLHE last night with the Blogger crew. All the usual suspects. All night I was card dead and finally got some good cards when Sucko showed up. He berated me in a play where I made like $150. The flop comes all hearts and I cold call his initial bet and raise him another 90-100 on the turn. He cold calls that. He folds to my $50 river bet. He then says I gave him odds to suckout on me. I ask the standard question "What did you put me on?" and he could not answer that.. SO how the hell does he know I gave him odds for anything? I easily could have had the nut flush.. or Aces and Kings with the K of hearts.. or maybe I totally read his weak ass attempt to steal the pot and had nothing at all. It is hard to say I have odds for anything if you do not know what I had. In addition to that IF he was drawing to some sort of heart which I would think was likely.. AND assuming I did not have a bigger heart because we know you were drawing to some low ass heart THEN he is going to hit his hand on the turn 1:6 times or some fucked up number like that... so if he had $600 in implied odds when calling my bet when I had $80 left behind then yeah he was given perfect odds. Thanks for the donations though. Without you I would be down for the past few nights. I honestly have a lot of respect for Sucko's game but I do not think I gave odds for anything except making some money.

Here is the hand History because I am notorious for mixing things up:

lucko21 raises to $7
jeciimd folds
smokkee folds
GSW16 folds
doom_aces folds
bwileypt folds
SirFWALGMan calls $7
MiamiDon folds
butchhoward folds
*** FLOP *** [7h Th Ah]
lucko21 bets $12
SirFWALGMan calls $12
*** TURN *** [7h Th Ah] [3s]
lucko21 bets $28
SirFWALGMan raises to $70
lucko21 has 15 seconds left to act
lucko21 calls $42
*** RIVER *** [7h Th Ah 3s] [Jc]
lucko21 checks
SirFWALGMan bets $50
lucko21 folds
Uncalled bet of $50 returned to SirFWALGMan
SirFWALGMan mucks
lucko21 adds $35.45
SirFWALGMan wins the pot ($178)


I took my new found winnings and played some 25/NL to end the night. For the second night in a row I run Kings into Aces. Ouch. When am I going to find these alleged fish who push pre-flop with Queens? Jesus. So I basically broke even for the night after dropping a buyin' at Razz and winning two HU matches. Cash is the grind baby.

Cash Game

Played some NLHE of the 25 dollar variety last night. I soon found my table infested with bloggers. We had Hoyazo, Smokkee, Fluxer, MiamiDon, JJ, Bayne, JecciiMD, Drizzle, and Sucko. We also had the lovely and overplaying of crap cards Texas. Sweetie I only say this because I love you: STOP PLAYING AT/KQ TO RAISES! I predicted she would get in trouble doing that after she cracked my JJ with KQ. Only gonna cause you trouble. Sometimes I am not all that happy to be right.

Sucko livened up the table by being a total donkey ass. I was able to benefit to the tune of one buyin against him but I wish it was more. I actually folded AKh against his first push at our table. Everyone gave me a hard time about it. Lucko basically was pushing ATC a lot that night.. this was his first hand. My reasoning was that AK vs ?? is not the best place to double up pre-flop. Sure I could be ahead or at worse slightly behind.. but when he is willing to bet into me with 86o on an AAx board when I am holding AJo I think I can wait for a better spot.

Smokkee had some luck stacking Lucko as well as some ass hats that joined the table as bloggers went to sleep. My other table was nuts. I got quads twice. I got KK cracked by AA pre-flop. I knew I should have folded. I keep hearing people tell me you never fold KK in these games. However I think if your instincts scream for you to fold you gotta go with them. I made the bad call because I was playing 25/NL instead of going with my gut feelings and playing the hand correctly.

The second table I was up a buyin twice.. and ended the night down five bucks. The first table I made a HORRIBLE call against Drizzle with TPTK and lost a huge pot. I ended up almost 2 buyins there.. for a net win of a little over 1.5 buyins. Not bad.

My statistics in PT are funny. I Lost the most with two bad plays with AK and KK. Next came T9s on a bluff. After that came a big suckout by a loser drawing to a straight. And last but not least was JJ when April called my pre-flop raise with KQ and hit.

Big winners of the night were TT.. when I flopped a set, rivered top boat and got paid off by JJ's trips. 77 with QUADS BABY! The aforementioned AJ hand with Sucko. A suckout on IamSkiddoo with AQ. The flop comes 77x so I stab at it small. The turn is an Ace so I stab at it again.. Skiddoo raises me to six, a min raise, and the river gives me the Aces full runner-runner suckout. Skiddoo calls my all in river bet. 76 s0000ted and 23off made straights and flushes for nice pots. The 76 s000ted flopped a flush against Skiddoo's TPTK and all the money went in on the flop with him drawing dead to runner-runner KT. Those hands are always good for the soul. No stress at all.

Anyway.. I probably will donk it up a bit with Katitude at the 1$ rebuy tonight on Full Tilt. I also will hit the cash tables again and try and make some money. Until then. Peace.

The Man Who Could Be King

Last night was a fun time at the Mookie. I started the night by dropping like 160 playing Razz and a few SNGs. Not alot of fun when your A234's keep flaming out and getting killed by JJK's. The fun of Razz.

The Mookie was insane. I have practically never been that card dead in my entire life.

The first hand of the night I did not realize AlCantHang was not playing. So I checked down a weak hand with him.. wondering why he had not stabbed at the pot yet.. and he ends up sucking out and winning that hand. It was very amusing. Can not even beat the guy when he is not there.

Later on I tried to get Al into the points by getting everyone to limp in and fold a blind to him for one orbit. Everyone had 2K+ and the blinds where 120.. However nobody likes Al so that never happened.

I laid down a few decent pre-flop hands in EP like TJ s00ted. Obviously you drop these cards early because someone probably is going to raise later. Otis did. With his TJ s000ted. Ouch. The flop comes AQK.. and Otis got plenty of action.

I pushed as a shortie three or four times to keep myself alive. First push was with K6o. I did not notice it was on Fluxers blind.. and with his HUGE stack he probably could of called me.. however he made a rare fold and I survived. I then got some nice hands like AK and chipped up a little.

I almost made the final table on TripJax's tailcoat. I pushed KK from early position with a 2500 chip stack. He had me covered and something told him to fold his AJ.. he listened for once and escaped my evil clutches. He went on and on about how he thought I had a strong Ace and had to fold. I chided him to try and make him call me the next time but he was having none of it. Well played sir.

Finally I make a move I may have been able to get away from. I would do a queer "You Decide" but I do not care what your decision would be so why ask. Actually it is always amusing to hear your pathetic strategy comments so feel free.

I had chipped up to 3K and the blinds were 150/300 with an ante. I look down and see what really was one of the only decent hands I had seen all night: AQo. So I say fuck it and push. Fluxer with his gynormous stack calls with snowmen. He spikes his eight on the flop and I river a queen to rub it in. Where is my runner runner fucking straight? Hello? Jeeez. Anyway.. my thinking here was I was short. I needed a double up. I did not want to chip down to 400 chips and then push and wonder why 47o called me. I do think I could have waited to see if I got a better hand for an orbit or two but I am not heart broken about the play and as it worked out I was only a slight dog pre-flop. The only reason to not push there was: position and anything that calls me is likely ahead possibly way ahead. All in all though I played good for being so card dead.

I think my pointage for this event is going to get me up close to 5th place. If that lazy asshole Al would get off his drunken ass and post the current leaderboard I would know for sure. However I scored a decent amount of points with my 17th place finish.. Most if not all the people ahead of me did not finish well. The guys who did finish well were way behind. So I keep within a win of crushing MiamiDon's spirit and taking his first place mantel for my own. No idea if this is going to happen but we shall try.

Tonight I think I will just have some fun and play some 5-10$ 90-peeps or a 5-10$ MTT. See if I can make a nice score and crank the roll up a bit more. See you then.

Spam..

I have no idea if this is SPAM or not but I went and signed it anyways. I am waiting for the slew of poker table emails to avalanche me. I did get this from Lou Kriegers blog so it might be valid. I just have no idea where it is coming from or where it is going..

Hi Friends,

I have just read and signed the petition: "Repeal Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act"

Please take a moment to read about this important issue, and join me in signing the petition. It takes just 30 seconds, but can truly make a difference. Please sign here:

http://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeaction/306149419

Thanks!

Battle of the Mookiement

After three years I give up coming up with titles to posts. jesus.

I told JJOff he has to play tonight! If he does not he will not get any Jecii points and will be unable to get his super secret decoder ring.

Apparently AlCantHang has put a bounty on my head. Cool gear from the land of the Waffle House. Nice. Nice.

It is actually with heavy heart I play the Mookie tonight. You see my friends I have been putting such a big hurt on little Ray Ray lately that I have mixed emotions. I mean the poor guy blows a 75K chip lead HU against Wawfulls. He then gets taken down the very next MTT when he is off to a great start. I just own the man. It is kind of silly. Now normally this would give me no end of joy. However my sorrow and mixed emotion comes from knowing that the dear sweet LoveElf has to listen to his whining and crying when he loses to me yet again. Poor poor girl.

See you all tonight!

In the points..

Well for yet another week I have amassed a huge stack, maintained it in the middle game, and gone out far too early. I am encouraged that I have been getting large stacks and maintaining them and another score is just a game or two away. Sometimes when you are outplayed by someone you have to take your lumps and learn and wait for your next chance at revenge. If I had to be taken down by someone I think Otis is a pretty good guy to be taken out by.

The night started really promising. Smokkee raises my blind and I decide to see a flop with QT diamonds. The flop hits me well with two diamonds and all low cards. Smokkee bets out. Here I decide to make a play. I figure if Smokkee raised me with a hand like AK/AQ/AJ he is a good enough player to let go of his hand. If he however has some kind of pocket pair then we might be in trouble. So I re-raise Smokkee and he shoves all his chips in after considering his options. I consider what he might have and I think at the very least I have 9-flush outs and possibly 3 over cards if not 6. I decide to gamble early and either make some chips or take my ball and go home. So I call his all in shove. He shows JJ. So I have 12-outs twice over. The turn is a Jack of diamonds and before I can figure out of Full Tilt is rubbing it in to Smokkee or setting me up the harmless river comes and I am scooping a large pot.

I continued playing well and finally got switched to a new table. I will say my starting table was rough. I think I did well to chip up there. I made some nice folds against cmitch and played fairly well against the likes of Sucko, Smokkee, CMitch, and other assorted Fonkeys.

I then got sent to the Otis/Cmitch table. Here is where Jacks were definitely not good. The first hand I get jacks I re-raise to 940 when one limper and the blinds are in the pot. I really just want to take it down. Some fonkey who's name I have banished from my mind calls a 940-chip re-raise with the powerhouse of KQ and spikes a King on the flop. He then pushes all his chips in. If he really did have KQ as he said then that is the most fonkiest move I have ever seen. I mean how do you not even consider that I have AK? I think a more likely scenario is the fonkey had 55 or 33 and spiked his lucky 2-outer. My next steal attempt is picked off. I am feeling a little annoyed as my stack is getting a little smaller. I then get into my final hand of the night.

Otis raises to 1K on the blind. I look down and see the hookers and seriously consider folding. However I decide to push back. Part of the reason I did this was because Otis was on the button and could easily have been stealing. So I pop it another 1500. Otis calls. Now to me this either says "Big Hand" or something like AK. Apparently it says the prior more than the former if your playing good players like Otis unlike the normal fonkeys at these things. The flop comes a killer 223 and the pot is 3K. I have around 3K sitting behind. I really think in this spot betting small encourages someone to come over the top of you. So I had to decide if I was ahead or not. I felt there was a good chance I was and so I pushed. Otis called with QQ and I did not improve.

I have filed this additional information into my vast memory stores for random access later and look forward to facing Otis in the future. I think one of my strengths in poker is I get better the more I play against a person. My instincts sharpen and I really am able to get good reads. That kind of hand is really one of my weaknesses. I mean the pair looks sooooo good and then that flop does nothing to discourage me from thinking that.

This is a good example of where you need to play the player. If it was another person then the EV on putting money in with my jacks in that spot might be good. If it is someone as experienced as Otis then possibly I need to consider how he would play more.

One of the reasons I think I get paid off ALOT, besides the Waffles Tilt Factor, is because I play differently from most other people. I never was a Super System guy and it makes my plays different to read. Some of the bets I make look a certain way to people brought up in that book. Anyway.. I played a decent game. Room for improvement. Possibly Moved past the guy two spots in front of me. See you all at the Mookie Wednesday.

Monday at the Hoy

Tonight is Mondays at the Hoy where I continue my quest to dominate the Blogger Wars and put the little people in their place. BWAHAHAHAH! Bring it! After my nice win at Riverchasers followed up by some decent Razz cash games and a weekend of the bad side of variance I am currently well stacked and looking for my next big win.

The only blogger I want to get a piece of this week is:

IGGY "The Suckenator" Blogfather.

Good luck all..

Grinding it out

God damn poker is fucking nutz. I sat at this razz table for 5 hours only played good hands. Got up to 90, sucked back down to 40, up to 80, down to 40, ended up with 130. Missed draws with a234, won huge pots with t7. Poker is stupid crazy. Razz is fun though but I think it may drive me more insane than I already am.

I was watching a maybe hot chick recite some Kurt VonnegutVonneget.. however the hell you spell it. He is dead. He doesn't care how I spell his name anymore. Anyway they were from a book called: A man without a country. Good stuff.

How come this chick has herpies on her face?

Razz continues to be interesting. The winning patterns are odd. I will lose two buyins and then have a monster night where I win 3x-5x buyins to make up my loses then some. Rinse. Repeat. Crazy game. If that is how it is going to work though then so be it. Bankroll is steadily growing. Just shy of seven hundred now. Keeping to a 200BB bankroll standard for now also.. although I tend to play 2/4 every once in a while. Not sure if the variance in Razz is high or low? Not sure also what the bankroll requirements should be. Oh well.

Blame Smokkee

You all can blame Smokkee for how insufferable I am going to be for the next few days. Man did I have a ton of fun. Winning was good.. but collecting bounties, outlasting the doubters and the haters, and playing HU with Smokkee rules!

Al update that damn leader board so I can crack the top ten! I am waiting!!!

I like playing guys like Smokkee. Since they are super aggro donkeys it makes it easy. Ha! Just kidding. I actually used to think Smokkee was one of the biggest donkeys around but I have changed my view. I respect him as a player and I enjoy the challenge of taking on one of the better MTT players I know. Being able to gloat a little helps too!!! Blew a 100K lead Smokkee.. no way you ever live that one down!

I think if there were not people like Smokkee, Lucko, and Hoy I would never have been at all interested in making my MTT game better. Even MiamiDon has been a great help as I have seen him donkeyfieing his MTT game and having a lot of success.

I have a long ways to go. I used to sit around and wonder why my little stacks got cracked after folding for six hours. I now take a more aggressive approach and make sure I can gain chips no matter what. If you want to bust me you will have to risk a good portion of your stack. It gives me a greater edge than pushing as a small stack. I still have to add EVEN MORE aggression to my MTT game and since that does not come natural it will take some time.

Speaking of aggression I think I only really made one mistake during the whole MTT and I am actually not sure it was a mistake. I actually think I would do it again. Three of us are left. I raised Smokee's blinds 4800. He had 22K behind and I had 75K. I had KQc. He open shoves and I call. He turns over JJ and while I improve his set of Jacks wins the day for him and we are tied. My thinking here is that I have a chance to take out a tough player and gain most of the chips in play. My hand is probably behind but only about 4-hands that is is WAYYY behind and the rest are 60/40 flips. Any comments on this hand?

I thank everyone for coming by and congratulating me. I hope to force you to do this more in the future. I even got a nice call at 1AM from Weak, Don and Scott, as they crushed the Texas games, sending me their well wishes. It means a lot to have so many people who support my game and encourage me to experiment and become a better player all the time. I could name dozens of other people who rooted me on in the girlie chat last night but they know who they are and they know they are the fuel that keeps the Waffle cooking. Ok now that was Ghey AND corny!

The next fun event on the agenda is probably Katitudes $1 rebuy tonight. It starts at 9PM EST and features many, many, many rebuys. I ended up on the bubble last week and hope to do better this week.

As for bankroll building I am continuing to play 1/2 RAZZ. I am having fun playing it.. killing the game for the moment to the tune of 12BB/100 and hopefully can keep up a good streak. I will start 2/4 Razz at $1200 which will be double my current bankroll. One nice little score in an MTT here or there and I may hit those 8/16 tables a little quicker than I thought. Until next time.

Riverchasers part I

Won a free $11 buyin by defeating the sponser of Riverchasers -- Check
Jeciimd could not fold to the points -- Check
Bayne financed my final run -- Check
Busted CMitch for $5 bounty -- Check
Entered HU as a 100K to 25K underdog -- Check
Got insulted by Smokkee and called Wauffles -- Check
Made Smokkee shut up by winning -- Check
Won $33 bounty from SellTheKids when he put an 11$ bounty on my head and I said if I make first you pay me $33 -- Check
Paid out a $5 bounty to bust Ossuusssuuuurrruuusss -- Check
Watched Iggy go down in flames -- Check

All in all a pretty good night..

New Feature: Top [x] Payback Time

A new feature of this here blog is going to be a pre-event who I am gunning for top [x] list. The top list will be more relevant towards the top and the bottom will probably be perennial favorites. I reserve the right to have as many or as few people as I want. So here goes..

Tournament: Riverchasers Tour Event #8
When: Thursday, April 19th, 9:00pm ET
Game: NLHE
Buyin: $10 1
Password: riverchasers8

The top ten people I want to get..

#1 - Poker "99 Is better In restaurants" Enthusiast: Calling an all in with 99 to show his worth of the number one spot. I have notes on you and your going down!
#2 - Iggy "The LuckSack" Dward: You have been such a lucksack bastard it is not even funny. You bust me from two tourneys in a row when I was ahead in both.
#3 - Jecci "Show me the Points" MD: It will be hard to get this guy since he folds and folds and then folds again so he can say "Hey I outlasted half the field and got points.. I am special". I will give it my best shot though. Some people can dodge Aces, he can fold them.. pre-flop!!!
#4 - The "Fat Ass" Fat Guy: He knocked me out of a tourney two weeks ago. While I have knocked him out of the past two it has been so much fun playing with him I am going to go for it again.
#5 - Smokkee "AJ is Golden" Donkerus: I am still annoyed that he goes from 1000 chips to 9000 chips in a hand with AJ when on the flop he is dead to 3 outs. Just boggles my mind. Good job Full Tilt you fucking retards! Work on that card generator a little more why dontcha?
#6 - Ick "This is what poker is really like?" karis: This guys been facing the realities of poker -- I.E. That he sucks. So I feel this is a great time to lay the smackdown on his ass as payback for those months of running so well. I have been ahead of him in the Special Olympics points for the past two weeks so I hope to continue the trend.

Ok.. that is all for now. See you all tonight!

Pushing JJ is Better than Calling 99..

In which my good friend the Poker Enthusiast proves why he is just an enthusiast and not a good player when he calls my all in with 99 vs my JJOFF! They were certainly not ok as he spikes a 9 on the flop. He even took the FULL time to think and make the call. I mean if your cards are so good then why did it take you so long to call? You know why? Cause you knew you were beat and did not care. That is the sign of a true winner. Implied Waffles Tilt Odds Suck (tm)(c) april, inc, 2007.

At least it was not that retard Iggy who again proves what a genius he is when he calls off his entire stack with A3o and proceeds to make trip 3's.. Little people suck.

I then proceeded to go out in tenth place in the razz MTT. A fucktard calls a 3-bet on the flop with a King.. and ends up rivering my 7 low. Against two people he is drawing to a king. What a retard!! Fucking A!

At least I am up over thirty bucks in the Razz cash game tonight and as a bonus I made the points so now I am special like Jeciimd!!!! You know what it is that actually bothers me about that.. its like when your mommy used to tell you that your piece of shit clay bowl from school was "Very Nice", or that you were "a handsome young man!".. It just sounds like the special Olympics.

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOK!

I love the Mookie on Full Tilt. It is at 10:00EST tonight I read wrong or something. It is by far my favorite game.. not only because my hard work made it the success it is today but because I love playing T8o like the hammer and shouting MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK! as loud as I can every Wednesday. Now that it is part of Alvin's big brogger bruhaha it should get even more participation than usual.

Apparently Jeciimd was somewhat miffed about something I said.. I guess I said he was tight and folded to the bubble a lot. Not that he was a bad player. Just too tight for MTT play unless your goal is to make the bubble or the little money. All of this goes along with my recent experimentation with more aggressive MTT play. The interesting part about his rant.. and I did enjoy it.. besides the blatant mis-information about number of blogger cashes in the past eight months.. is he totally agrees with me.

So I tell him something I think he could work on in his game.. he then calls me all kinds of names and says I am totally wrong.. and yet, in the very same post, he says this..

Moving right along to the Big Game last night, I abandoned my check-fold strategy in favor of some actual poker playing. Unfortunately the results were eerily similar--i.e. deep run, points, no cash. -- Jeciimd

Ummm.. So lets see.. If I can paraphrase.. Poopy mouth how dare you say I fold too much doodie head I am better than you, nah nah nah. Oh btw I do fold too much. Is that the post in a couple of sentences or less?

Anyway.. schizophrenia works great for me I am glad to see you enjoying it too.

The Razz King

I really like Razz alot.. It is a good mix of a game where skill can give you an edge but luck can kick you in the balls or pull your azz out of the fire. It is a high variance game for sure. As I continue to play more of it in the cash game arena I am starting to coming around to dropping weak 8-low starter hands. While an eight is sometimes good enough to win it is very vulnerable. Especially when you have an 876 type hand and someone is showing lets say a xx8Q4 board. Any card on the end can kill you easy. You are ahead at this point but with the donkey drawing going on you may not stay that way.

Observation skills are key. I need to find some reading materials on the game though.. I am not sure if you start with a 4/draw if there is any point you should let go of it. Normally I will play my 4-draw to the river and then fold if I do not improve. So if I start with a board like 2357 then get KK.. I am not folding until that 7th card screws me. I think this is optimal strategy but who knows.

Did I mention how fun it is to get my chips in ahead of Iggy every time and have him suckout? No. hmm.

Our boy Joe Speaker has a rant to rival even mine.. Be easy on him he does not have the practice I do.

Has anyone ever noticed how there are roving bands of low wage workers? What do I mean by this? One week I will come in to McDonalds and the staff is all Hispanic. So I brush up on my Spanish only to come back a month later and find out it is the Brazilians then the Jamaicans. Every month or so a new gang of workers comes in. I have to learn to decipher a new set of incoherent English ramblings and finally get my food. It is kind of crazy.

Where art Thou Peech Sacks

So the Mondays at Hoyazo event while fun was a pain in the ass. First off I get into a last longer bet with Smokkee. He is down to like 1200 chips and I have around 4K. He then gets into this beauty of a hand where the flop comes AAT and he has AJ, his first opponent has AK, and our very own Hoyazo has TT. The turn brings his 3-outter and nobody is getting away from this hand.. not even Smokkee if the J never comes.. all hell breaks loose and all of a sudden Smokkee has 10K in chips and is looking good.

I then get this beauty of a hand. The Drunken shrivled one who looks more like a mole rat than Michael Craig slow plays his Aces pre-flop like the Uber genius he is. I then flop a flush. Now how do you get the uber genius who never writes about poker because he sucks at it to commit all his chips? Of course you bet pot on the flop. When he turns over his set of sevens and you start chanting "Do not pair the board.. do not pair the board.." and you see that second four come on the river.. well that is basically the end of your night.

I ended up pushing a smallish stack with TT vs Smokkee and his FAWKING 5's, and BuddyDonk and his hookers. The flop came AQx and the new pussy Smokkee checked it down to the river. The old Smokkee would jammed it all in there. What the hell happened to his sack?

The final insult of the night was when that uber posting midget sucked a few more golf balls through garden hoses and ended up winning the whole freaking thing!!!! Can you believe that? Has he ever won a Blogger event? I can not remember if he has.

Oh well at least the 8/16 razz treated me well for the night..

Ayup Gary, Ayup..

I spent a lazy Sunday afternoon in the pouring rain all southern style fishing as I image Gary and his mullet doing many an afternoon. The town I live in had the annual fishing derby for the children. The good folks as park and rec took 200 assorted fish and threw them into the pond by us. The fish were then onslaught by screaming children swinging hooks around everywhere trying to catch a fish or an eyeball or some other parts. At least the rain kept all but the most die hard fishers inside. Despite the cold weather and the soggy everything it was a bit of fun. One of our neighbors who fishes a lot came by with some shiners (live fish) and we ended up catching a couple of 13" trout as well as missing a HUGE bass that bit through the line just as I had him on shore and flopped back into the water. Bastard! It turns out that this cost my son his trophy as he finished in 4th and much like his father was the bubble boy. He was not very pleased by this and his rotten attitude did not make the afternoon at all pleasant. Eventually it was my fault for not catching the fish the right way. Apparently I can not out fish the 6 year old who won 3rd and I should give up now. Dammit Jim, I am a programmer not a fisherman!!!!

The day did not improve all that much as I just had the worst luck possible at the Big Game. I then coupled that with frustration and pushed myself out when I did not need to. The one thing about playing Jecii is he barely bluffs and if he bets huge into you he has something. I knew this and was just tired of everything missing. I swear it was a comedy of errors. I raised pocket pairs several times and got called and each time the person crushed the flop. Like against said Jecii the first time when his 89o spiked trips. The only good hand of the night was when I kneecapped Tripjax. He limped the small blind with A8o.. the flop comes ATT.. I have T3o.. and I check/call and then push the river against him. He of course can not fold to me and pays me off instead. Open raise those small aces if your going to play them out of the small blind.. and never stack off on that kind of board against a non-raised pot. Poker has a funny way of rewarding crap cards if they are allowed to limp in. My final hand of the night came against Jecii again.. I open raised my AJo (I know stupid) and the flop comes 9Jx. I figure this is a good flop. I lead out for 500.. and Jecii makes it 1500.. and I say "I know he has me beat but this is getting too frustrating".. so I pull the cord and eject the rest of my chips. He flopped a set of 9's. Card rack. I thought he might have a good chance of folding to the money with the early chip up but he bailed around 12th. Oh well.

I also tried a PLO game. Now I am tre suck at PLO but I look down and see an AT3T spades. I raise it Trauma style.. trying to build a pot so I can push someone off on the flop. Anyway I hit the deadly top set with T86. I push a pot sized bet. Cold Called. Turn is a 7. Another pot sized bet which puts me all in for my full 4K. Cold Called. Dude flips over 526A for a five high diamond draw and a gutshot straight draw. Now I am not genius in PLO HOWEVER a five high flush and the ass end of a straight draw seems like two great ways to get stacked on PLO. However it being donkey day the nine hits the river and my set goes down in flames. Again.. the hands you play in PLO are things like QQJK s000ted. So even if he makes his draw many many many times he is going to be beaten. It was just a real bad play in my opinion. Although I might concede that I played my top set too hard.

Anyway.. tonight is the MATH. I was looking through the standings of the Battle of the Bloggers. While 34 out of 159 is statistically the higher end of mediocre I should be able to do better. I got a chuckle out of Veneno in last. Followed up by my boy Smizmitch. heh. Not so funny have Ick, Bayne, Jordon, and even Bone Daddy ahead of me in the standings. Crazy crazy crazy. Oh well. See you tonight.

Midnight Madhouse

Played the late Midnight Madness Game. Finished in 25th. Getting closer. Ended up shoving my chips in with 4K blinds, a 48K stack, and pocket tens. I get in with a 13K stack who has KQ and a 150K stack who has AK. To be fair the AK guy raised before me. Not that he was gonna lay it down if I was the initial raiser. Anyway. Queen on the flop. Ace on the turn. Ten on the river. To give me a set and BOTH other people a straight. I am out on my ass. Good showing for that thing though. I possibly should have let that hand go.. but as it turned out I think I got my money in fairly well and if I actually do beat AK I am up to 60K, if I beat both of them I am up around 100K. AT least it was not A7o right?

MiamiDon's big game is tonight. Get yourself some blogger leaderboard points by playing. I intend to be at the game.

Victory is MINE!

So my hard work and donkifying of my game is starting to pay off. First off I know I am on the right track because EVERYONE is calling me a donkey and asking when I will implode and spew chips and becoming extremely violent with me. Now normally you would think this is a bad thing. However I think back to the past..

When I coined the name Sucko for Lucko...
when I called CJ a fucking Luckbox bastard
.. when I berated Smokkee for an aggressive push ..
.. when I could not fathom that call by Ick ...

These are the guys in our group who win a lot of MTTs so if your calling me the same names as them I MUST be doing something right..

The other more solid proof is that my results are starting to show up. In the last eight blogger games I have played I have had the top chip lead for a great deal of the game.. I have won one of these games and bubbled a couple ..

In the past 4 MTT games I have played this week I have made 3 final tables and cashed 3rd once.. I know the games are smaller right now and the cashes are a few hundred bucks for a five or ten dollar buyin but I am showing a lot of success.. not to mention doubling my bankroll and having almost a foothold of a bankroll on Full Tilt now..

I have also had some bad games especially tokens lately.. but all in all I think the results are coming along. I am staying very aggressive throughout the entire game once the blinds hit 100 and not slowing down for the bubble much. I have changed my view on what I should be shoving with and when I should be making calls and those few adjustments have helped.. all in all I am getting closer. I still have problems with the very aggressive 1-18 spots but I seem to be making better decision.

Hopefully I will continue to see results as I play more and more MTTs every day. I am still going to keep to the lower buyins for now.. and play some tokens to mix it up and give me a shot at a bigger payday. Obviously the players will be a little better in these and I will probably have to adjust some more.

Attack of the Weasel People

Michael Craig got his image put on Full Tilt.. and.. well.. It looks just like him.

Rebuy Ehhh?

Katitudes Friday night bash is without a doubt the most fonkiest donkey fucking game ever.. and actually a whole hell of a lot of fun. Tonight I played against one of the best donkey players in the world, an English chap napped Alf. Unlike Iggy I will link you if you send me your url.

In the end we degenerated to making more egregious donkey calls against each other and swapping stacks back and forth for most of the night. All of this was after the rebuy period was over. It all started out all innocent like. I have a decent stack going and as I have been trying to do I decide to play aggressive. So I raise pre-flop and get called by said donkayy and the flop comes down AQT. Now my buddy Alfie does not have me covered and I have raised pre-flop and I have a gut shot and a pair.. so I decide to be aggressive and put him in. He makes the call and what do you think he flips up? Well on that board it must be a straight or AK at the least right? I mean I chose a bad place to bluff right? Well you decide..



So now I have this guy pegged as a fonkey who is going to call anything I bet.. So a few hands later I look down and see 99.. I still have his azz covered and so I raise my 9's up pre-flop. He comes OVER THE TOP of me and I make the call. Now he must have at the very least AK right? I mean he saw a strong raise and felt his hand was ever stronger and pushed his entire stack into the middle with it. No, instead he has the hand that I named: The CoxLover. Q fucking J! What the hell?



So by now I am seething mad and have called Mr. Alf a retarded moron motherfucker about nineteen times. If I was really mad it would have been worse. I know it is a 1$ rebuy but the lucksackedness I have seen has driven me over the edge and it is payback time.

So we get into this beauty. He shoves again pre-flop when I have limped with a weak hand like KQ. I say "Whatever.. I quit.. Enjoy my chips"... and then this happens.



The rest of the game we both kept making equally donkish moves against one another. I finally chilled out and relaxed and ended up having a good time. I was not said to see him go though!!! heh.

I ended up outlasting him and bubbling when I pushed a weak ace into Pokerwolf's AA. I fucking owe PokerWolf a beating as he has gotten me the last few times we have played. Good job taking it down Wolfie! He collected the extra bonus of Baynes double bounty for taking me out. Make sure you get you ten bucks!!!!

Nappy Ass Hoe Cunt Bag Pussies and Hoyazo Loves Darren Oh yeah and Pimp Katitude

First with the pimpin' of my non-nappy ass Canadian hoe Katitude. She is having her friday 1$ freak show and wants you to play. Come to Full Tilt at 9PM - Password = donkarama. If you think it is funny sucking out on me once try doing it 11 times! That is my rebuy limit for the night. Should be fun.

I remember when I was a child and there was no black or white it was just Jose, or Troy, or Jordon. Until we treat people that way the world will never be at peace. We are all just people.

Who gives a crap about Imus really. I think Imus was allowed to exercise free speech and his employer was allowed to exercise their rights. In addition Reverend Jackson and that other hate monger were able to exercise their right to free speech also.. and now I have the free speech to disagree with any of them. It is a great country. Do not shed any tears for Imus either he is rich as hell and will probably only get richer from this.

I was reading Hoyazo today and apparently he told a ten year old boy that his mother was a cunt. I just do not even know where to start with this. However I might as well put in my two cents.

It is people like you who make the world a miserable place to live in. Sure the people who cut in line are morons and I have no problem going up to someone and telling them that they were wrong. When you lose your temper so badly that you introduce a child to language like that then you have crossed the line.

I mean give me a break. Get some perspective. Chill out. What kind of pathetic life do you have to live to want to do that just because someone stole your spot. I am not saying to not stand up for your rights but life is too short to go around beating people up for bumping you in line.

I rant and rave and get stuff out on my blog. If you wrong me in person I will tell you so. I will not however go to your child and tell him that your a fucking cunt. I will not beat the crap out of you because you stole my parking spot. Life is too short. Grow up Hoy.

Just as a side note to Darren too. The JJOFF Comment! Priceless man! HAHA! I am going to be calling him JJOff for ever now. However when you say: "Do I care? Most definitely not.." in your 3rd comment posted each being like four paragraphs long it loses it's credibility!!! Why the hell would you be writing a novella in Hoyazo's comments if you did not care. You would just go on and read the next blog. Admit man! You care! It is ok. You can cry on my shoulder if you need to.

90-peep

Played. Guy limps. I push for over 6K. He has 20K. Makes the call with 79d. Ace on the river and I am bubble boy. So pushing A6 sucks balls. Pushing AQ s000ted sucks balls. How the fuck do you win that final 2-3 tables. Answer: Play 7,000 MTTs a day and then write about the one you win. Ahhhhh. Now I know the secret. Fucking loved that I got that call there. Fucking retards get so lucky though.

Middle Game Does it Elude me?

I played another stellar Mookie.. staying in first most of the game and finally going out against THG. I am totally convinced that I am getting closer to a good end game in these things but either not getting the luck when I need it or missing out on a key part. Take tonight. I had 7K in chips. The blinds are 500. I have the chips to be a pussy and fold to the money like JJ. The game got wild at this point obviously with 13 people left. The table I was on was big time aggro raising every orbit and re-stealing alot. Now this is not my ideal environment. I finally have THG raising 2K while I am the SB. I consider folding but decide to push my A6 instead. It costs him about half his stack but he calls with AJ. I do not entirely agree with the call especially since I was being pretty damn tight but if it was a read or whatever then so be it.. I will say he played a very good end game being aggressive and re-stealing some large pots. Hats off to that.

The thing that is interesting to me is when do you play back at these end table? It is costing me around 800 an orbit, everyone is raising like crazy, I could fold to the 19$ and have like 2K chips and hope something good happens. I could wait forever for Aces and then see them cracked because I have no chips. I really need to improve this part of my MTT game and I am at a loss of what to do. I think maybe there is no answer. I think having a major collapse at the end of the game is the right move.. and the time I get lucky and get cards is the time I will take first. I do believe my middle game has gotten stronger. I play that part a lot better. Oh well. Comments? Ideas?

Oh and I have to apologize to Hoyazo since I won a HUGE pot with "The Hoy", AT s00ted.. I never realized it was such a strong hand! Bayne showed me the errors of my ways as he felt the wrath of the Hoy!

Hoyazo has lost his fucking mind

Ok. Now normally I think Hoyazo is a decent player and he has a long history of cashing and his thinking is usually sound. However when you question his stupidity in a hand he really goes off the deep end in justifying his brilliance. I mean is he fucking Cinderella and if he admits he is a donkey his fat ass will turn into a pumpkin?

I mean first off ATo is a fucking retard hand and why he is raising it in the first place I have no idea. He does not mention anything such as how much the raise was, what position he was in, etc, etc..

WillWankah the alleged donkey makes a good analysis that I totally agree with. Hoy was in bad position. Hoy had a shitbox hand. Hoy raised like a moron. The blinds were small. Will had a very small call to make and the implied odds in this hand turned out to be HUGE since Hoyazo then compounded his pre-flop donkery with the ultimate in donkery and not only gets felted with second pair which apparently is "Hitting the flop hard" for him.. but thinks any of the play from the initial raise is defendable?
I mean come on Hoyazo.. when you play weak crappy hands out of position OF COURSE your going to get into trouble.. and when you play them even WORSE on the flop then forgettaboutit. You brought that hand on yourself and nobody else played poorly.

Then the hilarity ensues to no end when people try and make the point that maybe he never should have been in the hand to begin with and possibly Will did not make a bad call.

Knowing that you will go th the felt with hands like TPTK, make it +EV to call your raises with semi-junk. Now who is the donkey?
-- Blinders

An interesting comment, Blinders. Only problem is, it is hugely -EV to call preflop raises against me with JT. So I guess that makes the guy who calls the preflop raises from me with JT the donkey. To answer your question.
-- Hoyazo

See the emphasis point here: call raises against MEEEEEEEEEEE.. how could you? Totally inconceivable. Someone playing against me the all powerful Hoy!! Total bullshit answer and not correct. In addition it is HUGELY -EV to raise ATo in early position and not even including calling your entire stack off with second pair.
I mean seriously how can making $1500 on a what $90 call be -EV???!?

If you asked me what hand I would rather raise in EP JT s000ted or ATo I would answer JT s00ted every time. It has much better chance of making a strong hand on the flop.. and the hands that are likely to call are not hands that have me totally dominated. I would rather have JT vs AK than AT vs AK. Think of the hands that are likely to call an EP raise. No question about it.

Anyway.. although I respect Hoyazo and his abilities at large scale MTT games I think he is losing it.. His usual excellent analysis of tricky situations like playing quads that we all face every other hand has degenerated into anyone who beats him being a donkey. It is a sad, sad, day and I mourn the passing of our good friends poker skills.

My New Car

I am just going to go cheap and reliable and go with a Toyota Corolla CE.

What is this the fucking library?

Anyone interested in swapping some books? I am reading mostly Sci-Fi these days.. Finished up the Star Wars Insect Trillogy (The Dark Nest Trilogy) as well as Outbound Flight. I am currently reading the New Jedi Order series where the Vong come in and torture the fuck out of everyone. Very dark Star Wars books. Love em! If you have not read the series it starts off with a bang and kills off a major character of the franchise really early. In the past this was a Lucas no-no but the new franchising Lucus does not mind killing his old friends to make a buck so it opens up some interesting possibilities.

I have the first five in the series Vector Prime, Dark Tide Duology and Agents of Chaos Duology. Should be done with those in a month and then will be looking for the rest of that series.

Any good suggestions on some Sci-Fi or Fantasy series? Penthouse doesn't count you pervs.

Reading is the only good thing about the train. I can not stand to be squished in with all of the retards of the universe as I go to work every morning. If people were a little more orderly the commute would go much better. Instead the commuters spread out to cover every free inch and run as fast as they can ignoring the laws of physics like only one object can occupy one space at one time. I really hate crowds and have to resist the temptation to throw elbows every day.

UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Upgraded to the new templates. #@&^%#&#@ new templates!

I switched back to the old template. Much more control over how it works but I like Googles attempt at making things easy.

I played a peep tonight. Came in 31st. Beat every blogger except AlCantHang. I had a big stack raising my blind every hand so I pushed with a reasonable AJ on the button.. and the BB had AA.. and the idiot had KT.. and the idiot hit his K.. FAWK! Not much you can do with 500 blinds and a 3K stack. I thought about trying to sit out until I made the money but it did not look like it was going to happen and I did not like my shrinking stack. Ah well.

Tomorrow I play the Mookie. My one goal: STOP MiamiDonk. That fucker is winning everything. Let us all take his ass down! Are you with me people!?!?!?!?!

After that I am not sure when the next game will be.. possibly the Big Game with McDonkey. If I run out of material I can always tell you about my early sex life.. that would be fun, right?

Fun Stuff

Our old friend Japa Hapa seems to have upgraded to the New Blogger as all of her old posts just splashed across my bloglines reader. Whee! If you have not read her/him/it/Ick? then you should.

For those of you married people who are whipped like.. well like we all are..



That old guy Andy Rooney is mouthing off as usual.. Andy Rooney said on "60 Minutes" a few weeks back. It is amazing he does not ever get fired. It is like he is America's senile old uncle who wanders around and says random shit and nobody pays him any mind just saying "That's ole' Uncle Rooney for ya!". I am not going to comment on any of his opinions but if you all want to have a flame war in my comments section go ahead..

I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the UnitedCaucasianCollege Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens...Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, that is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?

I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion.

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird, or tick me off.

When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the population is black, that is not racial profiling, it is the Law of Probability.

I believe that if you are selling me a milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you should have to speak English!

My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.

I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word "freeze" or "stop" in English, see the above lines.

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any other business.

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and open to their interpretations.

I don't hate the rich I don't pity the poor.

I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them.

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say "NO!"

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me French fries!

I am sick of "Political Correctness." I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa ; so how can they be "African-Americans"? Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe . I am proud to be from America and nowhere else

And if you don't like my point of view, tough...

I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG, OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA , AND TO THE REPUBLIC, FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL!

-- Andy Rooney

A co-worker sent this to me last week. Why is this scary? Your personal information is not all that personal. Anyone can find almost anything out about you and just because Google gives driving directions to a place does not add anything that you can not do easily without Google. Teach your idiot children not to give out your phone number.. also keep an eye on those little fucker.. Some people invest so much on their children and then do not give a second thought to leaving them in a running car while they skip into the market or some other stupid nonsense. I watch my kids like a hawk to the best of my ability. It is kind of sad kids can not have the freedom to go places by themselves but that is the world we live in.

This is scary...it really does work! See below.

Take a look and protect you information Google has implemented a new
feature which enables you to type a telephone number into the search
bar and hit enter and you will be given the person's name and address.
If you then hit MapQuest, you will get a map to the person's house.
Everyone should be aware of this! It's a nationwide reverse telephone
book.

If a child gives out his/her phone number, someone can now look it up
to find out where he/she lives. The safety issues are obvious, and alarming.

Second thing I probably hate most..

I am so fucking uber ranting mad about my fucking car right now it is ranking up there with.. well.. yeah, with poker. Taking it out on Jeciimd while fun is cool but not productive.

I am so pissed off about my car. I think the only thing that might piss me off more is the fucker I work with. He is a nice guy. However he is always smiling. Not this nice friendly smile but this creepy fucking I am a retard smile. Now he is apparently not retarded and is probably a smart guy but fucking cut the crap. I swear something is damaged in him. I am not sure if he was tortured for years by some communist Chinese dictator before he came to work in America or what but fucking creep someone else out.

Anyway my car has been getting new features over the last couple of months to a year. The first feature it got was: ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE! The fucking thing decided it only liked one channel on the radio and stuck there. I can not change the channel. I can not put a CD in. It is stuck. It might have something to do with all the Coke I have spilled down the front of it but I honestly think it is AI.

The next feature is started showing was the FREE GYM. It decided I was getting a little chubby so it turned off the power stearing. So now I have to have arms like a weight lifter just to get in and out of a parking spot.

Lately it has had decide I don't know what the SPEED LIMIT is.. so randomly the gears shift out and I get no traction and the car either slows to a sputtering stop or finally kicks back in with a nice grinding sound and gets me where I need to go.

The final straw tonight was the fucking BALLOON TIRES that keep popping every few months. I swear I have had more flats this year than ever before. I am heading towards some night work at my old job and get as far as Burger King before I have to pull over and park it. Luckily the guy I was working with tonight picked me up in his BMW sports car and drove me the rest of the way. I finished up my work and now at 12AM I am getting home, munching on crackers, and contemplating bed which will not come easily since I had to walk a few miles back to my car and am hyper right now.

I swear I do not make this shit up. Someone put a plague on my lineage years ago.. I suspect it was GOD but I do not have any proof. Anyway at least I do not have to worry about how I am getting to work until the morning.

Stupid is as Stupid does

First off I am not sure if Duggles is just fucking around or really is stupid.. but if I do not want to link to Iggy I wont. The fact that it was a joke made at the table and everyone who's business it is understands that is besides the point. Oh well. I will leave the Forest Gump of people skills alone.

I blew through my backers cash game stake. I can not say I am too unhappy about it. Playing with 2 buyins just does not usually work. Thanks for the fun times though. I do appreciate the backing and am sorry that the magic did not come together for a night and make some cash for you. Better luck next time I guess.

I am skipping the Hoyazo tonight. I figure if I do not play my standings can not drop that quickly, right? No but seriously I have some work that needs to get done this week so will probably be busy most of the week. Have fun boys and girls. Mookie and Riverchasers are a maybe also.

Hopefully I can scrounge up some more side work since it pays better than .05/.10 cents NL No-Foldem games. I think my interest in poker is on a downturn at this moment. No worries though I am sure it will perk up soon. Good luck to you all.

Special thoughts going out to Carmen too! I hope her date with Judge Judy goes well today. Keep her in your thoughts. Does not sound too serious but court is no fun.

Go read the unlinkable one too if you have not yet. He has an Uber-Uber that I tried to read waiting for work today but I only got through like half.

Happy Easter

The wife came up to me at 9:00 tonight and remembered that she forgot what tomorrow is. Yikes! So I steal out into the night and pickup some colored grass, eggs, candy, and all manor of crap. I lie to the kids and pretend there is a giant fuzzy bunny rabbit running around. I steal the food they leave out for said bunny.. and also read his mail and destroy it which I am pretty sure is a Federal offense.. all this to celebrate Christianity. I am glad we are not celebrating satanism, who knows what the hell I would have to do then.

*** EDIT: When you have an Anal retentive over competitive son who is actually going to COUNT the number of candies he and his sister got you should make sure they get equal amounts.

Babblefish Part Trez

>> Welcome to Babblefish 1.0

>> I am Cyberdyne Systems model 101,..and I am fluent in over 6 billion forms of communication. Which language do you wish to convert?
> Iakaris

>> Loading Iakaris Language protocol 0.11235.
>> Protocol loaded.
>> Memory Bounds Approaching Limitations

>> Please enter a word (like if) or series of words to convert from Iakaris to English.
> I am coming up on my 100th post. It took a lot longer to get there than I would've thought when I was unemployed, posting everyday and unaware of the concept of being "too tired to play". Not there yet, but by no means is this spot over and done. As long as I'm reading I still feel like writing (if with less frequency) and as any of your stat counters could tell you, I am definitely still reading.

>> Translation processing…
>> Translation complete
>> Hi

>> Please enter a word or series of words to convert from Iakaris to English.
>Just busted from the 400k in a manner befitting how I've been running for over a month. Things just don't seem to work for me anymore. Superior mindset but inferior results. I just realized what many of you have been assuming for weeks/months.
This blog is dead. I am done with poker too. I don't mean it in a dismissive way at all, but for me there's nothing left to gain or prove. I just reread my first post. I should be satisfied; I acheived mediocrity and a couple of times I did indeed escape it. I was going to try to become a cash game specialist, but instead I think I will learn how to play golf this summer. And how to rollerblade. And play with my children even - assuming they still recognize me. Thanks to all for reading and teaching (the latter more than the former), and thanks especially to this guy for showing us all how to save the date via high technology. Low-tech Retards like me have to count on that most fickle of blades: irony. Fermentation at twelve and twelve again should suffice, but knowing my intemperate pen, this may well be it anyway.

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>> April fools

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> So basically I thought it as likely he was betting the killer sets as he was betting like a moron with AK/AQo. As in very mothafuckin unlikely. Potential sin that, but not one of omission. That left hands that I was a true race against given my baby flush and bottom pair. No way did I think I was getting in way ahead. But I did think I was getting exactly what I wanted. 50/50 (almost) for a big early stack.
What did I get instead? JJ for top set. 70 Wil v. 30 moi. nice read on my part no?
'Course I turned the flush to put a nail in our boy's coffin. I think to the table it looked like I called a push on a flush draw, without them noticing I had a pair too giving me 6 more all-important outs against an overpair. Against top set of course they were useless.

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>> I am so pretty.

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>The days since my last post have been somewhat uneven ones, but happily illumination has been at hand when the footing was most uncertain. The days are pressed now in my mind as a microcosm of the entirety of my time off, and the recounting of them seems worthwhile only because years from now I know I will wonder at my mindset during the transition back to my other life.

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>> zzzpppppfffttcrrckkkkllssspt

What Coulda Been..

Ever have one of those nights where your left thinking what could have been.. no I am not talking about IF that fucking little retard missed his flush draw. I am over that. I have come to realize that he just could not cut it as a pro because he has no poker skills and I have forgiven him.

Last night I got to deal with another fucktard. The MTT player fucktard. I look down to see my pretty little Aces. I have a nice $65 stack build up from grinding away for an hour or two. MTT-Tard raises in the EP. I re-raise him. He re-re-raises me and I push. I expect the fucker to turn over kings and am overjoyed to see AK. Until the flop comes QT.. and the river comes.. JACK ASS! Motherfucking tourney playing bastard took half my stack. Thank god he had the brains of a Llama and only bought in for half. SO I spend the next hour grinding back up to $65 and end the night. If that retard did not get lucky then.. well.. what coulda been..

In other news..

First off that little midget is NEVER getting a link from me. So stop begging.

Secondly in other things poker that I enjoy.. Anything but Holdem had a link to a Gary Carson talking about taking Michael Craig off his blog list because he is just a Full Tilt shill these days.. interesting stuff..

As far as the state of my poker game. It could not be better. I am on the top of my game. In the last five blogger games I have played I have had a top chip stack every single time and for a good deal of time. In one of those events I dominated the field and took it down. If I keep playing like this it is inevitable that I keep winning these. Not sixth place or bubble boy but first or out in a flaming ball of aggressive poker. I got my money in with two coin flips last night and have no issue with my play. One card falls different and I go into the final table with a nice 13K stack and kick some ass. I used to take my big stack and let it blind down to nothing so I could bubble out. No more. I am in these things to win.

My backers cash game money is doing ok. I have doubled it. I am a little rusty in my cash game as it is totally opposite of my mentality in an MTT or HU SNG. I have been making some terrible calls when I knew I was beat and need to just stop that. I have also made some really good plays which either worked out to get me someones stack or ended up getting sucked out on with 2-3 outs. No biggie.

My roll is also growing. Mostly doing SNGs and some Razz with it. The people who play razz are escapees from the lobotomy factory and need to get a clue. I can not wait to play that game a little more.

Next big MTT is the Mookie on Wednesday.

Fawking Hoyazo

Iggy is a fucking flush chasing cunt. All I have to say about the MATH. No Link for you little man.

At least I got to chat with Hoyazo a little..

[22:24] hoy: my AK could not hold up.
[22:24] SirFWALGMan: ah
[22:24] hoy: i knew he had a pair
[22:25] SirFWALGMan: fair race
[22:25] hoy: but i had raised first preflop, so i was getting WAY better than 50-50 odds to call it at that point.
[22:25] hoy: id be a donkey not to call.
[22:25] hoy: had 1/4 of my stack in there already.
[22:25] SirFWALGMan: yup
[22:25] SirFWALGMan: keep explaining away
[22:25] SirFWALGMan: your bad play
[22:25] SirFWALGMan: lol
[22:25] hoy: fucking infuriating but what can you do.

Couple shout outs. Played some poker with a reader and a new blogger pushed me off of Queens with Jacks! Good play that time.